AIBU to not let DS16 go on a fishing trip

Agreed. And what if something happens on the trip and he’s too ‘embarrassed’ to ask for help?

I’m thinking about that group of boys in Wales whose parents (at least some) thought they were going with a parent.

But gold star to the parent whose 16 year olds don’t even ask for permission!

@CalmDownKenneth I don’t think the issue should be about a ten minute walk at 4am or the fact that he is 16. I voted YANBU because a. if he is comfortable enough to go away on a fishing trip with these people then I don’t see why he wouldn’t be comfortable with asking them to pick him up (especially as they will be driving past the house anyway). b. He is unwilling to give you any contact details or even let you know where they live. Why not? c. I’d be concerned that the fishing trip was a cover for something else that is risky etc.

He is 16 but he is a teenager that still needs guidance from his parents. I think you are doing the right thing.

Being able to walk 10 mins without mummy controlling at 16 is also an important life skill

Why haven't you got their contact details when your son will be spending the weekend with them, away from home???? Your son must have them so ask him. Get up & take him yourself or order him a taxi - what's the issue??

Depends on where you live? Inner city- nice quiet village town. I don’t blame you for being worried so many nutters out there, especially now Starmer has let out so many prisoners, knife crime, etc. You can’t wrap them up in cotton wool forever though

He's old enough to get married and start a family....

At 16 mine would have told me their plans and got on with it. I would probably get up and give a lift anyway, but they wouldn't be asking for permission and I certainly wouldn't be telling them they could not go.

I actually would say it's a sign that you've taught him good manners - he knows it might be perceived as rude/cheeky/entitled to ask to be picked out when they are already taking him out. Although like PP I expect the other dad assumes that as part of the invitation he is picking your son up.

A 16 year old can walk 10 minutes to friend's at 4am. That's an important life skill

Lots of people don't feel comfortable asking others for a lift (and looking at threads on here calling anyone who dares ask for a lift a CF). I have a friend who will always pick me up for work if she can, she passes my house on the way, but I never ask her if she is or not, I wait until she let's me know the time because I'd feel dead cheeky asking

If you are refusing to let him walk then you need to arrange to get him there. Which I see you have done now.

Why can’t you or his Dad drop him round?
Why can’t you support him getting a cab/ uber?
Walk him 1/2 way?

It’s embarrassing for him to ask them to pick him up - he is clearly saying that to you, as he would rather cancel than ask!!! Bloody hell help him out here!!

YABVVU

What does that have to do with me saying 'If they're open for business they want business.'?

Dont be rotten op. Doesn't it matter to you your kid would enjoy it?

This

i would walk with him. Then climb back into bed.

This is what I would assume too.

I wouldn’t expect a 16yo to walk to my house or have one of their parents drop them off at that time, if I was planning to drive at that time anyway.

The comments are funny. At 16 he's old enough and should be expected to walk 10 mins at 4am in a rough area, but he's not old enough be expected to text for a lift? 😂

I dont get why so many on this thread think the op has been unfair. Insisting he says something like "Hey friend, Id really love to go but my parents are making a fuss about me walking about at that time - seeing as you'll be passing our house anyway, would it be alright if you stop at mine and give me a lift?"
Having the confidence to do that at 16 really isnt a huge ask. Its a life skill. He can ask by text too which makes things even easier.

Im with OP here. Son sounds helpless. If he wants to go he can be a grown up and sort it out.

He's 16. He can walk for 10 mins at 4am. Just ask him to send you txt updates so you know he's safe.

i was thinking the same!

Agree with @banality101

I can't believe you haven't suggested that you will walk with him to his mate's house if you're not going to let him walk on his own. Horrid

Just walk him round. I must admit this thread made me think of Rob Brydon & the famous fishing trip from Gavin & Stacey. I find the idea of fishing quite bizarre anyway. Cold, wet fish in the dark! .

I can't believe you haven't suggested that you will walk with him to his mate's house if you're not going to let him walk on his own. Horrid.

"Not many taxi firms would do a short fare let alone a long one at 4am."

Eh?

Depends where you live. Not all towns have 24/7 taxi services available.

That's ridiculous, of course taxi firms would.

If they're open for business they want business.

As long as his Uncle Bryn isn't going, I think he'll be fine.