To ask what you think when you see a young, fat person?

Yes but I'm referring to people who are genuinely 'naturally thin', that is only 1% of UK population with those genes. The documentary I watched was exploring the scientific novelty aspect of these people and actually more of them were men presumably as more muscle than fat on them. Naturally thin is nothing do with exercising and balancing their intake. Besides over 40 it is either excessive exercise or prohibited food, Thai is the reality for 9/10 of us and ok it is disingenuous to suggest otherwise and it doesn't help the people who are overweight to pretend otherwise.

Maybe some people prefer exercising their brain and are not as worried about spending all their spare time exercising, maybe they prefer to read a book or got to a gallery!

Usually I don't notice and don't think anything about it. On the rare occasion I do, perhaps if they are really struggling, I feel sorry for them. I have struggled with weight issues.all my life.

I think it's cruel of the adults around you to have behaved like that following the loss of your mother.

However, you also have no idea how those close to anorexics or alcoholics behave when they turn to starvation or booze after a trauma. I can assure you that they're not all simpering around after them, no matter what you might believe.

I'm not saying that most obesity nowadays is caused by Medical issues but people's reactions are very interesting. As an example, as a child I became very fat after the death of my mother. It was pretty obvious I was using food as a comfort. The adults around me were absolutely vile about it...so many cruel comments. If my mother had died and my response to that trauma was to stop eating, their response would have been quite different I'm sure

I worry about people who drink too much, yes. So I’m unlikely to think that about someone I see enjoying a drink in a pub because I have no idea how much they actually drink. But if I know someone is drinking frequently or excessively, then yes, of course I think ‘that’s going to ruin your health’. I also judge people who use sunbeds and I also think people shouldn’t sunbathe. I lost a parent to melanoma so I know how dangerous sun exposure can be- I’d hate anyone else to have to lose a loved one to melanoma because it is an extremely vicious cancer. I also worry for the health of people who eat excessive amounts of UPF, drink energy drinks and don’t do any exercise.

When I say ‘worry’, I’m obviously not losing sleep about strangers’ health, just that I see people doing these things and think ‘Oof, that’s really bad for you.. I wonder if you don’t know or just don’t care’. And then I just get on with my day 🤷🏼‍♀️

When they say 'I eat what I want' they also fail to say 'but I exercise and balance my intake'
Because fat people don't like to hear that it's a simple energy equation, they want another reason.

Why are you explaining that to me, I know what slim feels like, I have only been slightly overweight for last three years in early 40s. I know loads of people, lots of women who are thin and very thin and none of them naturally do two I know have eating disorders. I'm not suggesting slim people can't eat a lot but this tends to be younger people that compensate in some ways I e exercise or tens of thousands of steps a day. Older people just don't eat very much and that's especially true of very thin not just medium.

I absolutely agree with this. When people say that they eat whatever they want and don't put on weight...I always think, doesn't that depend on what you want? But yes, a lot of people interpret that statement as meaning they can eat endlessly and never put on weight. The number of people who genuinely can't put on weight whatever they eat is vanishingly small. For me, the only time my BMI was in the normal range and top end of normal so still not particularly thin, was when I barely ate, one meal a day. I dread to think how little I'd have to eat to be thin rather than just slim

I eat 3 meals a day. They're healthy and home cooked, and I rarely snack. I very rarely drink alcohol. I don't drink fizzy drinks. I do yoga and cycling 5 or 6 days a week, and I'm generally active as both a result of having young children and wanting to keep up with them as they grow.

I'm thin and fit. I could quite easily eat a pile of toast slathered in butter at 4pm every day, because that's my favourite food. But I don't because it's not healthy and I'd prefer to stay in shape. I'm certainly not pretending that I don't work to be healthy, because I do. As do the other thin and fit people in my life.

I don’t believe it either. Nor do I believe for one minute ‘I worry about their health’ why would you actually worry about some stranger’s health as they passed you in the street? It’s the same as someone asks on here ‘I’m a size 24, would you wear a bikini if you were me?’ ‘Of course! If I saw you on the beach I’d probably think ‘I love that bikini!’ Honestly, they just wouldn’t!

@Goldenbear
Yes to some degree, however many slim people do eat a lot, they also exercise to compensate for a big appetite or enjoying their food.

What depresses me as much as anything else is how angry and bitter people are when talking about weight.

And also how strangely proactive people are at displaying everything in their clothing choices, while also telling everyone they're unhappy about their weight.

If you are well, if you don't have some kind of medication which is causing weight gain, it is physically possible in 2024 to make food and health choices that allow you to be slim in your 40s.

I have however been absolutely pilloried by people for who I am, to the point where I just think I wish I was this age, but in 1970 or 1980 where at least no one would even think of me as a 'skinny minnie' or the other ridiculous terms.

My point?

My point is that we have a national problem with talking about, and thinking about this issue. Until we get over the psychology of it, it will be ever thus.

I was born at the tail end of the post-WW2 boomer generation, and women on my father's side of the family have always had to fight a slow metabolism, so I'm very sympathetic to you. As I'm older and have seen a few generations grow up, what I notice about people - especially young women - in their teens and twenties, is how common being overweight is. Very different from decades past. My automatic response is feeling angry that the food industry combined with long working hours, has meant that they've been brought up on mass-produced ready-meals, with ingredients never seen in a normal kitchen, and their metabolisms are damaged as a result. It doesn't make sense that your generation tend naturally to being overweight, when that's never happened before.

What I also think it is counter productive is very thin people claiming that eat all and sundry as it is just a fabrication 9/10 that doesn't help overweight people, many very thin people approaching middle age don't eat much especially if women. I think it is a control thing, it is waiting to feel a bit superior suggesting it is effortless but it isn't and actually would be kinder to say to someone overweight that honestly I don't eat that much!

I met a young girl four years ago and she’s put on so much weight in that time. I feel so sorry for her. I don’t think she realises how hard it will be to lose the weight/ change her lifestyle. Harder as time goes on. it’s already restricting her mobility. It makes me really sad, but I just know that anything I say will ruin our relationship.

Because these things absolutely do happen, but they're also far more rare. 30 years ago the population was not as obese as it is now. There was one or two fat kids in my whole school.

We haven't suddenly been inflicted with a load of medical issues that never existed before. People, for the most part, just eat too much of the wrong thing and don't exercise enough. Then they have medical issues.

Exactly this.

I then think promoting 'big is beautiful' is counter productive as it normalises obesity and being unhealthy.

Don't be so silly. It's possible to think about more than one thing, you know? Are you telling me you wouldn't have any kind of reaction to seeing a grown woman's naked body if she were severely anorexic? Because if so, I just don't believe you.

Anyway, yes I do find it repulsive. There's nothing nice about seeing someone else's large overhanging belly. I don't want to see any random half naked when I'm in a cafe, but I certainly don't want to see that. It's just not nice.

Generally when someone has an illness or takes medication which causes weight gain, they are treated so often with cruelty and criticism. However, when someone has an illness which causes weight loss, other people are full of pity and sympathy.

If a terrible trauma leads to an eating disorder which causes weight loss, again lots of sympathy and kindness. A trauma which has caused binge eating or comfort eating...and the reaction from people is one of nastiness.

'repulsion'? And all your other visceral reactions, seriously? What other things do you think about other than people's looks.

If they're doing those things to excess, and someone asks me if I'm concerned, then the answer is yes.

I don't pay much attention to other people most of the time. But if I did give it some thought, I'd think how worrying it is that so many young people are not taking good care of their health and that being fat when you're young is storing up health problems for the future. It's good that you're actively losing weight and taking charge of your health.

And to add - if I see someone eating a Subway footlong sandwich I don't feel that reaction, nor would I if they're having a glass of wine or lounging on a beach. They could be one off things in a life of otherwise healthy choices.

It's the culmination of these choices every day that's concerning.

I'm 27 and I have no opinion on other peoples bodies. I have been both overweight (childhood and adulthood) and underweight. I know the difference you’re treated if you’re ‘thinner’ and it’s horrendous. It’s ridiculous to me the way people are treated based on the size of their bodies.

All bodies are beautiful. And I believe a body is a shell to the ‘soul’ - it’s just skin, your true self lies within and not what surrounds your bones.

I don't typically see people dangerously underweight half naked in front of me. If I did, I'd also have a visceral reaction.

If I was presented with an alcoholic with a jaundiced look, blotchy skin, swollen face and hands, etc., I'd have a visceral reaction.

There's a woman in my street who has and still does abuse sunbeds. Her skin is like crispy leather, and again, I feel a visceral reaction to it.

It's perfectly normal to feel something negative when you see these things. There are more visibly obese people in every day life than the above, but just because it's common doesn't mean it's normal. I can't help but see it. I can't help that my gut reaction is repulsion and that my brain thinks something should be done/have been done to prevent it.

I don't believe half of the people who say "Oh, I just see a nice scarf! What a cool bag!".