DH has typically shared his weight of chores and errands, we are usually a pretty good team. I've always ended up doing a little bit more in the past 10 years we have been together, but he also typically makes generous surprises like going out to get us coffee and pastries, etc. Kind little gestures and I reciprocate too!
In the last few weeks, I have seen a complete 360 of his behavior. To give an example of a few incidents:
Last night I was feeling unwell and went to bed after cooking us dinner. He left everything out/ food on the chopping board etc. in the kitchen so when I came down at 1am to get some water I had to put it all away. He would usually help by putting everything in the dishwasher but left his dirty plate on the table, and it is still there this morning. This has happened a few times in the last few weeks, so not specific to me being sick.
He goes to the gym 3 times a week, and occasionally takes his car to the racing track. I work around 10 hours a day and don't have the time to do similar activities, which means late nights (WFH). On these days he says he is too tired to walk the dog and will play his video games. I end up going out at 9/10pm to walk the dog in the dark on my own, and it's not safe. We used to go together and share this, even if he was tired.
My uncle (who he has met many times) nearly died three weeks ago from Kidney failure and it was extremely traumatic since I found him dying and had to call an ambulance. I've been running around going to hospitals in another city and absolutely exhausted as I'm his next of kin (no other family where I live). He has shown no willingness to pick me up the car (I don't drive), or take anything off my plate at home. I have had to spend 100s on Ubers, restaurants etc. He has been no moral support. However, he is quite happy to drive to the city or go to places when he wants.
This is not the man I was married to a few weeks ago. AIBU that this not ok? Has anyone else seen a shift in their DH behavior so rapidly?