Husband is buying a car when I don't think he should.

If he can unilaterally buy a car, then maybe you can unilaterally sell the other one. And maybe pocket the money or put it towards a divorce.

Because then he'd get to drive the big, flashy one to impress people and you clatter around in the Corsa with the kids and dog whilst he's off out being impressive around others (side order of 'God no, I'm not having them in my car!').

We don’t need 2 and only had 1 for a year but we are back up to 2 and I do prefer it .

So I assume he's expecting me to take over costs for one

Well, this is the question to ask.

I have to say that we have been a two car household ever since we got together (25+ years) but found that really we just don’t need the other one as since Covid, DH is WFH. Not paying out for two lots of insurance, tax, MOT, repairs and tyres has been really useful!

As the children get older a second car will get more useful, then if one child has an activity, party or something the other parent can still take the other child somewhere or get stuff done.

We know one family with one car but they don't do much independently (neither parent goes out alone much, and they're the kind to show up at a kids party with the whole family)

Part-ex would be silly, but it's still a £1500 car even if it's got 100k on it.

We actually have three cars between two of us, but we're both petrolheads...and, as it happens, that Corsa is 7 years newer than any of ours :D

I couldn't stand not having 2 cars. And if dh was heading away for 3/4 days and leaving me carless l would be looking at buying another. This is what brought it to a head. Things have changed since you learnt to drive. Who decided you could go off with the car for so long?
I am with dh here.

I’m with you OP. Seems very wasteful to run two cars. I see my neighbours with two cars and they very rarely use them both at the same time.

I’m not sure there’s much point to part-ex an old beaten up Corsa, or if you’d even be able to. Probably best flogging it cheap or scrapping.

He’s going to be all week without a car because you’re away. I can see why he wants a second. But we’re a petrolhead family with a bit of a fleet, and the idea of sharing one car is somewhat alien to me.

Leaving aside that I wouldn't have entertained a partner for 9 years who couldn't drive (for no good reason and assuming you don't live in London) YABVU. He might have had his own car the whole of his adult life and suddenly you want to make it unavailable to him? Having an extra driver in the family should lighten his load not add to it.

That seems rather controlling. He shouldn’t be allowed out and about like a grown adult as he has done in the past, unless it accords with the OP’s views on family/kids needs. If the roles were reversed, there’d be uproar and the OP would be told to call Women’s Aid.

If he can afford it and wants to spend his own money on a second car for what is now a two driver household, then why not?

It's unreasonable not to consider your opinion, but totally reasonable to want two cars. Especially as you have two DCs. I would find it really annoying not having two.

If, on the other hand, he's paying for both cars yet she's getting to drive one for free (assumed from her statement that she won't pay for a car) - and the other is paid for by his business - why does she get a veto?

You're not being irrational

It's a joint decision, if you're not on board he definitely would be wrong to buy it

I understand how you feel. If you've managed with one car for ten years then why change things now?

Because OP never drove until a year ago @SallyWD, so they didn't need two cars?

You might have managed with one car before now (and mostly one driver as you only passed your test last year) but what about going forward?

Your kids are growing up and with two drivers in the family, it makes sense to have a car per adult so that you can split all the inevitable lifts and transporting you'll be doing.

I also wouldn't be happy if DH took our only car and left me without all week, as a one off or not.

I understand how you feel. If you've managed with one car for ten years then why change things now?
We're a one car family. Always have been and it's absolutely fine. We either do stuff together or I manage fine without a car if he's using it. I walk everywhere. I walk to work, to the shops. I simply never need the car when he's using it.
I'd be abboyed if DH just bought another car because to me the money cam be used better elsewhere.

So I assume he's expecting me to take over costs for one

Obviously this is the first thing you need to clarify. And make it clear that you won't be!

i love how instantly pp's are saying he only wants a 2nd car becuase he wants to have his own jaunts out etc implying he only wants the car so he can cheat.. or that he can shirk his responsibility as a parent and a father???

he's been the only driver for 10 years, the OP can now drive, the OP is taking the car for something leaving him with no transport.. he probably feels like he has had his wings clipped.

i bet if a man posted this.. the replies with 'she needs her independance, why are you not supporting her?'

damaned if you do and damned if you don't!

I'm team dh here. He has always had his own car and now you have learned to drive, you haven't got your own and are using his. I don't think he has gone about this the best way, but I can see why he does want two cars.

Why don't you see in a few months how much the corsa gets used once there is a second car that is more suited to a family? You can always sell it later if it's a waste. You won't get much for a 10 year old hatchback anyway, so it won't make much difference to the purchase price of you don't part exchange.

We couldn't cope without 2 cars 🤷🏽‍♀️

I don't know anyone who shares a car with their spouse tbh, I've been thinking about it for a few minutes

When my children are 17 they'll have their own cars too.. I'm not sharing my car lol

So for almost a decade he had his own car which he used for whatever he wanted, whenever he wanted, around family commitments? Now you can drive and you share his car? I can see his point.

This is what we did - until DS1 passed his test. We only had one car for years. Occasionally we used a taxi - but often walked or used the bus. A second car is expensive if you don’t need one 99 per cent of the time.

I still don’t see the issue. My husband’s car would be our family one. Mine is just mine.

That makes sense. It's not the same situation as the OP describes. She doesn't really want his&hers cars, just one sensible family one.