I don't like my engagement ring 😞 (pic)

It looks very pretty and your partner carefully selected it. You risk hurting his feelings if you reject it and it might not bode well for the way your relationship goes in future. . An obsession with material things - watches, rings, cars, whatever - is rather sad in my view.

Hope you’ve been able to change it OP, I think the rings you like are gorgeous and it’s your engagement ring- you should have something you love. We chose mine together, which was nice.

The value of rings is so weird anyway. The exact one DH got me for 750 pounds now retails at 2K. It definitely looks that expensive and I know he was very lucky with timing / sales etc but just because something has a hefty price tag doesn't mean it's a nicer ring anyway.

My DH got married after 15 years together so actually bought engagement ring and wedding band at same time. I always fancied a three diamond bevel cut ring but when tried it on hated how it looked on my finger. Tried it with a wedding band and it looked different altogether. I loved the two together, still do. We had a very short 'engagement' i did not wear or show anyone the ring until he put it on my finger with the wedding band when we got married! Try it with a babd you like before deciding maybe?

@TheRealSlimShandy - I was about to say the same! He's not a cheap skate. OP has posted some gorgeous rings upthread for under £1k, and I have a beautiful vintage diamond ring which cost £350.

This was invented as a marketing ploy by DeBeers to sell more diamonds.

I think that's beautiful. I hate showy rings and mine is very similar. However. If you don't like it, please tell him

Could they order you a different one in?

It’s maybe an old fashioned view but I always was told by my late DM who worked in a jewellers for many years that an engagement ring should cost the equivalent of the month’s salary that the man earns.I don’t like that ring OP and I think your BF is a cheap skate. It would be fair enough if you had chosen that ring yourself and were happy with it but you are not. I also agree with PP on choosing a ring together after the proposal. It’s a seems a modern trend the man solely choosing the engagement ring.

The idea to exchange the ring for wedding rings and get the engagement ring you want is excellent.

I think you are worrying about it too much - just tell your partner that you are so excited to be engaged but you would like to exchange the ring for a style that you already had in mind. No need to say anything negative about his ring and I don't think he will be that bothered. You don't want to wear a ring that makes you feel sad and disappointed for the rest of your life!

For what it's worth I love it and would like an engagement ring in a similar style but each to their own - it needs to be right for you.

I had a very similar situation and did end up getting another ring. My husband didn't feel sentimental about what he'd chosen so after working myself up to the conversation for weeks, he really wasn't bothered and was happy for me to choose another one. I ended up paying because it wasn't about the money at all, it was wanting to love the item of jewellery I am hopefully going to wear on my hand every day forever. As an aside I then got talked out of getting a pearl ring by the shop assistant and am still bitter about it 15 years on, so definitely go for a beautiful pearl ring.

The average cost of an engagement ring in the UK is around £2000 according to Google, might be less where you are. I don’t understand the diamond thing though, I think it’s better to have either have an actual diamond, or if finances are tight then a vintage ring or a different stone . I understand why you are disappointed, an engagement ring is a meaningful thing that you will wear all your life, so it should be something personal to you, whereas yours is very simple and neutral but too plain for your taste given the styles you like.
I think just tell him, that you are very happy to be engaged but you don’t love the ring. Exchange it for a simple wedding ring, and choose a different engagement ring together.

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Does he not like the look of big rings like the ones you like, on you? I'm not saying that should sway you at all btw, just wondering if it might be relevant. I like the rings in your pictures as pretty objects, but I know on me they'd look like big 'old lady' rings and I could imagine them making my hands look older. Again, not saying this should affect your personal choice at all, but I'm just wondering if there's a chance he chose something simple and classic because he thinks that suits you more than the chunky things you usually wear.

Bloody hell. It's a ring. Not your marriage.

I think it’s lovely and similar to mine which cost around the same.
My husband chose it (we’ve been married years now) which means so much as I know he would have worried about getting it wrong, and it was all he could afford at the time.

Fair enough if you don’t like it, but keep it to yourself, why post on a public forum, what if he sees the thread, it would be a kick in the guts for him.

I love that he made the gesture and a lovely romantic proposal, but if you don't feel the ring suits you you'll never be happy about it. After all, you wouldn't want your fiancé to choose your wedding dress either, would you? And that's a one day occasion dress, your rings you'll be hoping to wear for many decades!

He does sound like he wants you to be happy, which makes a huge difference. Would he be OK with going with you to another jewellery shop or looking at rings online, so he can see what style of ring you naturally gravitate to and hopefully buy you the one you really love? My DH and I went to choose a ring together, but he was mostly an interested spectator and happy to buy what I wanted. I don't think I would have been happy if I'd had to take what I was given, iyswim)

Bottom middle is very similar to mine. I love it.

Personally I think it’s lovely on you and I like the style of the band. You could have a lovely wedding band and then an eternity band with sparkly diamonds so the whole set together would be substantial. It’s a classic style and timeless.

You're the one who has to wear the ring, if you don't like it you don't like it. You don't need to feel bad about not liking something just because of its price or because of the occasion you receive it in.
If he doesn't know your taste then he could have asked what kind of rings you like instead of assuming that you would be forever gladful for any old ring regardless of if it was your actual style or not. All of this could have been avoided if he had done the tiniest bit of planning.

Are pearls hardwearing enough to wear everyday on your finger?

Just to add that if you do change it, don't go for pearl as this is very delicate and not suitable for an engagement ring that you'll wear frequently.

She’s got to wear it every day for the rest of her life; she has to like it!

If £360 is his budget, could you offer to match it and get something fancier?

I'd be gutted. I'm a huge fan of jewellery but I'm fussy and I wouldn't want a ring I hated either. I also have big hands/fingers and hate the look of small dainty rings on my hands. I'm also a bit of a self confessed diamond snob and would be disappointed with a high street jeweller's ring generally.

I think you're going to have to be honest and tell him that you're not keen and that you'd prefer it if you could choose something yourself together.