So dsis and I are both in our forties. Not close growing up but got closer in late twenties when I had kids.
Shortly after my youngest was born (seven years ago) dsis decided to move 6 hours away. I was having a rough time as youngest was born disabled and required a lot of support. Plus our mum was ill and needed a lot of support.
Dsis came home every couple month to see me, parents and friends. She stays with me when she visits. This increased when mum was dying.
Within a couple months of mum dying the country locked down so we were unable to see much of dsis.
In 2022 we took our first holiday abroad in 8 years. Tricky with dds needs but had a lovely time.
In 2023 dsis invited us to visit (previously she had flat shared ) we agreed but she cancelled the week before due to the house needing building work. She suggested coming in 2024 but moved back into shared accommodation.
When she came to visit this summer she made comments about us never visiting and said she wouldn't be back until Xmas. .
I feel bad but my dd genuinely wouldn't have coped with journey when she was younger, then my mum was dying, then Lockdown. Plus she lives in a very expensive seaside town so would struggle to find low cost accommodation.
I've thought about going oct half term but it's a 12 hour round trip and the most I could probably afford is 4 days which I think would be a lot on dd . Plus dh can't get leave so I'd be coping on my own.
Aibu to never have visited my Dsis in 7 years.