To ask you to help me process things and get home from France.

2 sides to every story, there is only 1 here. Whatever was said by 2 adults has resulted in the actions taken by your friend. She may or may not be justified in changing to a hotel but until her side of the story is heard it is difficult to say if any of the drama is justified on either side.

There are 2 children involved, the adults should be able to behave as adults and calmly discuss what is the best way forward. Whether the firendship survives at this point is almost irrelevant.

If you do not wish to try and mend the situation, then I suggest you stay and enjoy the remainder of your holiday whilst also organising a way to get home, or go home straight away. Either way you need to speak to your friend to see if she plans to travel home with you and your daughter and make plans dependant on the answer.

It sounds like you do not wish to take any blame in what has happened - I would suggest you think as to if you should apologise and try to sort out the situation.

"Hi friend, we probably both said and did things yesterday which we may be regretting now. Maybe being in a small caravan for the duration of the holiday with 2 young children, with hindsight was not a good idea. I hope you daughter is feeling better today, enjoy your hotel stay hopefully we can still get together each day and enjoy ourselves, but have the evenings apart and this may lead to less fraught situations occurring - let me know what your Disney plans are and we will meet you there, sure the girls will have a lovely time. Sorry if I said things which in the heat of the moment I shouldn't have, let's put it behind us and enjoy the rest of our holiday together before we all travel home"

What a bitch! I'd be cancelling the ferry and disney tickets. Bet she uses those both too

Do not let her use your Disney tickets, and cancel the ferry.

OP did you speak to her at all before she left?

I'm absolutely gobsmacked a friend would abandon you in a foreign country like this with your autistic child when she is supposed to drive home. What an absolute cunt. I'd never speak to her ever again. Change your ferry and go speak to reception, wev done Eurocamp/Park and always arranged transfers to the airport via them I'm sure they could do it to the ferry hopefully. Pretty shocking a parent with a child who has DLA herself would have such a lack of empathy and care towards a child/friend dealing with one meltdown.

What date are you supposed to be coming home OP?

I'm still waiting for the "Your 5 year old HAS A PHONE??!" comment 😂

I think she said the meltdown happened in a public place, the friend stormed off back to the caravan and texted to say she’d booked somewhere else and was leaving in the morning. I assumed both women and both children spent the night in the shared caravan?

Another option is to get the coach from Paris to London that would include the ferry and is cheap. It's a long journey but everything is organised for you. Flix bus

I would also look at flights and Eurostar rather than foot tickets on the ferry. A lot simpler. If I'm honest, I think your friend will cool down though, it would be a horrible thing to leave you and a small child stranded abroad, really far beyond normal getting fed up on holiday territory

Has she taken all her and her daughter’s belongings, OP? I mean, is it clear she’s definitely not returning to the caravan, or whether she may have just gone out for the day with her daughter to cool off, and just left the car seat in case you needed to cab somewhere or just because the sight of it reminded her of the meltdown?

I think she said upthread that "friend" had gone to stay somewhere else for the night, but could be wrong!

I think you need to think of the outcome you want OP - would you rather speak to your friend and try and smooth things over in the hopes of continuing the friendship OR do you have no wish to continue to friendship beyond this incident?

If the latter I would be cancelling the ferry tickets so that you can concentrate on sorting your own travel home, and I would forbid the use of the free Disney tickets also.

If the former, speak to your friend…ask about the plan for return travel arrangements since she has well and truly left you stranded, at the very least confirm with her that she doesn’t plan on returning for you to travel home together.

If I was your so called friend and did what she has done, there is no way I would just leave you and your child without letting you know the plan for getting home. Regardless of what has happened and any perceived rights or wrongs this is what I find most unreasonable about the whole situation. I see from your posts her child has some additional needs too, so I am loath to cast aspersions on her when I don’t know things from her perspective and why exactly she felt the need to separate from you on holiday, there may be legitimate reasons from her point of view for doing this. That said it is completely out of order for her to leave you to worry and wonder how you will get home, that is what’s most unforgivable here!

I was really hoping that it would work out for you with your friend, OP, I'm so sorry.

I can't fathom going on holiday with a friend (who cannot drive) and leaving them stranded, with a child to boot. That is really despicable behaviour. You really must ring your friend to check what the arrangements are for going home though. It may be that your daughter's car seat was left in case of need - or it has just been dumped. You need to know which to inform what you do next. Don't just assume because if you go ahead and cancel the arrangements from your side... and she does call back to pick you both up, that will be awkward piled on top of disaster. Check first.

Once you check the position regarding getting home with your friend you can make your plans as needed, safe in the knowledge that you're either being picked up, or making your own way.

I would never do this to a friend I was on holiday with. If we'd had a row then I would definitely look at separate accommodation but I'd never abandon someone who had no means of getting home. If it meant that our friendship was over then so be it but I wouldn't leave someone hanging on will they/won't they take us home again? Cruel.

Ring her, OP. Have that awful conversation and then you'll know what to do next.

Oh, OP, I am really invested in this story. As fellow mum to a non neurotypical kid, I feel this pain / frustration / chaos. Can I ask if it's not prying what the best help you need is? Are you considering cutting your holiday short? When are you due to travel back? Do you want any of us to look into travel options for you? If you were willing to share where you needed to get back to, I'm sure some of us would be more than happy to help.

@Notsurehowtoprocessthis please consider trying to get confirmation from your "friend" that she has gone ahead and abandoned you-
Ideally via text rather than verbally?

I understand that you don't want to create any additional drama, but I think that it is important that she is put in a situation where she absolutely needs to confirm that she is doing this to you.

Without her acknowledgement there is the opportunity for her to later claim that she 'never meant it', or was 'joking' , or even that it was your idea etc..

You also might need confirmation or proof should you need help from any charities, authorities or insurance.

I also think maybe it would be worthwhile to state clearly the difficult position that it leaves you in- again so that she can't use the excuse that she thought you 'would manage', or were happy with the situation.

Deep breaths, you will get through this.

Give her a clear day and ask whether she will be driving you and your daughter home as planned. Don't be overwrought but ask her. Give her time to cool off but open the conversation so you know you've tried. If not, ask her If she plans to take the car seat. If that's not her plan it's unforgivable.

Forget Disney. Make the best of the trip on and near on the campsite. I'd speak to a rep and formulate the best plan for getting back with plenty of time. I'm sure they'll try and help. You say you have funds, if need be can you jettison the bulkiest luggage and replace the car seat when you get back? Message friend who owns it and explain first. I'd rather buy a new duvet than drag one across France. Try a courier but I wouldn't spend hours on it. It prob won't cost much less.

It may still be all out of proportion and she has left the car seat as she thinks you might need it for some reason. Try and open a dialogue but at the same time form a contingency with the help of the reps. If your friend likes drama, give her the chance to climb down. I wouldn't particularly want her as a close friend again unless there's a lot more to this but at least to get you home.

Two more Facebook groups for you - lifts in france for everyone and Travel between UK and France - there are always people coming and going - you can contribute to fuel/tolls etc. Also try Blabla car....

Sounds like you weren't suited as holiday mates. I'd chalk it down to experience and move on.
Speak to the Eurocamp rep - I bet they'll have spare suitcases in lost property.
Once you've taken the first leg of your ferry it's tough to change the return leg, even with a flexible ticket - you'll likely lose any discount.
I'd get the Eurostar and not bother with the ferry. It's a real faff as a foot passenger.

The OP is having a rubbish time and needs support. If MN and social media is her support then who are you to be so negative???

I'm so sorry this is happening on your holiday :(

I was going to say that maybe she just wanted to separate for the rest of the holiday but would meet up at the end to drive you home, but seems like not.

If I were you I would definitely cancel the ferry and change to foot passenger tickets.

What she has done is really not on. It doesn't matter how angry, I would never ever leave a friend stranded - even more so abroad!!

Wishing you all the best for your return home. And also was thinking perhaps you could look into liftshare.com on the offchance that you can find someone to share your journey home with.

Just checked skyscanner London to Paris flights tomorrow are £38

I'd cancel the ferry and not tell her. Let her be stressed and stranded, she doesn't deserve any heads up for that.

Use your Disney passes or ask your friends to cancel them - if you are not going to use them could you resell them? Also definitely cancel the ferry - don’t pay for anything for them, she is an awful person. To have a falling out is one thing but to strand someone is completely out of order - I wouldn’t do that to an enemy let alone a friend. I would be annoyed she got annoyed at a kid having a meltdown - they’re kids that what they do!

I would cancel the ferry and let her know you are doing that and tell her the Disney tickets are cancelled (whether or not you can). Honestly with friends like that who needs enemies!

Any friend of mine would have to resort to murder for me to abandon them in that way, especially if she had a child with her. OP, did you say that your friend's child receives DLA? I presume therefore (unless I've got the acronym wrong) her child has some form of disability or health issue? In which case surely she would be more understanding.