Walking to school alone - advice please

It is the norm in tons of places to have kids aged 9 or even younger to get themselves ready to school and fo there and back independently. And spend a few hours alone until parent gets home from work.

Yes absolutely fine, there are probably other children walking too. The school can’t have any say in walking to school but you’ll need to give your permission in writing if walking home (probably).

You simply tell him/her that you’ll terminate his SIM card in his phone and disconnect the WiFi if he doesn’t. Your younger one needs guiding - as you say it’s a busy road. The older one has to accept life involves doing things you don’t like. Time to lay down the law.

Unrestricted access to the internet (though of course you don't have to let children have that even if they have a phone but not all parents place proper restrictions on their children's smartphones) is far far more dangerous than walking to school alone so yeah, I'd expect children to reach the ready to walk alone stage first.

I was driving through town yesterday at quarter to 8, which is when school starts for many children. Saw so many children walking and biking to school, some tiny 6/7 year olds. Not a single parent was with them. All managing fine.
Well, I did see one boy riding his bike with his helmet dangling oh so usefully from his handlebars, but otherwise fine.

Exactly this. There is a lot of evidence to suggest that access to smartphones is extremely harmful to children. There is no evidence to suggest that allowing a developmentally ready child to walk 5 mins to school is harmful.

It’s the school that doesn’t allow the children to have phones, not OP. And the maturity to not use phones in class or to not misuse/be adversely affected by social media is entirely different to the maturity required to walk yourself 5 minutes down the road.

There are quite a few adults who find aspects of phones difficult, given the pressures of social media.

@rawbloomers awful solution? I think thats quite a reach. What I said was I dont understand the logic between not allowing a child to have a phone yet expecting them to be independent enough to walk home. Make it make sense.

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'walk home in the dark'

It's a five minute walk remember.

Most schools round here finish just after 3pm. I don't see it being dark being an issue for most kids, even at the height of midwinter if the lived in Inverness...

I was in primary school in the 70s. Things were a bit different. Crime was a lot higher, for a start.

My own children were in primary in the 2010s and, even though most adults had a phone, most primary school children did not. Lots of them still walked to school.

If there’s an emergency that requires emergency services, why can’t they ask someone nearby to call 999? Why would that be an awful solution?

Mine walk to school (year 6 and 5) and don’t have phones. I can’t imagine what emergency would befall them on the 500 yard walk, on a route where many other parents and children are walking to school at the same time, that would warrant phoning 999.

I think in an emergency you would call 999.

In what circumstances would or should a child call 999 rather than running to school or approaching an adult?

it will be dark nights soon.

She won't be out at night. It will be the middle of the afternoon, and it won't be dark.

@Rawbloomers I think in an emergency you would call 999. That's the thing with schools it doesn't make sense so a child is responsible to walk alone but not to have a phone and turn it off during school hours. How old are you? I'm early 30s and a 90s baby so how many decades are you going back? Things most definitely have changed since then.

It does say in the OP:
“She's not allowed a phone at school which is my only worry, how would I know she got there?”

So that is kind of the point of the whole thread.

But people did manage to walk to school just fine before mobile phones became ubiquitous. It wasn’t that many years ago.

For emergencies - she’s 5 mins from school and there will be other people walking and driving the route and houses she can get to much faster than OP will be able to get to her even if she did have a phone.

Sorry I forgot to add but remembered after reading your post. You surely need to give your DD a phone OP? You can't expect her to walk with no phone what if there was an emergency? You can't rely on the school if you are willingly letting your child walk alone. Makes no sense.

As a single parent myself this sounds tough. Have you sat your Son down and explained that he's been selfish?

My school allow Y5 to walk home I think its too soon as the term has only just started and it will be dark nights soon. Although it would take DS around 15mins to walk home nobody from his school would walk the same route as him so it's a worry. Ultimately I do think unless schools on your doorstep the start of Y5 isn't a good idea.

I'm not in a village but it docent seem to happen around here either, if it did I can guarantee it would be all over FB

I would just tell your son he has to walk her. We have a similar situation here. My daughter has just started secondary and it's a fair walk (30-40 mins) home and she doesn't know the way confidently yet. My son is 14 and has been told he has to walk home with her. He isn't happy about it but it's hard luck I'm afraid.

If your DD is comfortable doing it I think it’s fine in itself and I’m sure the school would let you know if she doesn’t arrive! However whilst I fully understand teen laziness and ‘uncool’ things might be an issue for your son I think I’d have a strong word with him about child and female safety and how he needs to look out for his sister.

At 15 surely he should be able to understand that he needs to do this for her personal safety / security reasons

Why? Thousands of Yr 5s walk themselves safely to and from school every day. Why is OP's DD at greater risk than all of them? And if she is at greater risk for some reason that OP hasn't mentioned, it's unfair to put the responsibility on a 15 yo.

This thread just highlights how poor people are at assessing risk.

Either way, it is not proportionate to stop your children doing things that they’re developmentally capable of ‘in case of flashers’.

Or because nobody would bother to report flashing when the police can’t even deal with rape properly.

I can’t find a single incident reported of a flashing having ever occurred in my village. That’s not to say it never will, but I don’t think it’s a risk that needs to be given huge weighting to when deciding whether to allow my children to walk to school.

Incidentally, ResToothBrush, I was very mature and worldly wise at 6 - I was abused at home as was my mother. It was still frightening on the street.

ResToothBrush
Because that's what we are actually talking about. Not your experience in the 1960s as a 14 year old and your level of maturity“

I wasn’t 14, I was 6. No need to be so snippy. It happened more than once - on residential streets in SE London with people around - and was very frightening.