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AIBU?

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My MiL has flounced out of Christmas

186 replies

ItsOhSoQuietThisChristmas · 03/09/2024 17:39

Sorry to mention the Christmas word, but…

I’m kind of annoyed, but I also think it’s funny.

Every blinking year, I have to invited my PIL and extended in-law family for Christmas, and then at least another dinner. MIL is someone who wants everyone together. This usually ends up with me doing a lot of work as they stay over!

There have been a few years I’ve got out of it. Once we went skiing with my DC at Christmas and we got hell over it. So we’ve not done it since.

Over the past few years my DH has been all, “it’s family. It’s just a few days. Christmas is about family”. That’s my MIL talking, not him. He’s been very sentimental over it, and I’ve felt emotionally blackmailed. Basically they all have a lovely time, and my Christmas is shite.

So, a few weeks ago my MIL announced she and FIL aren’t spending Christmas with any of their adult DC or DGC and are going on holiday for 2.5 weeks. It’s basically from a week before Christmas till double digits in Jan.

She’s flounced because she’s in a huff that no one is paying them enough attention, including them etc. She basically has to be the centre of attention, or you are punished. It’s a spiteful move. Her DC will be upset that they aren’t seeing them at Christmas at all. They’ve all got FOG.

On one hand I think it’s hilarious. I even played happy songs and sang along in my car I was so tickled. On the other I’m kind of pissed that I’ve had to suck up crappy Christmas for “family”, forgoing what I want to do (go somewhere Caribbean 😝)

DH mentioned about extended in-law family and Christmas but that’s a big fat NO from me, and I mean it.

I looked at my work schedule for before and after they leave. In Jan I’ll be well back to work and hibernating.

AIBU to go online and book up my early Dec with gorgeous Christmas things to do for us and DC so MIL can not only have her flouncy Christmas holiday, she can whistle for the rest of Dec too?

OP posts:
GaryLurcher19 · 03/09/2024 18:04

PullTheBricksDown · 03/09/2024 18:03

Now work out when's the best point in 2025 to announce that her plan was so inspiring that you've booked for your household to go away this year!

Definitely do this.

PullTheBricksDown · 03/09/2024 18:03

Now work out when's the best point in 2025 to announce that her plan was so inspiring that you've booked for your household to go away this year!

angellinaballerina7 · 03/09/2024 17:47

What an absolute delight! Definitely book what you want to do, you’ve done enough of what everyone else asked for.

GaryLurcher19 · 03/09/2024 17:45

YANBU.

It'll be a nice break from the pattern and you would be wise to make the most of it.

Shinyandnew1 · 03/09/2024 17:45

DH mentioned about extended in-law family and Christmas

What does he mean-inviting other members of his family over instead?

carrotcard · 03/09/2024 17:44

What do you actually want to do for Christmas? Go and do that.

Howdull · 03/09/2024 17:43

Hmmm, you're not being unreasonable to book xmas stuff no, because they need to be booked now otherwise they sell out.

So just book what you want too. MIL will have to work around you.

And Christmas isn't about family at all, it's about the birth of Jesus. If you see family all year anyway, why do you have to see them at Christmas too?

TheLovleyChebbyMcGee · 03/09/2024 17:43

In theory its great to fill your early dec up with fun festive treats, but will she want to join you on those?!!

I've not brought up christmas yet, although we know our plans are very low key for once, I'm really looking forward to it!

Mistletoewench · 03/09/2024 17:43

Congratulations, my mum flounced off last year as we didn’t all dance to her tune and I actually stood up for myself.
interesting to see what happens this year …

YeahNoIDontThinkSo · 03/09/2024 17:42

You'd be unreasonable not to, IMO!

Velvian · 03/09/2024 17:42

YANBU, OP. That is wonderful news. I have been so tempted to book a Christmas holiday for years!

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