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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

AIBU to hope Bento boxes for packed school lunches never take off here?

168 replies

LightDrizzle · 13/09/2024 00:02

Luckily I’m an old bat and it wouldn’t directly affect me but while it’s a Japanese thing that is sort of cute at a distance, the thought of parents, and let’s face it, mostly women, thinking they have to put mental and physical effort into carving Squishmallows out of radishes and creating beautiful and imaginative Bento boxes every day for the delight of their children and the envy of their friends just makes me feel depressed.

It was bad enough in the days of cutting sandwiches and bunging a satsuma, a Mini Babybel and a Penguin in. I’m still surprised at how long it takes to make rounds of decent sandwiches. I loathed doing packed lunches on top of everything else you’ve got to do with young children and full time work. Obviously there is nothing wrong with the Bento box as a receptacle, it’s the Insta-culture expectation as to the contents that make me feel sympathetic dread. Sometimes it seems that as fast as we develop labour saving gadgets and devices; social media and influencers devise tortuous new ways of parting women from any prospect of a moment to theirselves.

OP posts:
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Leah5678 · 13/09/2024 13:02

Lets face it most of us are way too lazy to do that everyday 😂 if someone wants to do it that's very cute but I'm not worried about it becoming common and kids being bullied for having boring lunches. More likely itl be the kids being embarrassed and self conscious their mum has carved a radish into a squishmallow

NotMyCircusss · 13/09/2024 13:00

Oh lord, the pearl clutching over bento 😂

MrsSkylerWhite · 13/09/2024 12:59

I’’ve always liked/used them. Best way of keeping things separate.

Meadowfinch · 13/09/2024 12:57

Quite apart from all the effort, I don't want my child associating meals with nasty little plastic boxes that look like something off a production line.

We have china plates that don't leach chemicals, knives & forks, and hot food that can be served depending on the size and appetite of the child.

NotMyCircusss · 13/09/2024 12:55

I mean, I make mine very simple bento often (onigiri, omlette, rice, chicken, fish etc), because they enjoy it, it's healthy, and, well, we are a mixed race family so we eat that kind of thing regularly anyway. It doesn't have to be fancy, just some carbs, protein, veg etc. Just a personal preference.

SaffronsMadAboutMe · 13/09/2024 12:55

the thought of parents, and let’s face it, mostly women, thinking they have to put mental and physical effort into carving Squishmallows out of radishes and creating beautiful and imaginative Bento boxes every day for the delight of their children and the envy of their friends just makes me feel depressed.

If they don't really want to do it but force themselves to anyway, they're a special kind of stupid that can't be fixed 🤷‍♂️

Nothing to get depressed about, otherwise you'd be in a permanent depressed fog if you considered Instagrammers/Vloggers etc who do these things for show.

SweetSakura · 13/09/2024 12:51

GreenTeaLikesMe · 13/09/2024 12:31

I think people are using bento to mean a number of different things! Some people use the term to mean lunches that are all cut into fancy shapes, and some people use it to mean the type of lunchbox. And in Japan it just means "packed lunch" - the readymade things you buy from the shop in disposable trays are also "bento."

I know that. But the op was clear what she was meaning.

SweetSakura · 13/09/2024 12:50

GreenTeaLikesMe · 13/09/2024 12:34

Yes. When I post I sit here carefully weighing my words, and even the exact placement of each individual word, to ensure I am creating the image of maximum food healthiness, as I care extremely whether random people on the internet think I am an amazing healthy mother or not.

Or alternatively, maybe I am just hammering out posts in between other tasks and the exact position of the word "grilled" doesn't actually mean anything?

I like to think it was the former and I reckon this merits substantial further scrutiny.

I'm also reading something into the fact you didn't mention whether or not the chicken was free range. And you didn't specify the species or origin of fish

GreenTeaLikesMe · 13/09/2024 12:34

ThePrologue · 13/09/2024 08:43

Just because I am at a loss, why did you add 'grilled' to fish, yet just write 'chicken' with no hint as to how that was cooked?
😊Is it because you wanted to reassure that you weren't feeding your child battered stuff?!

Yes. When I post I sit here carefully weighing my words, and even the exact placement of each individual word, to ensure I am creating the image of maximum food healthiness, as I care extremely whether random people on the internet think I am an amazing healthy mother or not.

Or alternatively, maybe I am just hammering out posts in between other tasks and the exact position of the word "grilled" doesn't actually mean anything?

GreenTeaLikesMe · 13/09/2024 12:31

SweetSakura · 13/09/2024 08:35

Exactly. I don't know why people are getting all huffy and thinking op is referring to them sticking some grapes and a babybel in different compartments

I think people are using bento to mean a number of different things! Some people use the term to mean lunches that are all cut into fancy shapes, and some people use it to mean the type of lunchbox. And in Japan it just means "packed lunch" - the readymade things you buy from the shop in disposable trays are also "bento."

SusannaSpider · 13/09/2024 11:19

Acornsplop · 13/09/2024 09:11

So, which boxes are you all using?

20yrs experience and I always buy Sistema now. They wash well, don't aquire a food taste, compartments are a nice size and they survive being kicked about. The lidded pots fit well and don't leak. They aren't made in China. The only slightly annoying thing is some of the bento style ones could do with clips on both sides and not one clip and a hinge.

ObliviousCoalmine · 13/09/2024 11:15

Starlin · 13/09/2024 09:37

I absolutely love the bento box from yumbox. They're durable and we've been using it daily for 4 years and it's not broken or got mouldy.

It means I'm only washing one piece of plastic per day rather than 3-4 little containers and it keeps the sandwiches in shape. I've never cut a cucumber into a shape though...

That's the one we have. Ours is about 12 years old and now I use it for my work lunches 😊

ObliviousCoalmine · 13/09/2024 11:12

@SweetSakura I ate them!

SusannaSpider · 13/09/2024 11:12

sunseaandsoundingoff · 13/09/2024 08:24

why on earth does wanting a satsuma and tomatoes in different compartments of a box mean you have ADHD?

No need for the tone, obviously it goes far, far further than that! I'm hardly going to be diagnosed by my choice of lunchbox. But I do like things with an organisational framework.

ohsobroody · 13/09/2024 10:27

SusannaSpider · 13/09/2024 00:12

I know you said the issue wasn't the bento box as a receptacle, but I love the Sistema ones. I'm not entertaining any of that squashing an egg into the shape of Hello Kitty shite, but having different apartments to fill just seems to stop me scrabbling around - a satsuma fits here, cherry tom's in this bit etc.
I probably have ADHD and it shows on threads like this 😳

That's funny I have adhd and far prefer the bento boxes for kid and had never put it together, large empty box: intimating and annoying
Bento box: fill each section with a component and it makes me feel good lol

RosyappleA · 13/09/2024 09:55

@SilverPiscis I didn’t clarify. I meant the chicken nuggets shocked me in terms of quantity not that they are complicated. The box had so many compartments and about 7 nuggets in the biggest for a 5 year old. One compartment for a freshly made sauce though. (Personally not a food I would put in my DD’s lunchbox at all as she might as well have school meals. The only reason she wants packed lunch is because she is fussy with food and complains school meals are too soggy).

In terms of social media overcomplicating things for mums I do think the meals I see prepared there in general are mostly way OTT and noone has time for that daily. I say that as someone who works part time and tries to cook from scratch. All these appliances that require cleaning and maintenance and space too. I do feel when watching them
that what I am doing isn’t enough but remember that you can eat healthily and simply.

sashh · 13/09/2024 09:49

If you have the right tools it isn't that difficult to make shapes if you want to. I have a collection of the little pics and I find the small bottles great for salt and pepper.

Katiesaidthat · 13/09/2024 09:45

Gosh, no idea what a bento box was until I read this thread. Before school my daugther (6) saw a Bluey lunch box dividend into compartments, we both thought it was a good idea. I now put her drink and different kinds of fruits, biscuits or buns in. No need for extra packaging. The cutting into shapes, pfff, love you lots DD but you will have to survive without it. xxx

SonicTheHodgeheg · 13/09/2024 09:41

I don’t think that fancy chopped veg is going to feature in British lunchboxes before shop bought /restautang food becomes more like Japan in terms of presentation
Instagram is for showing off and is therefore a minority. These people are seeking validation from strangers probably because their own kids aren’t as gushing as randoms on the internet.

Starlin · 13/09/2024 09:37

I absolutely love the bento box from yumbox. They're durable and we've been using it daily for 4 years and it's not broken or got mouldy.

It means I'm only washing one piece of plastic per day rather than 3-4 little containers and it keeps the sandwiches in shape. I've never cut a cucumber into a shape though...

Goldenbear · 13/09/2024 09:37

DreamTheMoors · 13/09/2024 01:30

My mother, God bless her, and God rest her soul, made my lunch every single school day for six looong years because the school lunches at my school were abhorrent.
She was a teacher and even she couldn’t choke them down.
I’m thinking they’ve improved over the years.
Hope so.

They haven't at my DD's secondary school, she is 13 and said they are unhealthy and unappetising, she has a Bento box and makes rice and couscous dishes and vegetables and a homemade (by her) snack like oatcake. However, she gets up early and wants to make it herself.

Sunshineandpool · 13/09/2024 09:30

Where's 'here'? They've definitely taken off here in SE England. I find them quick and easy to make. You can put as much or as little effort in as you want, the same as any packed lunch. I enjoy the creative side of it if I have a few extra minutes but certainly am not carving anything out of a radish!

HauntedbyMagpies · 13/09/2024 09:28

MountUnpleasant · 13/09/2024 09:02

Many parents in this country don't even bother to feed their kids vegetables or food that doesn't come frozen, so I don't think you need to worry. 😂

Proof?

You've just decided that for yourself, haven't you?

Also, just because a food item has been frozen, doesn't make it junk! 😂 Frozen veg has farrrr more nutrients & goodness than the stuff that's been sat on lorries & in supermarkets for days, minutely decomposing and losing more goodness every minute.
Frozen veg is the most nutritious form of veg to eat, especially Birds Eye as they freeze it within an hour of harvesting it!

AGoingConcern · 13/09/2024 09:26

Acornsplop · 13/09/2024 09:11

So, which boxes are you all using?

Our younger ones have yumbox ones currently, but we've also liked Bentgo. Oldest chipped in some of her pocket money to upgrade to a rather fashionable monbento set last year when we were buying new boxes.

Gorgonemilezola · 13/09/2024 09:26

'Why do so many people forget to think about children with special needs?'

The OP didn't. She even commented how great bento boxes are. As has everyone else on the thread.

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