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Original poster

Men with boats cheat

369 replies

Boatsandcoats · 15/09/2024 21:54

The subject says it all!

I’ve long believed that men only buy boats to use them as floating love shacks. My friend thinks I’m being ridiculous and says boats are just a great lifestyle choice. Recently, she told me her husband is thinking of buying a boat, and I couldn’t help but give her that look! She insists he’d never cheat, but in my experience, every man I’ve known who had a boat wasn’t exactly faithful.

Honestly, if my husband bought one, I might even consider it grounds for divorce!

So, am I being unreasonable? Can men own boats without it leading to adultery, or am I totally right to be suspicious? Should men with boats just wear a t-shirt that says, "Don’t trust me?"

(For the record, this doesn’t apply to fishermen making a living or people who live on boats!)

OP posts:
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Genevieva · 16/09/2024 21:07

Weird thread. In my family everyone sails. Our kids grew up in boats. My husband spends all his time tinkering with boats. He has 5. They were all bought in a poor state and he has done them up. We have participated in races as a family. My eldest child is qualifying as a sailing instructor. Sailors are far too interested in fixing boats and sailing them to have time for cavorting with other women.

Original poster
Boatsandcoats · 16/09/2024 21:06

CurlewKate · 16/09/2024 09:01

I live on a boat. Does that mean dp and I are both having affairs?

Read the original post in full

OP posts:
Original poster
Boatsandcoats · 16/09/2024 21:01

YellowComb · 16/09/2024 08:47

My husband seems to spend a lot of time in Tesco. There's a woman on the till. Should I be worried?

No you are fine but if he goes to Sainsbury's or Spar you are in trouble

OP posts:
Original poster
Boatsandcoats · 16/09/2024 20:54

zaxxon · 16/09/2024 08:11

It's the ones with submarines that you really have to watch out for

Doesn't everyone love a man who goes down?

OP posts:
Original poster
Boatsandcoats · 16/09/2024 20:51

ThePrologue · 16/09/2024 06:25

Is that the equivalent of a blow-up doll?!

Show quote history

YES 😂

OP posts:
Original poster
Boatsandcoats · 16/09/2024 20:49

Webbymeister · 16/09/2024 06:19

No but all pilots are shaggers. Even the ones you think are not

You can create that post I suspect less people will be examining their husbands phones tonight with that info though!

OP posts:
Original poster
Boatsandcoats · 16/09/2024 20:48

Toastghost · 16/09/2024 05:56

I’m awake at 5.55 reading about men with boats. Thanks for the information op.

It was very early wasn't it! Has the info enriched your day?

OP posts:
1dayatatime · 16/09/2024 20:15

@murphys

"😂 go out check out canoeing on Urban Dictionary"

Oh dear! Just googled it and I now feel like I have lived a sheltered life...

BeyondSmoake · 16/09/2024 20:00

...because of the implication?

TunnocksOrDeath · 16/09/2024 19:54

My husband owns a single scull.
Even if he could find anyone who didn’t mind the draught and has sufficiently good balance to use it as a “floating love shack” they’d probably both get arrested for gross indecency anyway.

I think I’m probably alright with this one.

LakieLady · 16/09/2024 19:31

DadJoke · 15/09/2024 22:25

It’s the people with beach huts you really can’t trust.

A friend of mine caught his wife in flagrante delicto in a beach hut she'd rented!

We all worked for the same local authority and it was the talk of the town hall for a couple of weeks.

randomchap · 16/09/2024 19:25

The only bloke with a boat I know is always taking his wife and kids away on it. I don't think I've ever heard of him going out on it without at least one member of his family.

They all seem to love it

RhubarbBarBarber · 16/09/2024 19:21

justasking111 · 15/09/2024 22:23

I remember the coast guard saying that the hanky panky on deck on hot summer days was common. They do have excellent binoculars 😀

gasp
lowers binoculars
That's NOT a snorkel!

Mathsbabe · 16/09/2024 14:34

We have a boat but my DH doesn't generally go to it on his own except when he's working on it. When he's working on it he drops tools all over the place so not enough clear space for any fun.

justasking111 · 16/09/2024 13:45

Striebel · 16/09/2024 12:22

I guess people who can afford to have a boat (large enough to be used as a loveshack) as a hobby probably have plenty of money and plenty of time and that maybe makes cheating easier?

I don't know a single person who owns a boat so if I agree with you it's purely based on the reasoning above.

Our retired GP friend has just spent £250k on a motor boat which isn't shaggable in to be honest.

Striebel · 16/09/2024 12:22

I guess people who can afford to have a boat (large enough to be used as a loveshack) as a hobby probably have plenty of money and plenty of time and that maybe makes cheating easier?

I don't know a single person who owns a boat so if I agree with you it's purely based on the reasoning above.

blueshoes · 16/09/2024 12:18

GasPanic · 16/09/2024 11:49

There are probably cheaper ways of doing it than buying a boat.

Yes, a tent but it won't have the same cache.

Mintgum · 16/09/2024 12:11

What a load of rubbish.

ErrolTheDragon · 16/09/2024 11:50

Puts a whole new perspective on men who say their boat is for fishing the Norfolk Broads.

GasPanic · 16/09/2024 11:49

There are probably cheaper ways of doing it than buying a boat.

bifurCAT · 16/09/2024 11:49

Could we look at the other side of this and say "women are turned on by men with boats"?

Your average man might not be getting attention and the chance to cheat, but throwing a boat into the mix and suddenly he has options???

Caroparo52 · 16/09/2024 11:46

No idea where you are coming from here. Could dwife not go on boat too?

Rummly · 16/09/2024 11:43

Grumpyoldpersonwithcats · 16/09/2024 11:34

Time to quietly confess.

I'm a married man with a boat 😲. (A boat came with the house.)
Don't think it would ever be a cheating enabler though - it's not exactly a gin palace and I suspect any rumpy-pumpy would be both rather uncomfortable and very visible 🤣

Hmmm. That is clearly a Water Sprite XL5050. They are well known for having concealed inflatable bags that can expand to create a self-contained 12 berth yacht, with helipad and bar.

A bit like Chitty Chitty Bang Bang (fnarrr) could change.

Rubydoobydoobydoo · 16/09/2024 11:42

@justasking111 Exactly. You need something approaching a £million vessel if you want to be able to sit up without concussing yourself and without having to negotiate a 2'6" single berth with a high wooden side so you don't fall out. And where do you shag in a small boat? If you're moored in a marina, someone's going to notice the activity — because in a small boat enthusiastic shagging will be heard and the boat'll be rocking. And if you're moored out in the open sea your options will be limited because the weather and possibly the tide will need to be just right. Too rough or windy and you could slip anchor while doing the deed — and it would obviously rule out anyone inclined to seasickness.

Grumpyoldpersonwithcats · 16/09/2024 11:34

Time to quietly confess.

I'm a married man with a boat 😲. (A boat came with the house.)
Don't think it would ever be a cheating enabler though - it's not exactly a gin palace and I suspect any rumpy-pumpy would be both rather uncomfortable and very visible 🤣

Men with boats cheat