To ask you to help me pick which job to take?

As you don't need the money, I don't blame you for opting for number 3. The weekends are a bit naff but your children go to their dad EOW anyway. How's it going?
Oh and lucky you for having THREE jobs to choose from!

How’s it going?

Ah, that’s the one I thought was best for you. Glad to hear it.

that is a change of mind
but less hours and less stress on your family?
thanks for the update

5 days a week is a lot for not a lot of money. Is it worth it? Is say just do the two days and wait till a better offer or better opportunities to progress/get further education comes along. Kids are still super young.

There’s a big difference between retail and finance - I don’t really think it can be a serious choice.

That salary full time is around £25k I’d guesstimate? So an entry level finance role which means you’ll have lots to learn and keep you busy but you can actually progress quite quickly if you have aptitude for the role.

However, I don’t know where you live, but part time finance roles are plentiful in many cities and I’d be surprised if you couldn’t find a similar role on a part-time basis if that’s what you actually want as a career.

Job 4.

You are clearly very employable.
You have 3 job offers.

Have you researched jobs similar to job 1 with a better commute or flexible hours?

Otherwise, I would chose job 1 with a 2/3 year commitment. After 2 years, wfh or flexi hours might be negotiatable. If not, you'll have banked the experience and may be able to get something more suitable.

Job 1 for me because of the type of work, progression opportunities and no weekends (working weekends would be a massive dealbreaker for me, personally- understand others don't feel the same or don't have a choice).

Do you think with job 1 you could put in a flexible working request after a few months to drop your hours slightly? Any chance of a day or two working from home per week?

It is a completely personal choice and everyone is different. It is was me I would choose job 3 and then try for something like job1 when my children were older.
but it sounds as though you want job1 so if so you should go for it.

It's tricky because I want to say Job 2 until Year 6 then Job 1 from Year 7.
Mainly because I know that primary requires more input (school assemblies, sports days, church services, charity fundraisers, nativity etc) and the children become more independent by year 7.

But who's to say Job 1 will come up in 2029 or OP will be offered it then?
So common sense would be: Take Job 1, see how it fits, see how sustainable it is for all and quit if it doesn't work out. Going back to retail can be Plan B.
Job 1 will only cause issues if the payback/quid pro quo is that OP is expected to pick up all the slack at weekends (housework, breakfast, organising) in return for her spouse doing childcare arrangements M-F. Also, does he WFH and if so, how will he work the 4-6 slot? (possibly earlier if no after school activity).
If the kids are happy with a snack and chilling out with music/TV/books/gaming (mine always were) then it's a non-issue. All down to how hands on you are/homework expectations/meal prep and sit-down times/bedtime imposed and how self-sufficient/cooperative your kids are.

Job 1 for the stimulation, job progression, salary and no imposition on weekends. To me it's a no brainer! I have a primary-aged child and work full time. Please don't feel guilty. I need a stimulating job for my own wellbeing and sometimes need to work later etc. but I spend a lot of quality time with my son in the evenings, weekends and holidays.

This.

While you're married, I'd plan this as though you were single so would get before and after school clubs in place and used at least once a week and speak to their Dad about what he will be taking them for over the school hols and get it in writing.

Is DH able to work from home while there are children there? I know some companies don't allow this

There's 13 weeks of school holidays. I've known parents never take holidays together because they can't cover all the holidays and need to do it alone.

School holiday clubs around here are useless and their hours are 10 till 2 or 11 till 3 which isn't ideal for a lot of parents plus they only run for 2 weeks in the summer hols

I really trust my gut feeling these days.

I used to not to.

I was offered two different jobs , a couple of years ago.

One was better paid and looked better on paper. However when I thought about it, I had a really bad feeling about it.

I ended up taking it, and leaving after six months as it was so awful.

I feel things out now and trust how I feel.

It's an option

She's already done the second one. I don't mind retail - have worked at Tesco and Marks myself - but weekend shifts impinge on family time more than a steady M-F role. The kids won't always need taking to and from in five years' time. It's all down to if their stepdad is as on board as he says he is, once he's been doing it for a while. If yes, then job 1 is the better option.
What are your pension options OP?

Personally i would go for option 2.

But what are you interested in?

Retail and finance are completely different.

I've worked in both.

They are worlds apart , as jobs go

It's a tough one for sure.

If 2 is retail, I'd go for number 1. Purely because you've more chance of being off at christmas being office based as opposed to retail.

Sounds silly but Christmas is important to me and I don't want to be that person at work who refuses to work it so I avoid jobs where I have to.

I shut my own business for Christmas week too

But...

you'll need to double-check DH is not going to resent you later. Yes, he's been a Dad to them but he doesn't have Parental Responsibility in the way you do unless he's adopted them.

Unless he counts the school runs as a no-brainer/uses it as a chance to get his steps in or pick up a brew. It comes down to what the routines are and if Job 1 has family-friendly policies for when/if he cannot take the reins.

I'd be looking at local wrap around care/school breakfast and after-school clubs and holiday clubs too, to give you some more flexibility except he'd need to sort getting them to the latter as well if their biological Dad won't ever step up.

OP I've been in your shoes. Agonising over decisions.

You can list pros and cons endlessly and drive yourself mad.

My advice to you is visualise yourself in each of these Jobs. Imagine the scene like you are already there. You're in the office.

Which scenario do you feel happier in , when you think about It.

Then trust your gut feeling!

Job 1

Job 2 looks better to me

No commute.

You have a full day off each week

Are jobs 1 and 2 the same type of job - what's the actual role?

28 days holiday isn't bad for job 1. Just to check, is that on top of bank holidays, or is it bank holidays + 20, ie the legal minimum?

You do need to think about school holidays. Will their father be able to step up, eg take them away for a week or two? Are there grandparents they could visit or friends you could do a swap with. Or would they thrive in a daily summer camp for a week? Could you take an additional week or two of unpaid parental leave each year?

I'd go for job 1 I think though. Best not to put all your family's financial eggs in one basket, and build your own financial resilience - as long as DH is genuinely happy to step up with childcare.