About neighbours complaining about children's noise

It doesn't sound like OP is being noisy at all unless she has a poltergeist.

Tell them this OP, that banging on the walls has clearly disturbed some undead spirits on their side and that's the noise they're hearing......😱 😆 👻

Laminate floors is my worse decision. If I'm having a lay in, my DS6 seems to run everywhere downstairs. Sounds like a heard of elephants. Step quietly!!!

I live next door to a 3 year old and it is terrible when he is running doing laps of the house but I have never discussed with the neighbours as they get him out all day and it's generally restricted to 7pm-9pm. Plus I hope he will grow out of it. In your situation I am confused what noise are the neighbours hearing when your children are in bed? I don't believe they would be getting worked up about non-existent noise.

These neighbours are complaining about “children’s noise” when the children are asleep, or out of the house. It clearly isn’t the children who are the problem here.

Do the new neighbours have children? If its just them too, they will barely make any noise.

is their wall an adjoining wall or is it the chimney side? I live in a terrace, i can hear neighbours on the plain wall but cannot hear anything chimney side. The walls with chimneys are thicker.

look youve got to live your lives. Yes be mindful but you have kids fgs. Theres going to be noise. Mention it to landlord and keep a diary. Report him too if hes doing house renovations out of hours. Hes got more to lose as it will affect him when selling in the future. Dont worry about neighbours, just be you. They will be on your side

Stop tiptoeing about and place the problem where it belongs - with them. If they are complaining about the noise even when your children are out, it is their issue.

Some people are unpleasant.

Who owns their house - are they renters or owners? If renters, I would be inclined to speak to their landlord about their behaviour.

If owners, keep a diary. Record when you are in/out and their actions. You may be able to report them for harassment if they persist. I would tell them your family have a legal right to live in their home.

Yes.

And I'm going to take a wild leap here and take it you're a lone parent? A woman on her own?

I think banging on the wall is not a very nice thing to do and I’d find it a bit intimidating. Noise does travel a bit in terraces but children playing is not a bad noise IMO. I would try to ignore them.

Years ago, we used to have a neighbour who complained about our kids playing too loudly, if they were in the garden anytime between 4 and 7pm. Once she sent her DH round, so I invited him in to listen to his children shrieking in the bath, as heard from our side! I chose not to mention her arguments with her mother about money, though 🤣 I think he got the point, and that was the last time he came round.

Sometimes people are just self absorbed, and don't consider that noise goes both ways. That said, it is reasonable to tell your kids to be much quieter if they are being noisy. We used to, anyway.

Sod that if they were to bang whilst my kids were asleep I'd be banging on their door. Telling them my kids are asleep and would they like to come and see for themselves what the noise is they hear. Oh and wake my kids up again and I'll be reporting you for harassment.

Ironically my new neighbors have tradesman in just now for over a week and it sounds like they are bringing the joining wall down, and they have taken to moving furniture in the bedrooms between 10 & midnight.

Make sure to record any more building noise.

Then if they come round again, play it to them and say "This is your building noise. This is what we've been listening to for all hours of the day, including between 10pm and midnight. This is what woke my children. And you have the nerve to complain about my children walking about and playing in their own home during normal daytime hours. Go away please and don't bother us again."

Do you think I could charge members of the public to look round my home and call it the "Terraced House" Experience ?

Have you never been to London? Almost the entirety of inner London housing stock is Georgian, Victorian or Edwardian terraces. Millionaires and billionaires live in terraced houses! Further out in the suburbs you get post-war semi-detached houses with one adjoining wall.

And you must move around like mist? Not seen, nor heard.
Astonishing.

I've had a very similar experience to yours OP in my current house. We moved in last summer with a toddler and me 8 months pregnant (much to neighbours dismay). They proceeded to bang on the wall at every little noise they heard from our 3 year old. I panicked for a couple of weeks and tried to reduce our noise levels - which looking back was ridiculous, I was trying to get DD to tiptoe around the place while nursing a newborn!

After a few occasions where they started banging the second my DD got up and started walking around, I stopped caring. We put rugs down in a few places and cracked on, obviously being mindful about noise in general but overall we are not noisy people! It was just children's living noise that they apparently couldn't cope with- playing/footsteps etc.

It all came to a head a month or so ago when they came round one day to confront me- after a full year of banging, this was the first time they had approached us. I told her I had no intention of changing our behaviour,and that if she had bothered to ever talk to us we could have discussed things like rugs etc. Anyway the long and short of it is that they have stopped banging and we are still living our lives as normal!

Our situation is slightly different to yours as we own our house, so I think both sides would be reluctant to involve the council. However in your position I absolutely would complain about their banging. It sounds like they think they can bully you into silence- don't let them!!

I would record their construction noise and play it back to them next time they complain. They've got a cheek.

Then tell them:

• You've tried to be reasonable but they've refused to meet you halfway.
• You don't want to hear from them again and if they bang on the walls again and frighten your children, you'll be contacting the police to lodge a harassment complaint.
• If they have any complaints, they can contact the council from now on not you.
• The fact they are shift workers is not your problem. You are a young family and you are using your house for normal family life.

Ideally we'd all have good neighbourly relationships, but unfortunately, with people like this, if you give an inch they'll take a mile. They will never be reasonable. The sooner you make it clear that they need to fuck off and leave you alone, the sooner you'll get some peace from them.

Terraces can be so noisy but depends on the layout. We can hear musical instruments but not tv etc or much else. Some of it you have to accept if you choose a terrace. One of our neighbours kids screams like she’s being killed in the garden which is fun but can hardly complain as she’s a kid and neighbours blank us.

Whoever posted the legal letter with key points - that’s helpful advice.

And carpet would be likely to help. If you have already raised it with your landlord when the neighbours write to them, it shows that you have tried to remedy the situation.

If they mention it to you again, you need to say ‘please stop your incessant banging. It’s waking my children up’

they are being ridiculous and so rude to keep banging on your wall like that

Yeah this.

If they come round and talk to you, just hear them out and tell them that they're hearing noise from somewhere else because your kids were in bed/out (basically what you've said here) and if they think it's too much they're welcome to go to Environmental Health about it.

Tell them their banging woke your child making them cry, and if they can't deal with the sound of a small child sleeping maybe buying a terrace wasn't the best idea?

They're being ridiculous and vindictive.

Are you a single woman on your own OP?

Sometimes (male) neighbours take it on themselves as an opportunity to intimidate someone.

Don't make your lives small to appease an arsehole.

If they continue I would call 101 for advice.

@Ivehearditbothways shes too good to live in “terrace houses” and dislike kids so I’m sure she’s in a semi detached home hopefully not making any noise for her neighbours