For not wanting to attend a friend's destination wedding?

Like others, I think you are rude and (taking on the rudeness mantle myself) actually lacking in comprehension skills if you can't see that @TreadSoftlyOnMyDreams was empathising with you by giving an example of what she's having to deal with.

Another one saying a wedding invitation is just that, not a summons, just thank them for the invite and explain it's unfortunately not in your budget.

Do you normally get so disproportionately angry when someone is agreeing with you, OP? Because if you are this chippy and aggressive in RL, I imagine you’re a popular wedding guest. Punching flower girls etc.

Strange response. The pp was just agreeing with you.

I've read it several times and I'm still unsure why you're being so rude.

That’s a really good way of putting it.

A friend of mine was invited to her friend’s destination wedding; the friend’s idea was that it would be a very small affair and that people would stay on for a couple of weeks. But what the essentially boiled down to was that my friend was expected to spend £7k and use half of her annual leave to go on her friend’s honeymoon and spend a fortnight with her friend’s DH’s best man (whom she’d never met). Funnily enough, she declined - and her friend was really cross with her. That was a particularly egregious and self absorbed example. But you hear it all the time: “it’s so much cheaper in Cyprus”. Not for all your guests, it isn’t….

There aren’t many places in the UK where someone from another part of the UK couldn’t make a Saturday wedding with one night in a Travelodge involved. Which, for most people, is a reasonable ask if you’re close enough to be invited to a wedding. I think when you start involving flights and annual leave it’s a very different proposition and the expectation can’t be that people will be able to go.

I don't think she's coming back ...

Not at all. If they want a wedding like that the bride and groom should be open minded and accepting that not everyone can commit to that sort of wedding

Quite!

Hazarding a guess, you’ll be fine telling them to stick it 😂

No. Absolutely not.

I didn't say it wasn't "their right". You can host a wedding where you want, but if you don't factor loved ones in, I think that's a bit rude.
My niece had a destination wedding, it broke her Grandma's heart that she couldn't attend.

Ooo I think I would watch that Olympics 😂

I’m sorry but no I disagree. Nothing wrong with choosing a beautiful destination, and any guests who decide to come are welcome. I wouldn’t be offended if I opted for a destination wedding and people couldn’t make it, that’s their right, as it’s the couple’s right to be able to choose where they want to get married.

OP, if you start a thread asking for advice and you get a response you don’t like, you can, you know, just scroll on by; no need to be rude to someone sharing their own experience of being in your situation. That poster wasn’t rude to you.

@WeirdyWorldy "bronze in the destination Olympics" 😂

I probably wouldn’t go to a destination wedding unless it was a country I’d always wanted to visit. Then I could go to the wedding and then have my holiday afterwards ♥️

@emilydispleased you know this is a public forum, anyone can comment and write what the fuck they want. The poster was empathising and made a good point. You've derailed your own thread now. Well done with that.

I think the OP is busy working on her comprehension skills (well I hope she is).

Blimey @needsomewarmsunshine think you're running for Bronze in the Destination Olympics!

Sorry if you've not read the whole thread this probably won't make sense.

On a side note are you going to get dressed up for the live stream? Drink champagne and have a posh meal? Invite other relatives to watch with you? Or just sit in your PJs. Genuinely interested. Must be difficult not being able to attend in person.

I think if she's emigrated, then it's her home.
It's not a destination wedding. I hope you enjoy the live stream.

Me too!
I don't often say 'Wow', but 0-60 unwarranted rudeness to another (perfectly pleasant and empathetic) poster in about 10 seconds must be a record😮...

Dd has recently emigrated and marrying her fiance in his home country. Dh and I aren't able to go due to costs. It's being live streamed so that is a compromise and we are happy with that.
It's about the couple not us.

Of course yabu. It astonishes me that people expect others to attend these things. Fair enough if they want to combine their wedding with a foreign trip/honeymoon/instagram op, but I’d never imagine that anyone else should pay out to make that happen.

Not at all, I've only ever been to 1, my best friends and it was great, but I wouldn't go to another one as it's so expensive and that's your holiday chosen for you that year. Also loads of annual leave taken and they'll realise many people wouldn't come, BFF did and arranged a reception for people when we got back which was lovely as we all wore our outfits again(I was bridesmaid)

Just say you do not want to commit one way or another at this time.