I’m never getting a pet again!

We have had 6 dogs in all. The last three were older rescue dogs and just the loveliest companions you can imagine. The first had been in two rescue places and was sent back by two adopters, yet he was well behaved and loving. We had each of these dogs for relatively short periods and had cancer, kidney failure and arthritis to deal with but each time we lost one we were bereft, Our dear Skye, the last, died last year. Every time we say we will not get another dog ever. After a period of time between 6 and 12 months that view seems to change. In October, 16 months after Skye died we are getting a puppy. This is a part of by life where feelings seem very subject to change.

The vet said it was a slipped disc that put compression on his spine. Its very uncommon in cats but happens more in dogs. We have no idea what caused it, maybe he has jumped off something and landed wrong (he has never been graceful like most cats are).

It was amazing how quickly he bounced back. I feel so lucky to still have him ❤

Possibly, I have a friend though who had a spaniel and when he died replaced with another spaniel and they're really struggling with him. Constantly comparing and not in a good way.

The one thing I've been careful to do when getting a new dog or cat after losing one, is to choose ones with different markings or, if a solid colour, a different colour because my memories of the ones I lost are so precious and I don't want them to get muddled with each other.

I have a 15 year old dog who I absolutely adore. I've had her since I was 19 and she brings me so much joy and companionship. I feel sick when I think about her passing and I don't think I could ever do it again either so you're not alone.

I feel the same op and my ddog is 7. He's our first family pet and adored by us all. He really is part of the family. I will be devastated when he's no longer here, but know I have to accept that dogs just don't live as long as humans.

I don't know if I would get another dog, but I am sure I would leave a gap. I'll probably use that time to do things we won't do know (as we don't want to leave him for more than a week, even with my parents). So I'll take a 3 week long haul holiday.

What springs to mind though is the saying 'better to have loved and lost than never to have loved before'. Dogs give us so much joy and companionship that I hope I can accept that the joy over numerous years will outweigh the pain.

Ive said the same for many years, but life is so empty without animals that I always benefit from them and love each and every one of them.
All my animals are rescues, so I think that while not having one will save me the pain of losing them, it will also mean thatt that rescue dog or cat could well spend much longer miserable in kennels also taking a space that another animal can use.

They've all been unique personalities that I grew to love. I've never regretted getting them.
A new animal brings so much joy it overcomes the bad bitsi, it's all part of the rich tapestry of life, better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all ime.

Yep, it's bloody awful, losing them. Actually I found losing my first dog harder than losing my dad, much as I loved him, because I didn't see him in every field, feel his loss every minute of the day. She'd been literally by my side for 13 years. But we've had three other dogs since her, and they've all been different. The one that died two years ago - took DH a great deal of time to come to terms with his death. DH was distraught. But we have a gorgeous girl now who is a rescue and they've bonded, thankfully. So never say never! The only reason I wouldn't get another dog is because I want to go travelling. But I've been saying that for years and then we've given in and got one so the travelling gets put off again! My mum felt the same as you and never did get another one. I think the pain is worth it though, hard as it is at the time.

Pets are just like family.

One of our beloved cats took not well when I was 9 months pregnant. He suddenly lost the use of his back legs and was dragging himself across the room, it was awful to see. It was late at night so we had to take him to the emergency vets and we both thought it was just to have him put to sleep as we didn't want him to be suffering, we were crying all the way there.

The vets kept him in and did an operation the next day on his spine (thank god for pet insurance otherwise we would never of be able to afford it). The day after that I was in hospital having our baby boy. I was so worried about the cat and also our other cat who was home alone without his brother for the first time, I kept sending my husband away to phone the vets for updates. The cat came home the day after me and the baby got home from hospital. He recovered so quickly it was amazing.

I was so thankful our baby boy will get to send time with our two beautiful cats and they can watch him grow up and love them and all animals as much as we do.

It doesn't work for everyone but I made a conscious decision when my first dog was about 8 to get another so that the loss would be tempered by the one that was left. When it eventually happened we'd also be 'gifted' a litter of puppies by a stray dog so, whilst it was painful the joy of new life was there.

Since then we've never had less than five dogs - again not practical for most people but it helps you see the circle of life and realise that love is completely limitless.

Your feelings are completely valid, op, I'm really glad she's alright.

Lost my old girl earlier this year and was blindsided by the intensity of the grief, it'll be some time before I could think about getting another - maybe I never will. But, I reacted differently when I lost my boy before her, the grief was no less painful but got my girl months later because I couldn't bear the emptiness in the house. All that love I had for my boy, I needed somewhere for it go.

Ultimately I think the joy & love pets bring us outweighs the grief but I think there will come I time - and maybe this is it - when I just can't face it anymore.

Sending love x

Every dog owner I know has swore the same as you. 'They are irreplaceable, I can't face doing this again, the pains too much' etc...

Also every dog owner I know got a new dog when the time finally came dispite swearing down they wouldn't. 'I can give this one a good life, he deserves it, it in previous dogs honor, its not a replacement its a new start' etc...

Swearing you wont do it before hand and not doing it once your faced with the emptiness you're desperate to fill is two completely different things.

I have more than one dog now because coming home to an empty house was the worst feeling I've ever had and I don't want to risk being dog free. I now have a very elderly and frail pug, and 2 younger dogs, but I have started to talk about the possibility of losing my old lady to prepare my daughter that dogs don't live forever.

Pet owners "get it", none pet owners don't.

You know what, they don't compare. Never will.

When we got our current dog....oh it was awful. A bitey, pain in the arse, clumsy, nightmare. I constantly compared her to our last dog. The canine love of my life. Never gave up on her though.

She's so different. Last dog was chill. This one is crazy. Last dog could just have her walk alongside us with no lead. This one would run into traffic to chase a bee. Could give the last dog a doggie roast dinner (oh I loved making her a roast), this one would shit for days if she had human food of any kind.

She doesn't compare. Because she's her own little dog personality. She likes different things, is scared of different things, likes being scratched in different places......

Honestly I'd say to anyone, just because of how strongly I felt about 'never again' when you feel ready go for it. They don't compare because they can't, it's a different dog! You'll never replace the dog you had. But you can make damn sure that there is one dog that's as cherished as it should be. Its a waste having all that doggie love stored and not spending it 🥰

I agree that the grief is horrendous to go through. Throughout my life I have lost 6 pets (5 dogs and 1 cat). We currently have two dogs and 1 cat, all getting on in years. My comfort is that we gave them the best life that we could, and that they were happy. I try to also adopt, which helps as well as adoption gives an animal a second chance at life. It is so hard though.

We had two dogs and the last one died 7 years ago. We won't be getting dogs again, we've thought about it but tbh we couldn't go through it all again, it was very painful.

Plus the world is a different place now for owning dogs. Too many bad dog owners around to make walks really enjoyable. No one seems to actually train their dogs anymore, just shout at them to come back!! I've seen too many dogs pushed around in dog prams and come to the conclusion the world has gone mad!

Plus rise of dangerous breeds increases chance of attacks on your own dogs. It's just too stressful owning dogs now.

My dog is 13. I do think we will be lucky to still have him next summer. It breaks my heart even thinking about him not being here.

We have said no more dogs. None will come close to him.

Cats, I will always have.

It's the worst thing about pets, I think almost every day about my old dog, and my two amazing cats, and it's been years now for two of them, and I have a new dog, but that's the pain of life isn't it - animals and humans, you can only avoid it by not having them in your life.

I can understand it - my parents say they couldn't get another dog at their age due to the risk of having to watch the slow decline of another one but we are all headed that way - I feel really proud of how well I looked after my cat for the last two years of her life and it gives me some comfort that we did our absolute best and she was well looked after by us and the vets.

My friends dog was getting old & had some health issues. He wasn't going to have long. She got a puppy. I have to say, I thought it was 'mean' at the time & thought her old boy (who I loved to pieces) deserved her full attention & a quiet life, not a mental puppy. I thought her reasoning of 'not wanting to be without a dog' was pretty selfish

it actually it worked out ok. Old Boy taught the puppy a lot of things like toileting & puppy seemed to bring some life & joy to old boy.

old Boy died in quite a traumatic wat & we were all devastated, but having the puppy around did help & as she's pretty much stuck at home I don't know how she would have coped being without a dog.

i think also as she had both for a bit, it didn't feel like she was replacing old boy with the puppy.

something to consider??

I completely get what you mean OP. My 2 dogs are old ladies now and it breaks my heart to think about the day they are no longer here. I just try and remember that grief is the price you pay for love. I adore them and they love me. I've given them the very best life I can and they have brought so much happiness into my life. It will break my heart but then they have been worth their weight in gold. I wouldn't have missed it for the world!

Yes the thing that really put me off getting anymore pets was watching two of them die of cancer in the last year. Its awful and so emotionally draining. We have an elderly cat remaining, so will probably have to go through it all again soon!

What a lovely way of thinking about it 💜