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Nursery key worker worries

37 replies

LuckyBrickPombear · 06/09/2024 20:45

Hi all,

First time poster and desperate for advice.

DS is starting nursery in a few weeks and we attended our first settling in session today and I have left feeling so deflated and worried.

He is 13 months so attending the baby room, we met our key worker and he had a little play. When we were there all the babies seemed very unsettled and didn’t seem happy. Our key worker informed us she had only just started and our DS is her only key child. She also informed us that she had not had DBS clearence yet as the paperwork takes a long time (she had only been there a month). I overall didn’t warm to her and don’t feel reassured leaving my baby with her. The other girls in the room also seemed quite miserable and didn’t want to be there.

I have been a much more anxious first time mum than I ever thought I’d be and the thought of leaving him there is making me feel so guilty and sad.

AIBU? Or would you feel the same?

I’ve voiced my concerns with DH, he says give it a chance and if DS doesn’t settle after a month we can have a word about changing key workers or even looking at other nurseries.

OP posts:
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qualifiedazure · 06/09/2024 23:01

VestaTilley · 06/09/2024 22:55

Find somewhere else, postpone returning to work if needs be (and doable).

Report to Ofsted - if her DBS hasn’t come through (should be enhanced) then she shouldn’t even be working on site yet.

It's normal for new staff's DBS checks to take a while to come through - nurseries work to tight legal ratios, so they can't be one member of staff down for 8 or 12 weeks while DBS is done. It's not an Ofsted issue.

VestaTilley · 06/09/2024 22:55

Find somewhere else, postpone returning to work if needs be (and doable).

Report to Ofsted - if her DBS hasn’t come through (should be enhanced) then she shouldn’t even be working on site yet.

gossipgirl1 · 06/09/2024 22:24

mellowfell · 06/09/2024 22:12

Oh wow my ds's school trip was cancelled last year as there weren't enough dbs cleared volunteers and they didn't accept parents without dbs.

Schools must be different, the early years are so underfunded if the staff couldn't work while they are waiting for their DBS to clear and there was no staff to cover we would have to send children home as we would be out of ratio. They should at least speed the process up for people who have already have a DBS but have to get a new one due to starting a new job.

mellowfell · 06/09/2024 22:12

gossipgirl1 · 06/09/2024 21:33

Actually they can, I am a nursery manager and its common that a DBS can take a while to come (up to three months) they are never left alone with the children and don't do nappies or toileting until it comes through.

Oh wow my ds's school trip was cancelled last year as there weren't enough dbs cleared volunteers and they didn't accept parents without dbs.

theresabluebirdinmyheart · 06/09/2024 22:11

The staff looking miserable and like they don’t want to be there would be such a red flag for me, I don’t think you’re being unreasonable at all, was just reading a horrid story in the news today of an abusive nursery worker who was jailed for 3 years. I agree with PP that childminders are much better if you can find one, the only drawback is, if they are sick or on holiday there is no one to cover.

MichonnesBBF · 06/09/2024 21:58

I'm an Early Years TA in a school nursery and my DBS took 8 weeks after I had started.
I was offered the job in June for a September start. I still went 8 weeks without one.
Contract was signed well before, so no they could not delay the start date as they would then need to pay me for not working.
I was however not allowed to be alone or be apart of any intimate care at all, the school were very strict with making sure all safegardig procedures and policies were followed with this.

MsCactus · 06/09/2024 21:58

Also OP I have a nanny and a childminder - I pay three times the amount per day for the nanny... And my 2 year old prefers her days with the childminder 😂

A good childminder can genuinely be brilliant for your LO, do interview a couple if you can't find another nursery or still don't feel happy

gossipgirl1 · 06/09/2024 21:55

gossipgirl1 · 06/09/2024 21:54

Yes its legal, like a said its the norm. Its not like all the members of staff in the nursery will have no DBS, its just the new starters and only for a short period of time.

Also, they will have applied for it, just waiting to receive it.

Glitterbiscuits · 06/09/2024 21:54

Look for an experienced childminder. They are worth their weight in gold.

gossipgirl1 · 06/09/2024 21:54

upat4am · 06/09/2024 21:51

There is absolutely no way I'd leave my child in a nursery where they had someone with no DBS working with children. Is that even legal?!

I have a DBS for my job and don't recall it taking long to come back.

In your shoes I would be looking for another nursery asap. Trust your intuition.

Yes its legal, like a said its the norm. Its not like all the members of staff in the nursery will have no DBS, its just the new starters and only for a short period of time.

Chickychoccyegg · 06/09/2024 21:54

I'm a previous nursey manager and now childminder.
It is usual as already said for a member of staff to work while waiting for their dbs, but they will always be supervised.
All the room staff will look after your baby, not just keyworker, so wouldn't worry about that too much either.
I'd be more concerned that staff seemed uninterested and unhappy, that is much more worrying, and doesn't make for a happy, enriching environment, if possible I'd try and look at other nurseries and childminders, when you've found the right childcare for your family, you'll know and feel comfortable leaving your little one...this doesn't sound it unfortunately.

gossipgirl1 · 06/09/2024 21:52

GlennCloseButNoCigar · 06/09/2024 21:48

This is how we do it. Or for example I started with a paper DBS but nothing on the update service, so I had to go through getting a new one to put on the update service. So I wasn’t shadowed as I had a paper one only 6 months old. But other staff members are shadowed, and never left alone.

Our baby room is horribly unsettled right now, because our have moved up and we’re full of new starters and settles. It could also just be that.

I’m new too, I still have a first class honours degree and years of experience lol! Being new isn’t always a bad thing.

YES! we have a surge of new starters every January and September haha it can be a bit challenging but it gets easier in a few weeks.

upat4am · 06/09/2024 21:51

There is absolutely no way I'd leave my child in a nursery where they had someone with no DBS working with children. Is that even legal?!

I have a DBS for my job and don't recall it taking long to come back.

In your shoes I would be looking for another nursery asap. Trust your intuition.

GlennCloseButNoCigar · 06/09/2024 21:48

gossipgirl1 · 06/09/2024 21:21

Nursery manager here. Its actually quite common for nursery nurses to work without their DBS as it can take months to come through. However, they are not to be left alone with the children until they have it nor do any intimate changing or toileting. If the other babies have not long started that could explain why they were not happy. I have had three or four babies start around the same time which can be challenging but they are well cared for. It can take up to six weeks for a child to settle and then its like they have been here forever and their faces light up when they see their key worker, don't give up yet.

This is how we do it. Or for example I started with a paper DBS but nothing on the update service, so I had to go through getting a new one to put on the update service. So I wasn’t shadowed as I had a paper one only 6 months old. But other staff members are shadowed, and never left alone.

Our baby room is horribly unsettled right now, because our have moved up and we’re full of new starters and settles. It could also just be that.

I’m new too, I still have a first class honours degree and years of experience lol! Being new isn’t always a bad thing.

BurbageBrook · 06/09/2024 21:45

Honestly sounds like a shit nursery. Sorry. But it really does.

gossipgirl1 · 06/09/2024 21:45

That's true, I wouldn't be happy if my staff were looking miserable but if some babies have started at the same time and they are unsettled, they have been dealing with that all day. In my nursery though I would send more staff to support or just go in and support myself.

Lavender14 · 06/09/2024 21:44

I think it's important to trust your gut on these things op. Have you viewed any other nurseries in your area that you could go back and look at or any you haven't explored?

ZoChan · 06/09/2024 21:43

There's a massive shortage in early years staff. Also consider that every new job, requires a new dbs. You can't take your old one with you (regardless of being on the Update service). So this key worker may have had a dbs from a previous nursery and the new one isn't through yet, as it takes time.

The general vibe you describe, though, doesn't sound amazing. Enquire around your area now, even if you don't end up moving, because spaces are sparse in a lot of England.

Hope it works out

OCDmama · 06/09/2024 21:43

Jesus no.

Staff looking uninterested and bored? Recipe for disaster. And this is when they're showing someone around as a potential client???

Go with a childminder if you can find one.

gossipgirl1 · 06/09/2024 21:42

Its always been the norm in nurseries, even when I was working as an apprentice about 12 years ago. My DBS didn't come back for around 6 weeks as it was my first one but I wasn't allowed to be alone with them or do any nappies or take any of them to the toilet. In general, there is only one may be two new staff members starting at the same time so there is always other staff in the room who have their DBS and is fully qualified.

MsCactus · 06/09/2024 21:41

This doesn't sound great to me. For a child that young, have you considered either a nanny share or a childminder?

With a childminder you meet them, vet them, see their Ofsted reports, know exactly who will be minding your baby each day. Childminders have more checks than either nursery workers or nannies.

Could you interview some local childminders and see if you prefer one?

Abracadabra12345 · 06/09/2024 21:38

The babies being unsettled and staff looking miserable is more of a worry

And there's a parent in the room so you'll be seeing the room when staff are likely to be on their best behaviour

Stardustmoon · 06/09/2024 21:37

gossipgirl1 · 06/09/2024 21:36

Schools might be different to nurseries but its the norm and completely fine with Ofsted we had our inspection in February and got good in all areas there is always 4 staff in our baby room so they are never left alone.

Generally shocked by this. We don't even let parent volunteers help on a trip without a DBS check and they are never left alone.

gossipgirl1 · 06/09/2024 21:36

Schools might be different to nurseries but its the norm and completely fine with Ofsted we had our inspection in February and got good in all areas there is always 4 staff in our baby room so they are never left alone.

Gooseysgirl · 06/09/2024 21:34

Slinkyminky22 · 06/09/2024 20:49

Always go with your gut instinct on these things, I find.

Absolutely THIS!