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AIBU?

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Original poster

Aibu to think some parents can't accept their child is a average?!

162 replies

Chasingshadowss · 15/09/2024 19:01

Just from listening to some parents at the school gates & activities.. It seems certain parents can't accept their child is normal or average..
If they are not over achieving it's the schools fault, teachers fault, other parents faults, coaches fault.. It's draining.
Also some parents who might be very high achievers themselves just expect their child should be the same as them & point the finger if not..
What's wrong with average?

OP posts:
memebuster · 15/09/2024 19:30

having had a bright child who was phenomenally let down by school in the last year of primary I would say it works both ways.

SausageinaBun · 15/09/2024 19:28

I'd be more concerned that there are children who are not average, but are achieving at an average level and no one notices. Schools seem really content with average.

wafflesmgee · 15/09/2024 19:28

I think parents often do this to hide their own guilt, they perceive it is because they themselves don't do enough with their kids to push them but don't want to accept that. E.g. they don't listen to their child read for 5 mins a day and then don't want to accept responsibility, so hire a tutor and still don't listen to their child read every day.
It's also their own insecurities and competitiveness.
I think it's important to value all things children have to offer, but equally you do need to ensure your child tries their hardest. For me, if I know they have then the actual result is unimportant. In contrast, I'm wary of parents to aren't pushy at all e.g. "as long as they're happy" jn that new learning always feels hard and children need to build resilience, sometimes children of these parents give up straight away and miss out on the satisfaction of trying their hardest.
So, a bit of both from my standpoint.

FuzzyDiva · 15/09/2024 19:24

We have some parents like this at school and I really feel sorry for their children because no matter what they do, it never impresses their parents because it’s always the least that they expect.

Original poster
Chasingshadowss · 15/09/2024 19:20

Genevieva · 15/09/2024 19:18

I had a primary school teach who made every child feel special for something . They might have been kind, creative, good at sharing, diligent or any number of other things. She made a point of observing and praising every child for something so that, even if they struggled in some aspects of school life, they felt valued. It taught me a lot. Average or not, every child has a characteristic worthy of praise and building them up does wonders for helping them achieve more generally. Try not to let these parents rile you.

She sounds amazing & that is powerful that you still remember her traits.

OP posts:
Original poster
Chasingshadowss · 15/09/2024 19:19

Flextime · 15/09/2024 19:12

I think no one thinks they are average OP. I think I’m average or below in most things now , despite being top set at school etc . I want my own children to be happy and have good self esteem . For me that is most important .

Edited

Exactly @Flextime it hinders confidence to hear parents blaming schools, teachers.. even other children having the audacity to have tutors.
If parents accept the child they have they would be happy & confident regardless.. Not every child is going to be the next Einstein or Keely Hodgkinson & that's completely OK. What's not OK is blaming everyone surrounding the child for them not meeting the parents expectations

OP posts:
Genevieva · 15/09/2024 19:18

I had a primary school teach who made every child feel special for something . They might have been kind, creative, good at sharing, diligent or any number of other things. She made a point of observing and praising every child for something so that, even if they struggled in some aspects of school life, they felt valued. It taught me a lot. Average or not, every child has a characteristic worthy of praise and building them up does wonders for helping them achieve more generally. Try not to let these parents rile you.

Flextime · 15/09/2024 19:18

Chasingshadowss · 15/09/2024 19:16

@Flextime what I mean is parents giving out about teacher & school when their child doesn't get the marks they want it to get.
Badmouthing a coach as their average player wasn't picked for the first team..
An entitled attitude of "I went to Oxbrixge, Theodore is following in Mummy & Daddy's footsteps"...

Hi @Chasingshadowss
I agree . The entitlement of parents these days is incredible . It is quite frankly deluded and arrogant .

Original poster
Chasingshadowss · 15/09/2024 19:16

@Flextime what I mean is parents giving out about teacher & school when their child doesn't get the marks they want it to get.
Badmouthing a coach as their average player wasn't picked for the first team..
An entitled attitude of "I went to Oxbrixge, Theodore is following in Mummy & Daddy's footsteps"...

OP posts:
KezzaMucklowe · 15/09/2024 19:14

Yanbu. There's nothing wrong at all with being average, although I think most people excel at something.

Flextime · 15/09/2024 19:12

I think no one thinks they are average OP. I think I’m average or below in most things now , despite being top set at school etc . I want my own children to be happy and have good self esteem . For me that is most important .

Original poster
Chasingshadowss · 15/09/2024 19:10

I just think it's ludicrous carry on.

OP posts: