Fiancé has agreed to be a Guarantor - I’m not happy

Had he not be living with you, then I’d be cross, but I would consider it his money and his risk (and perhaps question my financial future with him, but at least you weren’t tied to him financially).

However, he lives with you so this should be a joint decision, especially as he doesn’t have savings, and the do has just gone self employed. You don’t upsize them, but when you are established! It things go tits up, and dp ends up paying, then this indirectly affect you, as you’ll be paying all the bills etc. iDon’t know how old you are, but this could hinder any plans fir children, holidays, new cars etc.

Wow. You very clearly don’t understand the financial implications of acting as a guarantor. He can’t ‘volunteer’ OP - she would have to sign an agreement. And if l were your DH l would be concerned that you would consider acting as a guarantor without his agreement or even knowledge, given that it could substantially affect any joint finances/property and potentially impact any mortgage/remortgage decision.

workworkbloodywork · Today 20:54

"We do live together in a property that I have a mortgage on."

Good news, so YOUR home isn't at risk then. 😊

If you stay with him, it would be wise to ensure you aren't financially linked to him. That way, if he does take a hit due to guaranteeing rent for someone who doesn't pay, at least your own credit won't be directly impacted.

Martin Lewis explains how to do that here (see items 7 and 8): https://www.moneysavingexpert.com/loans/credit-rating-credit-score/#needtoknow2

Of course, if you're with someone who ends up lumbered with a big debt, you'll still be affected indirectly.

People should just say no. Ive said this on student/uni threads before and its like Im suggesting people should cut their kids arms off or something

Say no, young ADULT rents a bedsit or room share or equivalent that doesnt need a guarantor. End of story

>We do live together in a property that I have a mortgage on.

So how has he done this? As far as I am aware, you have to be a home owner to be a guarantor and they take it very seriously. They even asked for my sister’s car reg when she did it for me some 20 odd years ago.

If he has signed the papers saying he owns the house with you, he is committing fraud, surely?

I am sorry, but there is no way I would take a risk for someone else’s sister. You are the one taking the risk of losing your home.

Professional guarantor services are available. Tell him to retract it and suggest she uses one of those.

Well this is it you see. Annoyingly, many parents of University students get asked to be guarantor for their (young adult) children, by the letting agents (that their children are getting their house from, for years 2 and 3 of university.

The parents are often jointly and severally liable for any rent their DC doesn't pay/can't pay, and can be expected to pay rent for any of the other 3 or 4 students too - if they don't pay! And also, any expenses for damage to the property.

It is grossly unfair and wrong to expect parents of University students to sign to be a guarantor, as so many things can go wrong, and they can end up being chased for 1000s and 1000s of pounds.

i agree and he doesnt even own the house

i agree and he doesnt even own the house

the fact he has supported family members financially frequently in the past both equally made me adore how supportive he is of those around him but also concerned for our financial security in the future

That's the crux of it, isn't it? His generosity and loyalty are very attractive traits. At the same time, if he is too generous then your future could be jeopardised.

It's a difficult one.

people are so naive family woulnt not pay-yes it happens the baliffs will be instructed after so much arrears then he'll have to pay it or lose his own belongings

has he put own your house as reference for a credit chek-it will come bak on you either way as he lives there

This all day. Im astounded at how little people understand about this

And the constant questioning of the poster who said she wouldnt do it for her children, no neither would I. You need to be able to throw away that money, for the entire rental period, without qualm, to take the risk

And the risk might never come to fruition, but you dont know that.

And as for the poster who put her mother down but then reckons theres no rental period so all was well, words fail me.

Can he afford to do it?

Sorry, but so what? What is wrong with not wanting to be a guarantor for your children?

It's no good any parent agreeing to be guarantor for their children, if said parent can't afford to pay the rent or loan or debts of that child. (Should that child be unable or unwilling to pay up.)

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I think it’s quite concerning that so many posters here seem to be so unaware of the financial ramifications of acting as a guarantor. And it seems to be those very posters who are telling the OP she’s unreasonable to object and it’ll all be fine. The risks of acting as guarantor aside, it also doesn’t seem to have registered with some posters that this was a serious financial commitment he made alone and without discussion, despite the fact that he doesn’t have the means to cover any losses. Huge red flag, both for financial irresponsibility and for his willingness to make unilateral decisions with absolutely no consideration for the potential impact on his partner.

OP have you checked that he hasn't actually used you as well? I would want to see a copy of whatever he has signed. Why did they need 2 guarantors initially but then only 1 was able to. Don't trust blindly.

Me neither

What????

The fact that they need a guarantor in the first place would suggest they are not great with money….they are not first time renters ……and BIL has recently started a new business which is always risky

What your DF plan long-term if your relationship ends? He's living in your home right now but what happens if you split, can he afford his and sister's rental cost? Is your home protected legally right now, or had he got a legal interest? I would be protecting myself if he's determined to make financial decisions that impact both of you.

It will affect any harmonious future family relationship if they default on their rent and he's called upon to pay it. It's nice that he's been able to help out family members previously, but on this occasion he should have swiftly said "No, I'm sorry, that's a potentially huge commitment and I can't afford to take the risk."

My daughter's boyfriend needed a guarantor when they rented (my dd was fine and had good credit) , he asked me and I said no. After much persuasion his mother agreed ( she obviously knew what he was like) and after 3 months he disappeared leaving my daughter. His mother was livid and asked if I could help financially, I again said no. It's all very good being a guarantor when everything is going well, but if it goes tits up it can all turn very unpleasant.

@workworkbloodywork has DF said you’ll both be guarantors or has he just said he will be? They’re very different scenarios.

If he’s volunteered you that’s massively out of order. But if he’s made that decision on his own part for his sibling you’re being very controlling to suggest you need to approve it. I wouldn’t even ask my DH if my sibling needed this let alone expect to need his permission.

I would do this for my sibling as long as they were good with money. I have used a guarantor in the past and always paid my rent on time. Your getting a lot of nightmare situations but it seems it may be to late now.

But could you afford to cover his unpaid rent, it that happened? If you could then no problem…..if not it could be a case of you kicked out of your home ….when they come knocking for their money and you can’t pay.
and no one’s homeless here…..the family member just wants a bigger place