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AIBU?

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Original poster

Sleeping with the dead....

36 replies

Lazykitten · 09/09/2024 19:51

Lighthearted. Ish. Until she kills me in my sleep.
Have a reasonably new relationship with the most amazing lady... only..... she sleeps on her back with her hands crossed across her chest. Other than when it's cold and she sleeps on her back with the duvet around her chin.

AIBU - you can't tell someone how to sleep
AINBU - I'm sleeping next to Dracula's bride

OP posts:
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NeverEnoughPants · 10/09/2024 07:54

OrwellianTimes · 09/09/2024 19:58

Buy in some garlic and a steak just in case. If she’s normal you can just make dinner.

Too late...

OrwellianTimes · 10/09/2024 07:47

JustJoinedRightNow · 09/09/2024 22:58

Don't rely on that steak to help though.
You could, however, buy a stake...

Show quote history

It was a deliberate play on words.

YouWouldntKnowWhatIMean · 10/09/2024 05:53

I sleep like this! It's so comfy, I don't know why everyone doesn't. When you lay on your side, what on earth do you do with the arm underneath you? And on your front you squash your boobs! Back sleeping is the best 👌

Fraaahnces · 10/09/2024 05:33

On the plus side - She will wrinkle symmetrically as she ages, I guess.
You could try a spray bottle of holy water next to your side of the bed and see if it works too.

sashh · 10/09/2024 05:15

Is she catholic?

My dad was told at his RC school to sleep like that in case he died in the night. He was 5.

murphys · 10/09/2024 04:52

Your gf could be me.

I didn't know I (literally) slept like the dead until I got into a new relationship. When I woke up in the morning the dude was just so relieved to see me. He said he thought I'd 'slipped away' in the night. Complete silence and didn't move at all. He admitted to poking me a few times just for proof of life. 😂

I take my sleep seriously. None of this flailing about for me thank you.

I am single now and have a king size bed. The only part of my bed that gets any use, is the very right side. Even the ornamental pillows on the other side don't move.
.

rayofsunshine86 · 10/09/2024 04:50

I used to sleep like that throughout my 20s. It's very comfortable.

I am also the kind of sleeper that doesn't move much.

PlumpCatIsBestCat · 10/09/2024 04:04

Merryoldgoat · 09/09/2024 22:52

My grandmother used to sleep like that - it’s very disconcerting.

My grandmother used to nap face down diagonal across the bed with her feet hanging off. I assure you that was disconcerting!

JustJoinedRightNow · 09/09/2024 22:58

OrwellianTimes · 09/09/2024 19:58

Buy in some garlic and a steak just in case. If she’s normal you can just make dinner.

Don't rely on that steak to help though.
You could, however, buy a stake...

Campingholidays · 09/09/2024 22:54

DH sleeps like this but luckily for me I’m reminded that he isn’t dead because of the racket that he makes snoring 😑 I’d rather be the vampire so that I didn’t have to sleep and therefore put up with him…and I do fantasise about all the shit I’d get done if I didn’t have to sleep!

FastFood · 09/09/2024 22:53

I sleep like that and often with my eyes half-open, I must be a treat to sleep with. And I hardly move during the night.

It's actually a very comforting and comfortable position. I like the weight of my hands on my chest.

Merryoldgoat · 09/09/2024 22:52

My grandmother used to sleep like that - it’s very disconcerting.

Soonenough · 09/09/2024 22:49

In this case I would recommend that you have a
duvet each. Then you can hide under yours
and avoid seeing her.

Cece92 · 09/09/2024 22:47

Hahaha how do people sleep like that? I think I'd stop breathing 😂 I love to lay on my side and hug my other pillow 😂

ifIwerenotanandroid · 09/09/2024 22:46

AtYourOwnRisk · 09/09/2024 22:43

Sr Xavier, when I was about six, used to encourage this. Yes, in case we died in the night. Friends now claim it was some kind of anti-masturbation doctrine, but I’m pretty sure Sr X had never heard of anything so risqué. Plus, we were six.

Show quote history

Well, I did wonder about that, too...

glittercunt · 09/09/2024 22:45

My friend has always slept like this. Funny thing being, he's very pale and extremely skinny, we had a sleepover at mine (first time I saw him like this) and I thought he had actually died. Proper panicked. Was hilarious.

AtYourOwnRisk · 09/09/2024 22:43

ifIwerenotanandroid · 09/09/2024 21:13

I'm sure I read a woman saying the nuns at her school told the girls to sleep like that, in case they died in the night or something.

And if I start snoring am usually woken up by my husband saying "oi, nosferatu".

My husband once mispronounced that name & ever afterwards in our house it's Nostafartu, which has taken all dignity & creepiness out of the character.

Sr Xavier, when I was about six, used to encourage this. Yes, in case we died in the night. Friends now claim it was some kind of anti-masturbation doctrine, but I’m pretty sure Sr X had never heard of anything so risqué. Plus, we were six.

Katielovesteatime · 09/09/2024 22:42

I have found my people! That’s EXACTLY how I sleep. It’s wonderful. It’s so comfortable. It’s just the perfect sleeping position. My DH is also unnerved by it but honestly, try it. I really understand where vampires are coming from (except for the whole blood drinking part!).

ladygindiva · 09/09/2024 22:39

One of my DDS does this and always has. And yes , she stays in pretty much the same position all night. The other two are the opposite , roll and toss and turn all night before starfishing and stealing all the duvet. Guess who was my favourite to co sleep with 🤣

SleepToad · 09/09/2024 21:55

bronzecurio · 09/09/2024 20:30

I know of a couple of people who back sleep to prevent wrinkles. Could be something like that.

I like to back sleep, but can only do it napping, and same way with hands folded. It did cross my mind that it was like someone laid prior to burial.

That was Marilyn Monroe's reason for doing it.

Don't some boys boarding schools insist on that too, to prevent nocturnal masturbation?

bluecomputerscreen · 09/09/2024 21:14

I think I found the perfect duvet cover

ifIwerenotanandroid · 09/09/2024 21:13

I'm sure I read a woman saying the nuns at her school told the girls to sleep like that, in case they died in the night or something.

And if I start snoring am usually woken up by my husband saying "oi, nosferatu".

My husband once mispronounced that name & ever afterwards in our house it's Nostafartu, which has taken all dignity & creepiness out of the character.

stonebrambleboy · 09/09/2024 21:11

I thought sleeping on your back encouraged the incubus and succubus.to visit.

Branster · 09/09/2024 21:05

OP, would you please tell us if this lady has no lines/wrinkles etc if she is over 35-38? I've been trying to sleep on my back since my 20s as a preventative measure but I can't do it.
Does she not move at all during sleep?

BabyAllergy101 · 09/09/2024 20:51

I also sleep like this quite frequently. And if I start snoring am usually woken up by my husband saying "oi, nosferatu".

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