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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To expect redress from wedding venue?

117 replies

Coffeeandgranola · 08/09/2024 12:48

Last summer I booked the ceremony venue for my wedding this October. It's a university chapel within the wider campus grounds which have a very unique and atmospheric area for wedding photos. It's a really well-known wedding location in the area and I would say getting these photos is one of the top reasons couples choose it (including us).

When we had our viewing of the chapel ahead of booking we spoke about a range of things with the events coordinator which would have absolutely included at least a passing mention of our photography plans, and no concerns were raised.

I've now - 6 weeks out from the wedding - found out indirectly that this area of the grounds has been booked for 'filming'. From googling I have a good guess what for, and the university will be making £££ from it. I've spoken with the events team to understand the impact on our photos and they've confirmed the area will indeed be inaccessible to us.

I've pointed them to the booking T&C's which say that for photography, they do not guarantee 'exclusive' use of any area of the university grounds which I don't read as the same as having no access at all (when I read that at first I took it to mean there might be other people milling about, there might be belated graduation pictures being taken we would need to work around...). I've also reminded them how all their official social channels for the wedding venue use images of this specific part of the grounds as profile photos, cover photos, lead post images etc. They have offered a different part of the grounds as an alternative but it's in no way comparable.

We've spent a huge amount of effort and money planning our weddings around a specific theme/vibe (e.g. our wedding outfits were picked with this photo location in mind). We have no alternative options for sheltered wedding party photos (mindful of October weather).

AIBU to not let this go and push for some kind of redress? If so, what? The cost of the chapel itself is a drop in the ocean compared to the overall wedding cost.

OP posts:
MartinCrieffsLemon · 08/09/2024 15:32

Non exclusive means someone else might be using the grounds

Which they are

You have some space to use

BobbyBiscuits · 08/09/2024 15:25

If you can find the details for the location manager of the shoot, you could try and shmooze them. Even offer money, just to take some pics at a time when the shoot is on break or something?
There's no way they'll disrupt filming for you but if they are nice they might give you a few minutes. But they also don't want to make themselves look awful. It does depend on the level of arrogance the producer displays. Usually a lot sadly. But the venue seems to have legally covered themselves. Not that it's right. It absolutely sucks.

aliceinanwonderland · 08/09/2024 15:22

"In which case"

aliceinanwonderland · 08/09/2024 15:20

I read the clause as meaning that OP might have to share the space, not which case it is the college which is breaking the contract in not allowing OP any access whatsoever

Words · 08/09/2024 15:15

I may be totally wrong here but I am not getting a Harry Potter themed wedding vibe from the OP.

How disappointing though! Maybe going back at another date as a pp suggested would work.

peppertrees · 08/09/2024 15:14

What will happen if it rains? I mention this as my October wedding there was a huge storm and so the beautiful grounds were unable to be used, or even seen. Just had photos at the back of the church.

HauntedbyMagpies · 08/09/2024 15:12

OP, call LBC tonight at 9pm and speak to barrister Dean Dunham. He does an hour on consumer law where people can call in and he gives free legal advice on their consumer issue including things just like this!

Changethetoner · 08/09/2024 15:12

Is the photographs the most important thing? Surely the chapel is? The wedding ceremony itself, where you make your vows together, before God and your families and friends?
Yes it is nice to have some photos to remember the day, and you will have, just different ones to the style you originally thought of.

Justsomethoughts · 08/09/2024 15:10

It is really disappointing OP. Can you return for photos of just you two at another time? Appreciate the other guests wouldn’t be there but that could be one thing they could offer?

HauntedbyMagpies · 08/09/2024 15:09

MartinCrieffsLemon · 08/09/2024 13:12

They've offered another area, booking says you might not get use of an area and presumably you'll get everything else in the package

They aren't denying you anything.

No it doesn't. It says you might not get EXCLUSIVE use of that area. Comprehension is key

Ivehearditbothways · 08/09/2024 15:03

MartinCrieffsLemon · 08/09/2024 14:57

They still have use of the grounds though... just not the bit they want

That’s not what “not exclusive means”.

”No exclusive use” means that they will have full use of the grounds, but others may be using it too so they have to fit in around other people being there.

It does not mean that parts of the grounds will be off limits. It just doesn’t mean that, so they are in breach of contract.

They have booker the chapel plus the grounds with shared use. They are now being told they cannot have access it all of the grounds, and in particular that they cannot have access to the one area which the university use in all their wedding venue advertising as the main selling point:

They are breaching the contract. “Not exclusive use” doesn’t mean “some of the grounds may be off limits to you.” It means they have to share use of the grounds.

BlueBellsArePretty · 08/09/2024 15:00

If it's Glasgow Uni and they're not allowing photos at the cloisters then they're being totally unreasonable. The cloisters really are their USP.

CrossUniStudent · 08/09/2024 14:58

I wouldn't be happy and would definitely be pushing this further. I agree 'not exclusive use' does not indicate no use of any area. Just that no area will be able, to be used exclusively by your party.

MartinCrieffsLemon · 08/09/2024 14:57

m00rfarm · 08/09/2024 14:22

No - it said "exclusive" use. Not NO use.

They still have use of the grounds though... just not the bit they want

Beautifulbouquet · 08/09/2024 14:55

I'm a wedding coordinator and it is unfortunately really common for venues to withdraw elements of the wedding near the day without any compensation.

It is totally unacceptable and I've seen it all eg couple being told they cannot have any hotel rooms in country hotel where wedding is miles from anywhere.

I wouldn't be hopeful that they'll apologise or accommodate and I would get a lawyer to review the contract and write a letter.

They count on the fact you don't want the stress of conflict with them and honestly brides always back down.

I'm assuming your photographer has worked with the venue before...definitely speak to them as to whether they've experienced this before and any alternatives they can suggest.

I'm guessing with an October wedding your final payment is due imminently?

Pipsquiggle · 08/09/2024 14:53

When Chatsworth House had it's entire facade behind scaffolding due to window restoration, people getting married there still had the same shots but Chatsworth digitally enhanced the photos so that the building appeared without scaffolding. I think they had a bit of a discount but not much.

twomanyfrogsinabox · 08/09/2024 14:51

They are offering use of another area of the grounds, if you don't like the area they suggested can you have a look around and find somewhere you do like and push for that, if it's an old building there may be some interesting less obvious spots. Ask the film company if you can find out who they are, might be good publicity for them and they may not even be using that area on that particular day.

Notmollybutdolly · 08/09/2024 14:48

Has to be Glasgow uni. Also because there is constant filming in Glasgow these days.

SpacePatch · 08/09/2024 14:47

albalass · 08/09/2024 14:42

I immediately thought Glasgow too. Beautiful venue.

I thought it might be University of Greenwich where a lot of filming tends to happen, including Bridgerton which will be going back into production by then. If so, OP, it’s a beautiful venue and I wish I got married there. But there are also plenty of photographic opportunities in the grounds and park surrounding it and lots of different buildings there which wouldn’t all be in use.

user1471522343 · 08/09/2024 14:45

I think I’d try and establish exactly when the area was booked out for filming. If it was before or even shortly after you booked, then I think you’d have a decent case to claim compensation. In any event I think they should have told you as soon as they knew to give you time to seek alternative solutions.

No idea how you would establish this information though - ask the bbc or the college?

MiddleSock · 08/09/2024 14:45

I would also argue that not exclusive use means other people milling around etc, no you can’t use it which they should have highlighted since it is there unique selling point. I would ask if the filming was taking place that day and they need to book you in 30mins with the filming crew to take your wedding photos, or bonus with the film set!

albalass · 08/09/2024 14:42

EarlofShrewsbury · 08/09/2024 13:59

I thought the same about Harry Potter but my mind went to Glasgow Uni.

I immediately thought Glasgow too. Beautiful venue.

fruitbrewhaha · 08/09/2024 14:41

I think if you do negotiate to go back to take photos the venue needs to cover the costs of the photographer plus any other expenses. It could be shit, or you could make a nice event of it in itself. If you’re getting the ushers and bridesmaid back for it, you could head out for a drink/ lunch afterwards. So get the venue to chuck in a few quid for that, plus anyone’s transport etc.

anotherside · 08/09/2024 14:39

“they do not guarantee 'exclusive' use of any area of the university grounds which I don't read as the same as having no access at all”

I think you’re right. Not guaranteed exclusive use would imply you may have to share use (ie with another event/party), not that some areas might be completely off limits. So that’s clumsily worded from them, at best. If not purposely misleading. I’d kick up a fuss about it with them and see what their response is, and also try and get a reasonably priced solicitor or whatever to give their opinion on that wording. They might owe you some pretty significant compensation.

SDTGisAnEvilWolefGenius · 08/09/2024 14:38

I think @DoYouReally’s suggestion of asking for access at a later date, to do the photos you want in that area, is a really good one, @Coffeeandgranola - and it would be reasonable to say this should be at no extra cost.