Part of being an adult is ensuring the house is secure, right?

35 replies

planAplanB · 08/09/2024 00:44

Just gone downstairs to find the back gate still hooked wide open and the back door unlocked. STBEXH just went up to bed and left it like this. I'd already gone up so if I hadn't have gone down, our house would have been open to anyone during the night. Our children's bedroom is on the ground floor. AIBU to be pissed off over this?? My father drilled into me that the last person to bed secures the house.

OP posts:

PashaMinaMio · 08/09/2024 06:00

Last to bed is ok but why not give yourself peace of mind and do your own lock-up routine earlier in the evening when you’re all settled in? Is that possible?
Clearly you can’t trust STBEX so that might be a solution?
Id be furious too.

HelenWheels · 08/09/2024 05:54

he is moving out due to finances?
bit odd
he is irresponsible with finances?

WhenSunnyGetsBlue · 08/09/2024 05:39

Not even about being an adult - it's being responsible. Not unreasonable to be mad, but I wouldn't go crazy. I have forgotten to lock the door before now after a late shift, only realised in the morning. It was an accident and it happens. If it's a one off then maybe have a word.
and let him know how concerned you are. If it's happening all the time despite you mentioning it, that's different.

Haroldwilson · 08/09/2024 03:57

Your house insurance probably doesn't cover you if you don't practice basic security like locking doors overnight.

RawBloomers · 08/09/2024 03:45

Surely this depends on whether it’s that risky. I don’t always lock my doors where we currently live. There hasn’t been a burglary in years.

CheekyHobson · 08/09/2024 02:00

Ugh this reminds me of my ex. Front door left unlocked/open, ranchsliders left unlocked. Once I took the kids away for a few days, and he also went away (somewhere else) after we left. Came home first to find the upstairs balcony doors were left wide open for three days, not just an invitation to burglars but thank goodness it didn’t rain in that time!!

AutumnColours9 · 08/09/2024 01:55

My ex used to do this. Drove me mad!

Original poster

planAplanB · 08/09/2024 01:00

Thanks. I just needed to vent. No, he's not moving out due to finances ☹️

OP posts:

mrsfollowill · 08/09/2024 01:00

I'd lose the plot with this- how bloody irresponsible! In this house the front and back doors are always locked. If you open it to go out you lock it behind you. The day we moved in next door neighbour warned us they had a spate of walk ins and bags/car keys had been pinched.
I always make sure the house is secured before bed- I am the last person to bed 99% of the time but I trust DH and adult DS to lock up if I'm not there- the day DS got his own doorkey (aged maybe 10/11) he followed this to the letter. Glad he is a STBEXH

Lorelaigilmore88 · 08/09/2024 00:50

Yanbu.
My ex used to do this. Front door left ajar with small children in the house, windows downstairs left open overnight, electric hob left on overnight... it drove me mad. The thoughtlessness for our children's safety made me incredibly angry.
If he's soon to be an ex will he be moving out? You definitely have the right to be pissed.

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