Was my weekend guest rude?

I hosted my friend for the first time at my home this weekend, they stayed for 3 nights. Each of these days my partner cooked breakfast, lunch, and dinner except for one time out for lunch and dinner. Not one of these home cooked meals did they thank me or my partner for preparing them or that they enjoyed it.

Additionally, any free moment spent at the house or when driving with them, they spent buried in their phones playing random games or on social media. If they weren’t on their phones, it was sitting by them the entire time and they would check it constantly or be texting random friends of theirs instead of talking to me. It surprised me as times I have spent with this friend prior at their home they not once did this with their phone.

Lastly, I have a young child who was very excited to see them and I told them in advance she would want to talk to them a lot and show them her stuff. They did say they have very little experience with children, however they acted like any moment my child wanted their attention, it was almost painful for them to engage with her. It didn’t seem to really register with my child, but it hurt my feelings as my child was being very typical for her age and being excited for having a new friend (for her) over at her home. They would still engage with her but I could tell it was very forced, and they did not want to be doing so, it seemed to bring them no joy and instead annoyance. When my child was not present, they would make comments like “thank god she left, that’s exhausting!”. It felt inappropriate to me and I felt guilty for my child being a child.

Some things they did do that were considerate were they made their bed when they left, they did seem to “try their best” to engage with my child despite doing so begrudgingly, and they did pay for our appetizer at dinner.

All things considered though I found myself after they left feeling a little resentful for how they treated my family and I, but I also wonder if I am overthinking it? Thank you in advance for your input.

Before I had my own children I didn’t know how to engage with other people’s kids. Did you go and stay with them and be insulting about their children?

Yep (if he knew to do that which he might not if he’s not familiar with kids) or the parent could have directed her elsewhere which is what I used to do with my child when he was bothering people who weren’t interested/didn’t know what to do.

I'm saying this as someone with no massive aptitude or liking for kids: How hard is it to sit and read a book to a little kid for a bit?

In the OP's scenario, if he really couldn't bring himself to read (to the child of his host, who's meant to be a friend and who was putting him up and feeding him, but OK), he could have handled it much better; rather than just sitting awkwardly he could have said e.g. 'I bet Mummy's a better reader than me; shall we ask her?' and kind of telegraphed to you that he'd rather you did it. And maybe joined in a bit once the OP was reading.
He just sounds like a great useless lump with, as my mum would say, nothing about him.

I disagree. You can be polite (albeit he sounds like he was rude in other ways) and not play with, read to, or watch performances of other people’s children. Your child can also learn that other people are not always going to want to entertain them. And that’s ok.

If your friends have children those children live in their house, it's their home. I repeat, don't go and stay in a house where children live if you can't be bothered to interact with them and don't be rude about those children to their parents.

It must've taken a lot of effort to use "they" repeatedly in the OP despite her knowing that he is a he! What's the point when she told us all he's male within the first few responses?

Yes, it's been used for a long time in specific scenarios, but this was utterly unnatural and makes for more difficult reading.

I don't think it made any difference whether the guest was male or female and 'they' has long been used in a situation where you either don't know the sex or don't want to say. It's not confusing at all because it didn't matter.

Agree. I wasn't sure if she was talking about one person or two. Confusing.

So you should cut off your adult friends once they have children?!? Plenty of my friends don’t like the peoples kids. And I don’t like other peoples kids much either. I am friendly to them but I don’t want spend ages entertaining them. If I go to see a friend it’s to see them and have adult company, not interact with their children. I have never expected others to do so with my children either. If my children were annoying anyone I’d direct them away. Why do you think every one has to love your kids?

All that “they” stuff was very distracting, why hide that he was a male? It’s simply information. Yes he was rude.

I hosted my friend for the first time at my home this weekend, they stayed for 3 nights. Each of these days my partner cooked breakfast, lunch, and dinner except for one time out for lunch and dinner. Not one of these home cooked meals did they thank me or my partner for preparing them or that they enjoyed it.

Additionally, any free moment spent at the house or when driving with them, they spent buried in their phones playing random games or on social media. If they weren’t on their phones, it was sitting by them the entire time and they would check it constantly or be texting random friends of theirs instead of talking to me. It surprised me as times I have spent with this friend prior at their home they not once did this with their phone.

Lastly, I have a young child who was very excited to see them and I told them in advance she would want to talk to them a lot and show them her stuff. They did say they have very little experience with children, however they acted like any moment my child wanted their attention, it was almost painful for them to engage with her. It didn’t seem to really register with my child, but it hurt my feelings as my child was being very typical for her age and being excited for having a new friend (for her) over at her home. They would still engage with her but I could tell it was very forced, and they did not want to be doing so, it seemed to bring them no joy and instead annoyance. When my child was not present, they would make comments like “thank god she left, that’s exhausting!”. It felt inappropriate to me and I felt guilty for my child being a child.

Some things they did do that were considerate were they made their bed when they left, they did seem to “try their best” to engage with my child despite doing so begrudgingly, and they did pay for our appetizer at dinner.

All things considered though I found myself after they left feeling a little resentful for how they treated my family and I, but I also wonder if I am overthinking it? Thank you in advance for your input.