Blue plaques for women murdered in domestic homicide

I really do not like the idea. If they put one on every house, and I am sure some houses would have more than one depending on how far back in time this goes, then wouldn’t it send the message that domestic violence is commonplace and end up desensitising the average pedestrian? Also, most pedestrians are school age children…is this really suitable for children to be seeing as they walk to school and back? Nightmares anyone?

Yes definitely that vibe.

It is what they are known for though. It overshadows everything, forever.

If you mention my mums name to anyone who knew her then she's instantly referred to as 'the one with the nice smile who was murdered by her partner'.

At least something good might come from a high profile campaign.

Its reminding me of the witchery and murder tours in Edinburgh.

If it’s your house you can take it down. Ordinary blue plaques are only there with the owner’s consent.

Why on earth would the families want those - to display in their lounge? They are living with the horror every day - do they really need a plaque reminding them that their daughter’s killer didn’t receive anywhere near the justice he deserved?

Oh that’s not quite as bad. But still. Why not a special plaque - purple or similar?

I think it's a really good idea. The sight of just those 7 plaques together is really hard hitting. If they were papering our towns and cities? It really gives a strong sense of the scale of the issue. And the dates- it hits home about the life, often young, taken.

… it would break my heart to see a female relative’s name on a blue plaque because they were murdered. It’s a tragedy not a badge of honour.

ETA why even bring concepts of achievement into the mix of such a heart-breakingly sad event?

Yes I agree. I find domestic violence repellent and the deaths heartbreaking; but this isn’t tasteful. It’s slightly macabre to adopt a blue plaque, which already has a purpose of committing a life’s achievements to posterity, and immortalise the act of someone else by marking the spot it took place. It’s just all off key.

But not every woman would want their name widely known for that.

I know the women I know (who've experienced DV) wouldn't want that for themselves. One in particular is a very private person. I wouldn't want it either. I'm very lucky that I have a good DH but if I was murdered I wouldn't want people knowing my name for that.

Obviously some people might not mind, might even want that, but we can't know after the event because dead people can't consent.

Make the perpetrators names widely known instead. These abusers hate to be named and shamed.

Even more importantly, address the issues that stop victims leaving - so that DV can be reduced and DV murders can be prevented.

A very powerful statement and definitely gets you thinking.
I think this is totally okay, considering the victims families know about this and have given their go ahead.
Also.. that one that is dated 2002-2019 😢

It is what they are known for though, that's the point, that's what makes murder so fucking awful. Why sugar coat it? If someone close to you is murdered, that is what you think of when you remember them. That's what these men have done.

This!
It's why Clare's Law was so important. It meant there was a way to take some of that secrecy away. Abusers who'd been convicted before could be known. Victims could check if their abuser had done it before.

I think it's a bloody fantastic idea

Separately, if anyone's name should be widely and publicly known it's the perpetrators of domestic homicide.

Many absolutely hate to be "outed". They're very keen on keeping up their Mr Nice Guy public image. Even when convicted many get sympathy. We can see that in reporting - things like "neighbours said he was a lovely guy", "man pushed to the edge by wife's nagging", "he was going through a difficult mental health crisis".

I agree completely.

I know several women who've experienced DV. Thankfully none have died although there's been injuries.

One is back with her violent husband because of the social housing shortage. She was put in substandard temporary accommodation which was not safer than being with her husband. It was as bad. Homeless people are dumped in awful places and often one size fits all (so ex prisoners, including possibly abusers, housed in the same blocks as DV victims).

I appreciate the idea of these plaques is well meaning but I know from friends who've experienced DV that many women wouldn't want their name publicly known like that.

The money for these plaques would be better spent on better support for victims - social housing, supportive benefits system etc, as that's what will reduce DV and domestic homicides. (Obviously though if the family of a murdered victim chooses to use their own money for a memorial - plaque or otherwise, that's absolutely their choice).

I actually think it would be a very powerful campaign if paper plaques were put up at every house of a murdered woman for one day. I know it couldn't actually happen for a number of reasons.

The families of the murdered women have given permission. The plaques are only temporary and will be given to the families afterwards.

I imagine the properties who agreed either are the murdered women's families who feel obliged and rightly want to campaign for (better) justice or people who feel pressured and too embarrassed to refuse. A smaller concern is weirdos who might make a tour out of it 'murdered women crawl' but you could argue if someone has a sick fascination they might be the type to purposefully buy, rent, live or hang out around murder scenes anyway. There are really sick people like we saw of the Grenfell fire, the awful gathering with a cardboard model of Grenfell set on a bonfire. There are people like this so I feel the plaque will draw more damage and disrespect by and for the wrong audience. It will damage and hurt the community.

Exactly

Those plaques are hard fought to honour people with amazing achievements

This is making someone's life just about the murder and just makes them a perpetual victim

Plus, you'll start getting morbid "tours" of them knowing people...

If they haven't given consent for this, then I don't agree with it.

To add, using the iconic blue plaque to catch eyes people who are expecting to read something pleasant and interesting about a famous person read something so awful, I for example purposefully avoid reading and hearing awful news because I can't do fuck all about it and it ruins my day. I think aggressive campaign and advertising punishes the wrong audience, do something like that outside of number 10 or where big bosses see it, why do we have to think about this. I can't change the laws or bring her back. Local MP won't do fuck all about anything. Why do I have to see this?