Is private at primary actually worth it ?

I moved my daughter from State to private after 3 years and she flourished once out of the crowd control, limited resource environment. Maths and English both took a battering during that period. However I also moved her at a point when paying the fees became very easy. I probably could have been more on top of how she was doing - I was already paying for some holiday science workshops. had she stayed in state I would have paid for additional tuition and academic courses etc during holidays.

I don't see the point of this kind of thread or what people are supposed to advise. Every state school and every private school are different.

All that happens is, people come on with THEIR personal anecdotes about their child in a particular independent school, or state school. But what relevance is that?

You know the schools in question OP. Go and look at them - make a decision. Nobody on here has a clue.

This is a really helpful post. We are in same dilemma at the moment. We are in a good area with good state options, yet many of our nursery peers / parents friends are still going private.

the facilities at private are great. My husband feels there are other advantages such as growing confidence , communication etc. is it worth it , they would enter at reception

Million dollar question I suppose, as every child is different as is every school my most recent experience is through my dgd’s the oldest is eight her school built about five years ago, has many great facilities really lovely outside play space & fields for sports/Forest school,
she is in a class of 26 working at GD across all subjects she & few of her classmates get taken out of class once a week for more difficult work in maths & English, they have a coding club/science/chess/cooking clubs after school they also have visits from experts in various subjects last term an archeologist as they had been studying ancient Egypt & others at least once a term.
my dgd is quiet shy & not very confident, the teachers have really helped her blossom.
my youngest dgd starts next week a class of 24 I’m sure she will have the same opportunities as her sister & most of all it’s a caring & nuturing environment with committed excellent teaching staff, so that’s my small window into a state primary school, good luck with whatever choice you make OP

What is silly is the assertion on that no state school has enough scissors

The post would have been more valid if there was a recognition that some schools struggle to fund all the items but to say that no school has enough just isn't true

I was a primary governor and knowing that it isn't the case for one school negates the arguement. Equally invalid is the assertion that all parent complaints are listened to at private schools, I know from my own friendship group that this isn't true and I've read threads on here about many issues parents have.

Thats quite rude. Maybe scissors do seem like a small matter but I was a class teacher in a london state primary before having children and it was what made me keen to put my own children in private.
The time I spent after school
mixing up paint by diluting it with water to make it go further, handing out scissors and glue “one between two”. Painful! It may seem silly to you as an adult but the silly extra treat type things are great for motivating children.
And wanting the kids to have more attention and more sports and better extra curricular isnt lacking in common sense. The opposite surely!

The schools are often much smaller so fewer friends.

Even the big privates near us have tiny year groups in the primary stage.

Educationally pointless and fewer friends.

I can only talk about my child:

July born boy, speech issues, motor skill issues (suspected dyspraxia).

We moved back from abroad and missed the cut off of for applications so were given a poorly performing school on the other side of the borough.

He is in a private primary which a learning support unit in house that does 1:1 intervention with him (included in fees). He is shy and often overlooked in groups but the school do loads to share out opportunities to shine- it’s not just the same few children chosen for everything.

His confidence has grown and he’s made great progress and is celebrated for what
he can do and his achievements which might not be the same as everyone else. He’s in a class of 18 with a teacher, class TA and then additional support staff as needed. He wouldn’t get this in a state school.

It’s absolutely worth it for us, and for him.

That may have something to do with the fact that private school primaries in grammar areas literally have the specific purpose to teach children to pass the 11+.

Whereas state primaries are not allowed to prepare their children for it.

I live in a grammar school area and the private school primary kids have a significantly better success rate at passing the 11+ than the state school kids.

Non-grammar school areas I don't see the point unless you're going to carry it on throughout their whole school career.

Rainbows are 5 and 6 year olds? So they've had at most 2 years in school? Most of this influence will be based on their family situation.

And those going to private schools, are likely to be from affluent educated families. Who statistically tend to have more academically able, confident children.

All children benefit from small class sizes and will thrive in an environment where classes are calm and purposeful, where teachers have the time and energy to give individual attention.

In some areas, yes, in other areas no.

Depends on -
General area, transport/ getting there.
Class sizes in state primary where you're likely to be offered a place.
Reputation.
Facilities and opportunities for extra curriculars.
All day care?
Leadership and whether academy.
You might have religious preferences.

There is more riding on the choice of secondary, frankly.

I hope they teach your child better common sense than you have. You can't possibly generalise and some of your points are laughable, ice creams? Scissors?

Plenty of state primaries have forest schools and languages and nice playgrounds

It's great that you are happy with your choices but plain daft to think your experience will be replicated for every single other child

I think if you can go to a nice state primary and potentially do some extra curricular activities after school it's not worth the money on private. Personally I was in a state school until year 5 and private from there. We're planning to definitely do state until year 6 with our kids and then consider the options for year 7. For me I think it was beneficial to not be in private for all my education. I think privately school can be a bit of a bubble in terms of lifestyle and who you interact with.

YES 100% worth it!

So much individual attention, which is great for both kids that are struggling AND great for pushing high achievers.
Much better sporting opportunities
Generally way nicer playground and play areas.
Better classroom stuff: good quality paints, pair of scissors and glue for everyone, ipad
for everyone for research and
online activities.
Lovely food.
Lots of lovely extras: forest school, cooking, ballet, spanish, trampolining, coding, hot chocolate or ice cream on fridays, school animals.
Being a customer rather than a service user
means that your concerns are listened to and acted upon, always.

It's a pretty meaningless question OP. Whether anything is "worth it" depends on whether the benefits outweigh the costs, and that obviously varies from one family to the next and is dependent on so many different factors. You have to look at your personal financial situation, the school's quality and culture, transport considerations, the educational needs and personality of your child, etc.

Remember though.... getting loads of individual attention isn't always a good thing in terms of learning to be a self starter & do things with less help.

I would keep them in state until year 5 and move them to private in year 6 to get ready for a private high school.
use the money you save to spend on tutors etc - getting them ahead in academics is good for their confidence

Very similar story for us.
I have one in independent and one (younger siblings,) in state.
Have opted for what is right for then individually. Both thriving where they are.
We moved, post first child going to private, onto a road that has an outstanding school hence youngest attending.

Pros and cons of both. There are lots of posts on here regarding perceived disadvantages and mindset of parents who are pro private.
Your own circumstances should dictate this.

Way better wraparound care and better sports and peripatetic music teachers, meaning less traipsing around, but having experience of both, unless you work long hours it is absolutely not worth it, no. In the case of some schools I would say quite the contrary in fact.

As many have said, it is dependent on the child, the schools in question and also your circumstances. For us it has been 100% worth it because the best local primary does not have wraparound care so I would effectively have had to give up work to cater to their short school days. When we went to view the state option, I spoke at length to the head about the demographics of their school population and it was explicitly clear that the majority have one parent who does not work or works very part time. I was not prepared for my child to be the extreme minority with two parents working full time and feel left out in terms of socialising and playdates.

As for the ignorant PP spouting out their nonsense about social status - the state option was far more socially exclusive than the private - catchment where houses average over £1m, very low percentages of FSM and EAL children. Our prep school has a much wider range of incomes and working patterns amongst parents.

The other benefits of prep are the small class sizes, individual attention and academic drive. They ensure each child achieves their full potential, not just work with the ones who are not yet at standard. (I know some state schools do this but there was just one that ticked this box when we viewed schools and that was the one without wraparound). The way they work on the children's self belief and confidence whilst simultaneously celebrating others' achievements. DC have specialist teachers from the outset and a huge focus on all the specialist subjects because the teachers are not spending class time managing behaviour.

Ultimately, we would have gone down the state route for the good one had it not been for lack of wraparound care. Financially, it has absolutely made sense for us - I would not be where I am in my career without the private school that provides extensive care and activities on either end of each day. In the next few years, they will move into the state sector for secondary - I have no concerns about them not being streetwise etc. They have a wide social circle from nursery and weekend activities which consists of children predominantly in the state sector and you couldn't tell them apart.

I think it's very child dependent.

DB put their son through private as he was very shy, even to the point of selective mutism.
He thrived in a class of 14, but may have struggled with 29 others.

BIL put his daughter through because she has a severe milk and peanut allergy and the private school were on top of it. Plus no free milk every lunch!

Obviously state schools should be able to deal with both above scenarios but there a difference between barely accomodating and confidently providing for.

We have 2 Outstanding school next to us (we were offered a place at one) and chose the PS.

Both of my DD's are in Rainbows and you can see the difference between the 4 girls at private school and their counterparts. They are worlds apart, not just in reading and writing, but in confidence, and the ability to present their work.

I have always been a little sceptical about our choice and only gave our state place up mid August for DD1 just before her Reception year.