I’m never getting a pet again!

I hear you OP. Ours are only 3 and 5 and every so often I have a little cry thinking about when they won't be here any longer!

In fact, I saw a TikTok of a girl bawling her eyes out over her dog dying and then the camera pans round and the dog is sat there on the sofa, perfectly fit and healthy just looking at her like "what are you crying for?!". It's funny but also so real and heartbreaking.

All I can say is to keep cuddling them, caring for them, taking them for walks / to the beach / countryside / wherever is near to you (depending on what they're capable of obviously), giving them lots of treats and fuss, and when that dreaded day comes, you know you did all you can to give your dog the best possible life filled with love. And that's all we can do as dog owners ❤

For me personally, the grief - and it is intense, I'm still missing my boy dreadfully after a year and we have a new dog - is still out weighted by the joy.

But my next door neighbour some 30 years older told me he's found himself in a place where he just doesn't want the loss again, and so won't get another dog. And I can see how you might get there too.

I swore never yo get a dog after my beautiful alsation died. Unfortunately my son really wanted a cat (he's 18) so we now have a cat. He went missing for 7 weeks recently (he's back now) but oh my God I never want to go through that again either!

We thought our older dog was on the way out, she was lying about all day, seemed to have no get up and go, then we got a puppy and she got a new lease of life. She's 13 now and I've just noticed a lump under her armpit so need to get that seen to, hoping it's just a cyst. But the reason I got a puppy was to kind of ease the pain of when she does go, so I have another to love.

I've said we aren't having any more animals after our cat goes (age 11 so probably ages yet). I lost our first cat to either an infection or poisoning. From symptoms to passing away was a couple of hours it broke my heart. I had him from a kitten and he was my company whilst DH worked shifts (pre kid days). We then adopted two cats, lost one of them 2 years ago from cancer.

We have young kids and people tell us that a dog would be great company for them to grow up with. Or Guinea pigs and hamsters, I can't deal with the heartache.

Aw OP it's really sad thinking about when the time comes and afterwards. I'm dreading it myself, my cat is 17. She's now got arthritis and it makes me so upset thinking one day she won't be with me anymore. I know I'll be inconsolable. My children keep asking for another cat or maybe a dog after she passes but I don't know how I'll feel, maybe one day.
I lost a dog when I was younger from cancer and I still miss him terribly to this day, nearly 20 years ago!

Aww my dog is Skye. I call her Skye Pie, Skyzy. Pipes, Pipey. My sister calls her Skye Beau. She answers to all. 🤣.
I bet you can’t wait to to get your new puppy. If you’re getting him/her in October am I right in thinking they’re only newborn squishy puppies.
RIP to your beautiful Skye.

I think it was Paul O’Grady who said to love an animal is to invite heartbreak into your life. I always say I won’t have any more but then I end up going on rescue sites and the inevitable happens. I do dread losing my dog though, he’s particularly special.

I know exactly how you feel OP, the love we share with them is so wonderful but losing them is as hard as losing a person for some.

My mum was adamant she wasn’t getting another cat after losing her 19 year old cat that she got as an 8 week old kitten. After a few months she got a rescue cat who was rescued from awful circumstances and actually she and my dad now work for the charity DCat came from. So losing their previous pet has in fact taken them in a new direction in retirement and another cat has got a second chance in life which I think is lovely.

I have never had a dog but the last month of my cat’s life was very stressful and if I didn’t already have another cat it would have taken me a while to feel ready for the commitment again, and I absolutely love cats.

But I would have done eventually as I can only remember now how lovely and what brilliant company he was.

I grew up with a dog and we lost her when I was about 9 (black with a white breast and a mix of just about every breed)
She was my sister,I could tell her anything and she never judged me
She taught me to walk (my siblings and I would grab her fur,she'd stand up and start walking-wed move with her),she taught me how to behave around dogs,she taught me unconditional love (abusive parents)
She also taught me never to paint her nails red as you WILL get into trouble
I'm 46 now and still feel teary about losing her

My friends have a dog,and without that dog,I would never have met my partner (we 'met' online and I fell in love with 'his' dog)
He's our everything-hes the most special dog I've ever met-in his fur,he has a white line on his face and a white 'button' on his neck-i love pressing it and telling him 'beep beep'
It's 'our' thing-He sits and let's me do it
(We often have him to stay while his owners are on holiday and I love it when he gets into our bed-his claws in my arse,not so much)
He's getting old now and even thought he's not mine,I'll be in pieces when he leaves us

Ds rang me one day and said he was getting himself a dog from a rescue and he'd seen one 'I like the look of'
I begged him not to as he was a typical 'lad about town' and wasn't mature enough to own one
He ignored me and got him anyway
It's the best thing he ever did (bar giving me my first gd)
The dog is our everything-hes bombproof,lazy,loving,intelligent,loyal and amazing in everyway (and can guilt you into anything with his side-eye)
We adore him and are lucky enough to have him if ds goes on holiday

I'm dreading the day we lose them both-ive already had the conversation with ds about 'a week early is better than a day too late' and 'grief is the price we pay for love'

I've also asked him not to rush into getting another dog,and he's agreed that he'll know when the time is right (I'm not a controlling arse,ds will do what's right for him but trusts my advice)

Our dog is almost 15 and I find myself getting anxious at times wondering how dd and ds will cope with the loss. For now she is as fit as a fiddle, incredible really that out and about people think she's a young pup in comparison to their own 8 or 9 year old dogs. I suppose the worry is the price we pay for the way dogs worm their way into our lives and hearts.

I feel the same. We had three oldies pass away in the space of six years and were totally wrung out and traumatised by it. We've been without a dog for a year now and I can't see me getting another (though DH probably would). Alongside the grief, there's almost a weird sense of relief that the all the worry is gone. It was all too much.

I am so sorry I know exactly what you are saying we’re done this twice and the last one was 5 and half years ago 😔
i get it … please know that you’re not alone in feeling like this … we didn’t get any large pets for a while after losing our beloved Bichon … Pebbles
we had a couple of rescue budgies and then when they passed we got our Maisie … she’s beeen the healing touch we need but they never ever replace they add to the love and follow in their paw steps

your baby knows you love them … you will help them without realising it. Its a whole different subject but from my experience it’s not the end
my heart goes out to you with the anxiety ..it’s all consuming but believe me your Furbaby will be helped by you whatever and they will forever be grateful to you

We lost our old boy a couple of months ago. It was heartbreaking. Someone said to me 'the first dog is the dog that gives you so much it's the reason for the second dog'.

We will get another one but not yet.

I'm glad she's ok.

I'm really sorry to hear what you're going through @Whynotmakeittwo

I have five dogs currently (three fosters, two my own). My eldest dog is 11 and when she goes, I know I'll get a new dog asap (once I've vetted a breeder etc) because I need something to take my mind off the loss and to funnel my grief into and to focus on. Even if I'm not ready, the alternative is sitting there and festering whilst I miss my dog - because that is what I'm like and I know from bitter experience that waiting does not make me cope any better. But, it's a very individual process and what works for one person really doesn't for another.

We do it to ourselves, because of the unconditional love we get in return. It makes the heartache worth it in the end.

It is very upsetting when they go isn't it? We lost our oldest cat (aged 17) a couple of years ago, and we asked the vet if we could have her cremated, but they said she will have to be taken away and it could be several weeks.

We couldn't let her go. 😢 We brought her home and buried her in the garden. Just at the side of the house (more towards the front,) in the sunshine, slightly under the bushes where she used to lie in the Spring and Summer months. It was comforting to us knowing she was there, resting in peace and tranquillity, in the place she loved for so many years.

Aww, how exciting! And waiting a while before you commit is such a good idea. I’m surprised a rescue centre allowed a previous poster to take home a dog just a month after they’d lost their much loved pet.

I'd set a date maybe to do a PTS, this will lessen your worry of looking after her all the time, and gives you time to do a little grieving beforehand as well as after.

We do borrow my doggy and end up usually having a beautiful doggy ( different ones) 4 or 5 times a year for 3 or 4 days- or 3 weeks in one case. It gives us a lift without the long term commitment or worry - I recommend it if you love dogs and have a suitable home.

My girl is only 3 almost 4 and often sit here crying thinking about when she goes. Therefore I can only imagine how heart broken I’ll be when it does happen. I’m crying now typing this, and she’s currently in the garden with the zoomies.🤣
Miss my wonderful mum and dad as I do and please believe when I say this is no disrespect to their souls but losing my dog is going to hurt even more.
Part of me thinks I’d have to go out and buy a mischievous fun loving affectionate little pup straight away to try and take away some of the emptiness. However would having a different dog remind me even more. I guess I’ll just have to wait and see.
What ever you do please don’t watch Marley and Me especially the ending.

I lost my darling chocolate lab boy in February 2022. I was heartbroken and I stayed in bed crying all day the day after he was PTS. I'd had him for over 13 years from being 7 weeks old. I am still devastated, he'd been at my side through some absolutely terrible times and was really the only constant in my life. My wider family don't understand, to them he was just a dog, to me he was my world. I will never get a dog again, I can't go through the heartbreak all over again and I never, ever want to set foot inside a vets again. I get my dog "fix" by following and donating to a dog charity, "Dogs 4 Rescue". I shall miss my boy forever.

I lost my beautiful 14yo old boy in April. I cried for 4 days solid after he'd gone, I thought I'd never stop, and I miss him every day.

But what I regret is worrying so much about it for the last few years of his life. I spent so much time worrying, getting upset every time he was ill, or off his food, or one of his legs wasn't working so well. Worrying is natural of course, but it can't change anything. Just try to make the most of whatever time you have left with him.

It was peaceful when my boy went, and he looked so relaxed. It was done with dignity and respect, and I can't be sorry about it - it was his time. I miss him terribly (I'm crying writing this) but what helped me was thinking that everyone who has ever had a pet has to go through this. It normalises it, and makes the grief a little less in some way.

Pets wriggle so far into your heart, and leave such a hole when they're gone. But that's ok. It's what they're meant to do. I'm so glad we had our dog in our lives.

I'm not getting another one, but that's purely because we are on the edge of retirement and want to travel more. The grief hasn't put me off, because I can see that the memories and the love outweigh any hurt tenfold.

Most of the time my husband and I have had three dogs at once - not deliberately, it's just worked out that way. We have a dog each and when my mum became too frail to care for hers he moved in with us as well. My beloved terrier died during the pandemic. Within 48 hours I had made enquiries with breeder and set up an appointment to view a litter as soon as we were allowed. So we were back to three dogs in just a few weeks. Because we are now in our 60's I can't imagine that we will ever have a puppy again but I like to hope that if I outlive my terrier I could give a good home to a dog in need.

The grief is real and so painful but the thought of a future without a dog is even worse.

I have a 17 yo cat. He's definitely slowing down and only goes out to the toilet these days. I'm dreading the day when we don't have him. He's the only pet OH has ever had so I think he'll be more upset.

I don't know if I'd like another one after him. If I did it would be quite a while after but I like the company a cat gives us.

I've had a wee collage of 4 photos of him made and they're hanging on our bedroom wall so he'll always be with us.