to be expected to have grandchild overnight every week.

I just came on to say you sound lovey, your family are very lucky to have you. Once a week is taking advantage 💐

My advice would be to nip this in the bud now OP. Imagine when you're 5 years older, haven't had a week 'off' in 5 years, there are 3 more siblings, and your eldest grandkids are so used to 'grandmas on a Saturday' that there is added guilt about 'letting them down' when you say no. I'd be busy booking some stuff in, so that it gradually goes down to once a month for each. Book in some friends, get 'gifted' some tickets for something, arrange to look after your other grandkid.

Her expectations aren’t your obligations.

She's taking the Mick. My in laws babysit regularly (to support us working only a couple of hours) but my oldest has stayed once at their house and my youngest never

If you are still working it pretty cheeky for you to be babysitting all night every week. Presumably they chose to have a baby? They need to learn that life changes and things such as a going out regularly does pause for a bit. Most 9 month olds aren't sleeping through either, ours did but I still wouldn't expect my parents to take them overnight every single week at that age.

Why does she need a night out/day off once a week?
YANBU, once every few weeks would be so generous.

I think once a week is too much . I wouldn’t like to do it as I work full time also . You are not unkind if you tell the truth and say it is too much for you which it probably is and remember ,that you are not ‘expected’ to do anything.

If you are up for it just say once a month or once every 2 months. Set you boundaries from the beginning. As they get older that might change. But, these are babies.

I find the posters comments about your son a bit strange, if you’re like me and you get on well with your DIL in a pleasant easy way there is no need for his input. I do find some comments odd on here!
Putting that aside, yes I think you should just nicely say you’d like to share the care of both grandchildren either one day a week or a fortnight whichever suits you. I’ve looked after all my grandchildren from young babies and now have a close relationship with them all even though they’re now adults.

As an un-retired grandparent that’s huge for you to take on and very generous. Totally understand if you’re concerned about setting boundaries then not seeing DGC but she surely will understand if you calm it down

It's not normal to be offloading your baby at such a young age one weekly basis regardless of it's to a grand parent. You need to nip that in the bud now! Your DIL and son should not have had a child if they don't want to look after them

Gosh thats so little for a baby to be away from mum & dad overnight every week

Nip it in the bud. Weekly sleepovers are waaaaay too much, especially for a small baby. Agree to once in a while but maybe offer to see them both more during day instead.

You also need days off too!

How about getting your daughter to 'book' in a date in advance and when your DIL asks you can tell her you are already booked for that date.

Quite a few of my friends do this. Not always to go out drinking but I was quite surprised by how many had someone available every week to take them over night. I have one friend who has the MIL take him one night per week and her own mum another night (plus the full day before and after). We are yet to get a night out and we’re over a year into the second baby 😂 Even if we had the help I wouldn’t want them away every week though

I don’t find it so shocking that a GP would have their grandchildren once a week. My parents did for me when I had DS1, as I was a teenage parent. They didn’t have DS2 and DD much at all, never overnight but we lived 250 miles away by then. I would probably have a GC every week if asked, but it can be a little much I’m sure for many people. I work full time but would do it on a Friday evening perhaps then the whole weekend isn’t gone.

But absolutely do say if it’s getting too much. Does your DD want you to have her child overnight yet? Maybe have a chat with her and let her know you’re happy to have her DC anytime so ask her to let you know so you’re not already booked up with the other DC. Worth having a chat with your son is it’s getting too much having their child every week. It does seem a lot for a married couple to be going out every week when they are settled and have a child. Maybe once a fortnight or once a month is more appropriate.

Speak to your son about it.

Just say you'll alternate weeks.

By the way, your DD and DIL are so lucky! My parents and in laws are all great but they don't take my kids over night at all!! Even an evenings babysitting is a big deal!!

Unless you're prepared to just carry on as you have been then you need to raise it with your son (who is just as cheeky) and your dil to make changes. But please don't become a martyr like so many grandparents on here. You're also not doing them any favours long term, they need to be forced to 'get on with it'in raising their own child rather than going out boozing weekly which isn't very appropriate behaviour for new parents.

I’d say it’s pretty unusual for a GP to look after babies at that age. I breast fed / am breast feeding so it’s not really an option but even once I’d stopped I didn’t feel comfortable asking my mum to look after my LB over night until he was 2. I worried he’d keep her up all night! Your DIL and DS are lucky you are doing any over nights, just tell them what you’re happy with.

I think that is very often to have a grandchild to stay over at such a young age. You are quite within your rights to say no it make it clear once a month/8 weeks or whatever you are comfortable with.

You need to say no occasionally; if it's a very regular thing to have your grandchild once a week it will become an expectation rather than a bonus.