Not to know how to manage my evenings with DD?

5.45-6.00 Quick shower + PJ’s on (bath Fri/Sat/Sun)
6.00-6.30 Homework
6.30-7.30 Snack + TV (Dinner + Chores)
7.30-8.00 Brush teeth, read then sleep
8.00-10.45 Work/Rest
10.45-6.45 Sleep

I would put your dinner in the slow before work or throw something quick in the air fryer (do some chores whilst it’s cooking) and eat when she has her snack

If you have a timer on your washing machine I’d put a load on in the morning and time it to come on so that it finishes at 6.30pm

I did all primary homework with DD pre school. We got up early and did it over breakfast

She won’t need dinner. Mine are at after school club until 5:30/6pm. They have their School dinner and then I make them a big snack to eat at after school club. They don’t need more than that. If they are hungry I would make them something small but if they were at home all day would you be making them 2 hot meals a day?
in my eyes they have been learning all day at school, we don’t get home until 6 so a bit of chill out time for an hour doesn’t hurt. We chat about our day, they watch tv and play with toys. Then at bed time we will read books.
don’t put too much pressure on yourself.

Subtitles are an excellent way for children learning to read, to get used to seeing the words and start to pick up the look of words to speech. You could pop them on for the tv time, have the 15 minutes reading time and this should really help things along. A little and often.

I honestly wouldn’t worry too much and just make sure you’re reading a bedtime story or two with her. I think it’s more about sharing and understanding books at this age.

When my ds was in reception there wasn’t really homework, maybe a model or something to make at the weekend. I used to do some reading (him to me) at weekends and in the week I’d just read to him as part of the bedtime routine (usually 2 stories then more weekends and holidays in the daytime) and ask him to follow the words with his eyes or ask him to read the odd word or sentence depending on his age and what he could read at that point. It made reading a fun relaxed bonding activity rather than a pressured thing and he has always read really well. We filled in the reading record as and when and I’d always apologise to the teacher at parents evening that it wasn’t filled in more fully and they’d just wave me away and say “don’t worry, we can tell he reads at home” and that was that.

im surprised by the comments saying to replace tv with educational apps? is this for real? what on earth is wrong with a bit of tv at the end of a day of both school and after school club - the child has been on the go all day!

tapping away at an educational ipad app sounds crap tbh

Im sure the rushed tea time that many kids have is not a bonding emotional experience - no need to make the OP feel bad.

time for nice shared meals at weekends - some tea in front of the telly in this case sounds like a relaxing end to a tiring day for both parent and child! a single parent has to make sure they have energy to do bedtime alone - they can have the bonding time then.

You have hd a lot of replies so not sure if you will see this - but honestly in primary I don't believe in homework.

i think there are some downsides to 5 days a week in ASC - and some upsides as they get used to it and make friends I imagine. They also get a run around and playtime after school which is good for them. As long as it's good quality ASC>

Being a teacher is so tough! I don't know how parents do it.

She will go to bed later as she grows older - but also perhaps you will be able to drop some of the hours at some point if you feel you need to.

Do you never sit down to eat together? Don’t you consider that an important social and emotional bonding experience?

Swapping after school club to a childminder who is specifically asked to do homework with her might help, if such a person exists.

If you have to do homework, it probably needs to be the first thing you do when you get home before she gets too tired rather than being lumped in with relaxing, calming bedtime stories.

I think you are beating yourself up too much. She has a very long day outside of the house (I mean no judgement in saying this). I don't see what is wrong with her then watching TV to decompress. If anything, I would see it as a good thing.

I think the tea is dependent on whether she's actually eating a good-sized portion of school dinner, but it's fine for now and as she gets a bit older I'd review whether you can eat a bit more of a meal together.

Homework will likely be limited so can be done at a weekend. The reading is really important and I would try to cut down the getting ready for bed time to leave more for the reading time (even if it's 5 mins of her reading and then mostly you reading to her). Hopefully the need for you to sit with her while she falls asleep will dwindle and if it doesn't I would say you need to address it a bit more.

Hot food is not inherently more nourishing, though I tend to prefer it! My kids used to have school lunches so that I wouldn't feel the need to cook in the evening if I didn't want to.

Reading/ phonics or whatever school expect shouldn't take more than 10 to 15 minutes at that age.

I don't think your timetable needs much adjusting, if any!

Can she read to you while you are doing chores?
I remember following my mum round the house reading to her when I was little.

Lots of reading us understanding what's going on in the pictures

No, it really isnt. The focus is on decoding the letters to blend and understanding the words. Looking at pictures to work out the words is an old (now unpopular) strategy which can lead to bad habits of guessing words in weak readers who are then completely fucked when they move to chapter books with no pictures. It also creates issues applying your reading across the curriculum where children need to decode and learn/new unfamiliar vocabulary. You can't guess the word pipette in science from the picture if you don't know what a pipette is.

You leave school at 3:30 on every day you work?? Really? What about staff meetings or clubs or parents evenings or clearing up and planning for the next day or marking?? My school only finishes at 3:20. There are still kids to supervise at 3:30.

Im not surprised by this. At our primary the teachers don't run any clubs at all after school. Pick up is 3.15 and teachers wouldn't be supervising any kids left - it would be one TA/reception.

Parents evenings are only four nights per year.

There's not much marking in ks1 and planning takes far less time for very experienced teachers who can draw on things they've used before. Materials can also be shared across a keystage & lots of schools buy in schemes for maths & english. Good leadership don't ask for unnecessary paperwork or constantly change requirements without need.

I see lots of the teachers at our school heading off at 3.45/4pm.

You might find even a 7.45pm/8pm bedtime is too late in reception. One of mine was crashed out by 6.45 every day in reception, other rarely made it past 7.

Do the reading first thing in the morning.

Get in at 5.30 - can you pre prepare any food to make it faster? Just give her 20 mins eating & watching tv then straight up for bath, it was the only way for mine or they got exhausted.

I would add you might prefer to get more work done at school but I like having more time at home to get few jobs done, get into pyjamas etc.

I think reading her book with her when she’s snuggled in bed maybe the answer for you.

I’m full time with additional responsibilities in primary. I couldn’t leave at 3:30 and I don’t think management would be ok with any of us doing this on a regular basis.

I have two nights where I aim to leave by 4:00/4:15. I work through lunch to do this most days (unhealthy I know), I try not to get into conversations and keep focused. I take work home and do more on some nights to get my early finishes where we can go to the park or to their clubs.

I wouldn’t worry too much about cooking a hot dinner every night. It sounds like your dd is getting a well balanced diet with plenty of fresh fruit and vegetables. I remember when my children were in primary they were happy to have a plate of sandwiches , fresh fruit and veg and a yoghurt in front of the tv too. It was their way of winding down. School can be tiring and she will be eating and socialising at after school club. Things may change as she gets older but for the moment I would do what makes life easy for you both.

This seems a lot to me as a teacher too. We finish at 3:15 and I leave at 3:45 twice a week due to after school activities/collections with DSD. I do two late nights until 5 and I’m out the door with the kids on a Friday! I go in at 8:20 for a 9am start. Work through lunch 2x a week and work at home planning for an hour on a Sunday. Can you look at what you can do to give yourself less after school tasks? More lessons with peer/self assessment? Subscriptions to resource websites so you aren’t reinventing the wheel every lesson? Your workload seems intense for a single parent and a couple of earlier finishes could help!

Don't stress too much, your evenings sound fine and normal for working parents. When I worked full time and they were 5 it was pretty similar.

Watching tv is fine I don't know why so many are against it, unless they are glued to the tv all day and do nothing else it's fine, children need to relax and switch off too especially after being at school and childcare all day.

If it was me I would try to come home earlier and do your work at home so dd can be at home more, even though you might not be directly communicating with her or actively playing you're still around. Also it would give you more of an evening at home, but this might not be possible for you atm.

If she's taking a long time to fall asleep she might need to go to bed a little later. I used to put on audio books that they would listen to in bed - sometimes it's not possible to read to them every single night and mine turned out fine and are very bright did a levels and went to uni.

Working and children is always hectic and stressful but you're doing the best you can do

Been there. Harsh but true answer is your decompression time is when you make her snack, you read before tv and plan meals that allow you to do housework while they're cooking. Its hard going but it doesn't last long

Thinking back to those days now, investing in a cleaner was probably one of the things that saved my sanity. 2 hours on a Friday meant the house was clean and fresh for the weekend-it was a luxury but a worthwhile one!

We often do the reading in the morning, sometimes over breakfast even. It only really takes 5 minutes, and there wasn't any pressure to other homework in reception.