Husband is buying a car when I don't think he should.

Since when was a haircut a luxury?

So, by the same token, having one or more children is a ‘luxury’, ditto central heating, fast broadband etc. None of these are a need, just a want. A luxury perhaps.

I’ve always had my own car and I’d find it totally stifling not having my own car to use as I please. I cycle to work most days as I’m not lazy but it’s reassuring to know it’s there if I wish to drive in.

In this case the OP feels she is the sole arbiter of what is, and what isn’t, necessary. This sounds controlling to me. Her DH could easily have turned it all round and told her to get her own car now she can drive (and pay for it with her own earnings). Instead, he has adapted to the new circumstances by proposing to buy another car so he continues to have the choice and freedom to drive when he wants to. If done with his own earnings, no worries…

An average of 1.23 doesn’t mean most people have two cars.

My DHs parents have 2 cars I’ve just remembered but I don’t know anyone else personally who has two cars and even looking at the cars up my road on people’s drives (and I live on a long road) the majority have one car.

But regardless, even if most people in the U.K. did run two cars, it’s still a luxury spend unless you have no choice because of work. If you are doing it just because you prefer it then that’s the definition of unnecessary and luxury. Cars are expensive and most people do not NEED two cars. Most people don’t even need one. And you certainly don’t need to latest new car on a PCP.

The posts to the country really demonstrate how the whole country has had a huge lifestyle creep and think things like two cars, haircuts, beauty treatments, regular takeout coffees and eating out or takeaways, etc etc etc are all “the norm” and so mean they are longer luxuries. This isn’t correct.

I expect his response would be “Fine”. Mine would be.

Now you can drive, the chances are that the pattern of your life will change.
a second car is a good idea if you can afford it.
He clearly thinks you can. That’s what needs to be discussed.
Until then, you are just sounding a little stubborn and trying to stop him from doing something he really wants to do (and has maybe been waiting for for a long time, while you weren’t able to drive.)

Tell him you will not be paying out for a second car ... tax, insurance etc etc etc

This!!

OP clearly doesn't like cars all that much other than for their usefulness. Quite a lot of people do like driving a nicer car, now its a year down the line i can 100% see where he is coming from.

I'd split the budget, upgrade the Corsa and still have enough left for a car he wants too.

Absolutely 4 cars is a luxury - 2 of the cars are hobby cars for events.

But 2 cars is the norm - as people have pointed out with national stats outside of London.

It wouldn't be possible to live our lives, even if getting to work wasnt a factor, with just one car.

Honestly i don't know any couple running just one car, and i've thought very hard about it!

The Corsa will probably die very soon and the problem will be solved.

I think to just decide without discussing it isn't fair, I'd be wondering why he needs the second car all of a sudden ? Having said that I don't think it's unreasonable to have a car each I couldn't share a car with my OH I value the independence it gives me too much

Exactly @Foxblue. Those posters saying that it's the norm to have 2 cars or it's life limiting to share a car aren't relevant to the OPs circumstances. They don't drive to work like many people do and when they go out at the weekend they often do this without using the car.

So it's not like they're even inconvenienced by using public transport/walking - they're already doing it by choice presumably as quicker/easier than driving and having to find a parking space and pay for parking. So a second car is likely to be a significant expense for little benefit, especially as they'll also have the option of occasional taxis or hire cars for far less than the cost of buying and running a second car.

This approach is one way to get an invitation to take a long walk off a short pier, I suppose!

If he is accustomed to having the use of a car and can afford it, he should be free to do what he wants. As for keeping it clean and shiny, people do often have different standards in that regard.

You also forget he has spent years ferrying the kids (and OP) about and so it is fair for the OP to take her turn. What’s good for the goose, etc.

I would say that as you rarely use the car 5 days out of 7, and have seemed to have coped with that absolutely fine, and it would make things tight financially (I'm still not clear if this means he expects you to take over 100% of the running costs of the old car) then surely this is a no brainer- it's an incredible amount of money to spend for the occasional plan clash at the weekend???

IMO one decent car is a very fair compromise.

he clearly wants a new shiny toy all to himself… that’s cool but he needs to pick something that doesn’t cost £20k - £50k plus.

💯 sell the corsa… there is NO way I’d like myself get shafted like this. Kids seats will be in your (shitty) car so you ferry them everywhere while we swans about is his fun-mobile that can’t get messy and you aren’t even insured on….

upgrading the car yes…
if he insists on 2 the new one would be suitable for me to be insured on and would be “mine and the kids” and he gets the corsa.
And all cars are joint expenses.

The need for a second car will depend a lot on your location, lifestyle, etc. but it sounds like you don't need another car from your description, and if I were in your position I would find it a major waste of money and would be seriously unhappy about it.

But 30% of all households are people living alone. So...of the remainder, half of them have more than one car.

No, the national norm is to have one car: For every household that has two cars, there are three households that have only one car.

Also, according to the government's travel survey, only 1/3 of households in England have access to two or more cars.

I might be going against ifwstylthe grain of advice here but I don't think you're being unreasonable at all. You'd be best placed to know if your lifestyle requires 2 cars and if it doesn't then there is no need for a second car. You sound logical and reasonable so it sounds like if one day down the line there was a need for two cars you'd be open to that discussion but if now you don't then there's simply no need to have a second car just because. It's expensive, a will significantly impact family finances.
When I was married our circumstances changed (I started working from home, our son got Into a school walkable from home etc) and we realised that the second car was sat on the drive for 99 per cent of the time doing nothing so we got rid.
There may be an argument for upgrading your current car but quite honestly if you're happy with it and it's not costing you much, I'd stick with the addage, of if it ain't broke then don't fix it. Stick money in a pot for the day when you need to replace it.
This screams to me like your husband has an ulterior motive for wanting a second car and is trying to give you silly reasons that simply don't make sense.
Unless you're millionaires and have no financial concerns, I can't see why any one would unnecessarily take on a huge extra monthly cost unless there's a hidden reason he's not sharing.
I'd be pinning him down for a serious conversation OP and if you're not satisfied with the answer I'd be drawing some clear boundaries about the situation.

You’ve just learnt to drive. I can absolutely see why he now thinks it’s a good idea to have 2 cars.
I was the only driver in our house for a while and trust me it’s DRAINING. It was lovely on me as it was on DP when he passed his test and got his own car. It was a luxury and we both felt far free-er, than having to ask who was going where when, and my life was dictated around when he needed to go somewhere.

he probably has this free feeling now also. I don’t blame him. We would really struggle now with one car, and we aren’t financially very well off

Yes two cars is a luxury.

I really don't think it is - I know very few households with only one car - and if they do, it's because there's only one driver. DH and I couldn't do our jobs without two cars.

In 2022 the average household in England had 1.23 cars, higher if you exclude London. So the national norm is to have more than one car.

Yes two cars is a luxury. I don’t know anyone with two cars and we are relatively comfortable. Comparing yourself just to people you know then assuming that is the norm and therefore not luxury is a.false comparison. Have you worked out how much it costs you to run 4 cars? Surely you are aware this would not be affordable for the majority of people, and for others they would see this is unnecessary and would want to spend their money eisewhere. We live rurally and manage very well with one car, it’s never a problem. I have a life away from him too but that’s perfectly possible to do with the one car! You may like having four cars. That doesn’t make it a necessity or the norm or somehow not a luxury!

Very few people need two cars??

I have a life away from my partner too, we have 4 cars.

2 car house holds is the standard, definitely not luxury, i dont know anybody that shares cars.

i'd feel extremely trapped with just one car, in fact, i couldnt live my lovely life if we did

Vary few people need two cars (an example would be where one person has to drive to work leaving the other person at home and without a car all week)

Or an example being all the couples where both people need a car to drive work…

This thread! We've always had one car and managed just fine. Vary few people need two cars (an example would be where one person has to drive to work leaving the other person at home and without a car all week). And running cars is really really expensive so unless you are flush and don't need the money for other things it's a luxury. I can't quite believe people are saying it's not a luxury, and others reasoning for having two cars that they just don't want to share their car?!?