To ask what you think when you see a young, fat person?

Although I don't think anything in general I'm over weight myself and around 15 years ago I lost nearly 5 stone taking my weight to one where I felt good in myself and could walk into any clothes outlet, be it high street store or supermarket, and buy clothes off the peg, it was wonderful to be able to do that rather than only go to selected stores.

Now the weight is back on, I'm obviously older and I'm finding it hard to lose and back to having to travel a distance to find nice clothes that fit and look half decent.

I'd give my hind teeth to feel as good as I did back then but to be honest the struggle to lose the weight does drag me down but I've made a good start at giving things another go.

You say you're actively losing weight, well done, experience has taught me to chip away, not rush things, it's a mindset change that's needed, and in my case to know that although a chocolate bar is quicker to open than it is to make a piece of fruit look more appealing the fruit will be the better choice in the long run.

Good luck on your weight loss journey.

Given the size increase in the general population, I think you'd need to be shockingly large, or very large and terribly dressed, or beautifully dressed (which is also often the case) to really draw my eye in anything other than seeing right through you as I go about my business.

I generally don't think anything of it.

I did see a family yesterday with two obese parents and three very overweight children. I felt quite sad as the parents were clearly failing with their diet and lifestyle, and creating issues for their children. One overweight person I don't usually notice, I'm a size 16, but five including a primary aged child I notice. I felt they needed to make some changes, perhaps they are in denial, or consider it acceptable for all five to be overweight.

Well that's surprising as a size 8 is not tiny by any means, where do you live that this is commented on all the time? I think the people I have heard comment on being skinny the most are skinny people, personally they all have issues around food. I can spot it a mile off as I was one of those people on my early twenties.

I don't think about it unless my own weight is on my mind (which it is a bit recently tbh as I am battling perimenopausal weight gain). For example, I was in southern Europe recently and it was 40 degrees and if I wore a dress, my inner thighs chafed, which has never happened to me before. I did think then, this must be what it's like being fat. Followed by: oh my god am I fat now?

I think it's perfectly possible to be fat and look good. I have friends who successfully achieve this! I don't think we should waste our lives worrying about our weight (even though I am a hypocrite as I do worry about it) but that said, it's going too far when things get into the 'morbidly obese' category.

Most of the time I think absolutely nothing. If someone is morbidly obese, struggling to walk / breath I do think about their health and hope to myself they are getting support to improve their health.

I know someone who is morbidly obese in their 20s and struggles to get upstairs. I don't think negative of them for being over weight I just really worry about their heart and lungs and worry that it will only get worse as they age. I know someone is encouraging walks and healthier eating and I'm cheering them on inside to improve their health. It's none of my business really but it's hard watching someone so lovely suffer.

If you active, not struggling and generally happy in life I'm happy for you

I only register if said person dresses like they are size 10 ie low slung pants and crop top. I don’t think there goes confidence I just think sad. And I say this as a person who has been carrying at least 15kg extra than I should for years.

Honestly, the only time I really notice any young person especially large, is if they are noticeably unwell- weezing, using mobility scooter, significant mobility issue when walking. I have seen this more often than I'd like. Because, all I think is how sad it must be for that young person to be so unwell with their weight issue - I am talking about under 16s here- it breaks my heart.

Younger adults? Tbf, I'm not really paying attention unless you are noticeably enormous- size 30 plus? I will just wonder about why you got that big. That's it really.

You’re so right - very rude.

I loathe fat shamers and weight obsessives. Stupid and nasty, combo of doom.

I feel a bit sad for them. My husband has always been fat and it’s caused him all manner of health problems over the years.

Same. I don’t generally register other (unknown) adults much except to notice, for instance, that I like their outfit / shoes / hair etc, but I do notice when children are so fat it stops them playing or running. That makes me feel really sad, as their body has become a prison. I try not to judge the parents in such cases, but on those occasions when I see the children being handed crap to eat, I do judge. I shouldn’t, it could be the child’s birthday and a special treat, or they could have a health issue causing the weight gain, but in my head I’m thinking that the poor child needs help.

As a skinny person I can tell you that you are wrong.
People think it’s absolutely fine to say things directly to slim people insulting us about our weight.
I’m size 8. They usually imply I have an eating disorder. If I say no to food I’ve been told I need it and should have 2, and if I eat a lot I’ve actually been asked if I’m bulimic. People can be extremely rude to slim people.

I think 0 or ‘she looks good’.

A lot of people genuinely think being thin
means healthy, even immortal.

The press fosters this illusion daily, hysterically.

Weight doesn’t make that much difference long term unless you’re too thin/mentally ill or need a fire truck to leave the house via window. Exercise, however…

I would think it is nothing to do with me, like I wouldn't think a very thin stranger is my concern. I knew a Mum school gate friend and she was obsessed with other people's children's weight, it was weird and ultimately mean. He own child is very skinny but that's because she would take to them about not being greedy.

I wouldn't care it judge, everyone's shape is different.

Depends how fat we're talking. I don't think it'd come to my attention someone's size unless they were morbidly obese.

If I see someone big enough that I do notice them then I'm going to be completely honest, I wonder how they afford to each that much to not only get to that size but to maintain it. This is probably because I don't go out much and when I do it's usually to the supermarket so that's where I'm most likely to see them. I'll usually have the cost of food in my head when I see them and be cursing at how prices have shot up so much in recent years. I genuinely don't think I could afford to be morbidly obese so I wonder how others afford it 🙈

If you dress nicely I'm more likely to be looking at your outfit than your body. I am usually trying to soak up style tips as I'm useless and not very confident. Seeing people (especially larger people) rocking outfits with confidence really boosts mine by proxy!

You've asked for honest opinions and that's to be applauded 👏

If it is someone that's a few sizes above average it doesn't cross my mind and if it's a female & they are lovely looking I might say to myself she's very pretty. If the person is obviously obese my only thought is omg that looks awful & really uncomfortable.This is regardless of whether they appear happy or say people are fat phobic if they question obesity. My intentions here are not to offend anyone but OP asked for honest opinions. If someone is obviously anorexic I think that looks awful, what a shame, she needs help. I know I shouldn't judge other peoples appearance but again if we are honest the majority do.

I tend to think

"I wonder if they wish they were slimmer or don't care"

As I spend most my days wishing I was slimmer

I rarely notice what the people around me look like honestly, I definitely don’t judge someone for being overweight. My BMI is 22 and look healthy and fit to the world, but I have other really unhealthy habits that I use to cope with my life and emotions, it’s just you won’t see them. I totally understand how people use food as comfort and how binge eating happens.

If I’m running in the park and I see overweight people running/speed walking I want to give them a high five or encouraging smile (I don’t obviously) because they’re trying to fight their demons and that takes a lot of strength.

I feel sorry for them tbh as being fat in later life is no joke. Your body kind of gives up.

Something has changed in our environment over the last forty years, and it is very likely to be the normalisation of a diet largely made up of highly processed foods.

Do you think it also has something to do with other popular vices like cigarettes, drugs and alcohol now being made illegal (or at least extremely expensive) whereas food is, obviously, available to everyone no matter what?

I'm mostly musing, but in the past - how many mothers chain smoked, or got through the day on drugs or by drinking gin? All equally as bad for you, but not as visible.

If it was on a bus I would be hoping they didn't sit next to me.

Being a similar age, I personally wouldn’t notice it unless I was trying to date them! I actually think being overweight is somewhat normalised/seen as the default and being slim is seen as unattainable. It’s much more noticeable if someone has a desirable figure as opposed to anything else. It’s not necessarily rare to come across someone who is young and overweight

I think, thank god I'm not that far anymore and I hope I never get that fat again. But then, I've lost 15 kg in the last 2 years.