Husband cancelled 2 nights away because he has a cold...

Do you also test yourself for every other disease going?

Being a teacher means going into work when you're ill, and being surrounded by 30 germ machines (with little concept of personal hygiene) in a confined space, especially now that parents are told they can't keep their children off school when they're ill.

I suspect that's why I don't have any patience for someone who cancels their holiday because they have a cold. I've had to power through being at work ill, for nearly 40 years.

I don’t understand why you’d rather waste money on a hotel and have him stay in the room the majority of the time, rather than go on your own or do it a different time instead.

I’m glad your parents can use the train tickets.

I think you’re being a little mean, he can’t help feeling poorly and you just want to stay home when you’re unwell.

thehungryteacher if you are in fact a teacher, you would think you’d have the intelligence to realise that it’s really not a good idea to travel when you’re so ill!

Being at home and having plenty of access to tissues is not the same thing as being out and constantly having to blow your nose. Even worse if you run out of tissues while out and about.

And serious, OP, learn to enjoy things on your own rather than complaining about not getting to drag your sick partner around. WTH?

It depends how ill he feels. Some "colds" can make you feel terrible. I had a virus a few weeks ago, Covid test was negative but I felt awful for several days and certainly wouldn't have felt up to walking far.

Unless this is part of a pattern or there is more going on than you’ve said, I think YABU.

My exh cancelled our honeymoon because he had the sniffles. He then made a big thing of it at the reception by toasting everyone with Lemsip in a mug. Everyone felt so sorry for him and he successfully made himself the sole centre of attention for the entire wedding. I divorced him 5 years later.

I wish more people would stay home when ill to be honest instead of spreading their germs everywhere 😕

@railingsdown yep I'm upset- luckily it was an add on extra- as we went away in July. I get the logic and to be frank I would struggle with airport as feel really weary- as does he. Still better not to have a shit time and spend lots in process I guess

Gosh I’m glad my partner is more supportive than you are. If I was ill he would certainly support me to stay home if I wanted to rest.

People on here are so weird about colds. I think any kind of feeling unwell and wanting to do very little is completely fine. In fact if someone says they feel unwell ever at all, I would be full of sympathy and try my best to loop them out of everything.

I don't see why anyone would rather be home with a cold than be out enjoying their life, so if someone says they'd rather rest - or if I would rather rest - I would assume that they would get more comfort and enjoyment from that than the other thing.

Some people find all life activities "cost" them more energy and emotional labour so they have less budget to push through. My daughter is autistic and is working so hard on life all the time that a mild cold just ends up adding too much to the load and she can't tolerate going out. Lots of us adults, i suspect, have undiagnosed neurodiversity or MH issues; some people are otherwise happy and fine , a cold doesn't put them underwater. For others, it does.

Work pays the bills so I'd expect a higher threshold of tolerances of discomfort there - if you can get stuff done you should.

But a personal treat for your own enjoyment, like a party or a holiday? No way should people battle on through something that they are purely choosing to do for their own enjoyment!

You sound lovely. Why should he something he doesn’t have to which will make him feel worse just to keep you company. Imagine if a woman posted that her DH was guilting her when she’s unwell.

And there would be tons of 'LTB' replies.

But if he's feeling unwell, it's understandable.

It might only look like a sneeze to you but you can't know how he actually feels inside. I understand you're disappointed but he can't help he's feeling unwell.

I'd have gone on my own. I don't think it's reasonable to say he should struggle round for two days feeling awful. And presumably when he goes to work he will be much better as it's a could of days away 🤷🏽‍♀️ I'd guarantee if you felt shit you wouldn't want to go either and would be posting saying your husband is unreasonable and cross because you don't want to go.

He's ill, he's tried to put it off going later and has admitted he's not well enough.

All the man haters on here will of course, say he is being unreasonable for being ill. But regardless of what he has, he's not feeling well.

Stop guilt tripping the poor man. I'd be a bit disappointed but there are plenty more weekends. If I was in your situation, I'd rather rebook and have my dp feeling good so we'd enjoy our time away.

Saw your update he definitely can't be all bad then.

So you're fuming (your word) that he wouldn't travel with you and spread his cold around? Has nobody ever suggested to you that you have a selfish streak?

I wouldn't want to go away if I felt ill either nor would I want to give everyone else on the train a cold. Just one of those things, not his fault

Plenty to do and see in York to entertain yourself.
Don't cancel op have a nice break.

I cancelled a trip a few weeks ago. I had a bad cold and tested positive for Covid. If I hadn’t I still would have cancelled it. I felt awful. If he feels like shit, that is reasonable.

I rebooked for this weekend. I have strained my back so had to cancel again. I am sure my DH is disappointed. But he has just been kind and waiting on me basically, as I am more or less immobile.

Keep your thoughts to yourself and maybe act like you are empathetic even if you don’t feel it!

I don’t understand how you were ever mad, even just a bit, in the first place?! If this was the other way round, and your DH was mad at you because you’ve got a cold and don’t want to go away for a couple of days, mumsnet would be saying how horrible he is for being mad about it. Then if you said I’ve given him £100, and bought him a takeaway so he’s not too mad anymore, and paid for next weekend’ people would say why did you do that? You shouldn’t need to give him money because you’re unwell. I think you sound incredibly selfish!

So spreading your germs around for all and sundry then? Nothing to be proud of

Just read update .