Friend should pay me back?

Doing the OP a favour???
Oh give over 😂😂😂

Friend 1 made the commitment to go to the spa. They dropped out of that, and in recognition of their flakeyness, invited OP to take friend 2 which friend 1 would still pay for. Friend 1 should absolutely pay for this. If friend 1 hadn't offered to pay, OP might have sought a refund, friend 2 might not have accepted the spa day if they had been asked to pay for it etc.

Hell would freeze over before I asked friend 2 to pay for something which was offered to them as a freebie. That said, if I was friend 2, I would have offered to pay or at least contribute in some way before accepting the freebie.

I'd respond to friend 1 and let them know that as they're going back on their word (after already going back on their commitment) you are having to pay the full cost of the spa day. How they respond to that should guide you on keeping or ending this friendship!

I think it's a tough one as friend one should not have said she would pay and the not pay

I assume it was on that basis you told another friend they could go and other friend would pay, however, you should perhaps not have done this without payment first IYSWIM

On the other hand it does seem odd for another friend to go and the first friend to pay and I bet she said it to be polite. I still think she's wrong to do that.

Yeah I'd not ask the 2nd friend for the money but my friendship with the flop would be over with. If you say you are paying then that's that

@Brefugee just reread and think I may have misunderstood your post. If so - sorry about that! On second read you might be saying that Friend 1 should have been clearer from the outset rather than just refusing to pay. But I don't think the OP should ask Friend 2 to pay as that would be really cheeky.

You do realise that the Friend 2 might only have agreed to attend last minute because it was free, but might not have otherwise been able to afford to go. It's much easier to find someone willing to fill a free space than to find someone willing to pay. Friend 1 is absolutely the unreasonable one who reneged on her commitments, twice.

I'm sure most people reading are equally glad that with your way of thinking you're not their friend.

Are you sure she didn't mean that she would pay if you couldn't find someone else to take her place? Since you did find someone it is reasonable for that person to pay.

Gosh I'm glad some of you are vt my "friends"

A normal person would have said: I'll pay my share if you can't find someone who will go with you and pay half.

She offered to pay so in theory she should. Ask the friend who did go if she will pay. Otherwise you learned an expensive lesson

If I'd been offered a free trip, went, and then was asked to pay, I'd say no and think you were a CF.

Friend 1 is in the wrong, and you should stop paying for her, obviously. And other people. Lesson learned.

I’m glad I’m not your friend. You absolutely should have asked the 2nd friend to pay or postponed the whole thing to get both ur money back. Awful friend.

Forgot to add I’d probably be considering my friendship with this friend as the way she has acted isn’t fair. She didn’t pay you back, told you to take someone else and then complained about paying you even though she said she would.

You and your friend are both in the wrong.

You are in the wrong for booking without getting payment from friend first. (I’ve learnt this lesson too). You could have asked the friend you took in place to pay towards the ticket, even if it wasn’t the full whack.

Your friend is wrong for not paying you back, going on holiday and then refusing to pay despite saying she would.

Because whoever filled the space was doing OP a favour. It's not the same as being the person originally planning this with OP and agreeing to split the costs. When that person bailed, they owed the OP the costs and wanted the space filled so OP wouldn't be alone. The new friend didn't plan a trip to a spa. They were offered a freebie so the OP wouldn't be alone after the first friend let her down and owed her the costs and agree to cover them. I don't know what's so hard to comprehend about this? Sure the second friend could be nice and offer a contribution, but they are in an entirely different role to the first friend and there was never and shouldn't be an onus on them to pay for a thing they didn't choose.

She didnt go.

YOU should of told her,
Ofcourse i dont expect you to pay as you arent coming, i will get someone else to come and they can pay’

But you didnt.
You said ‘yes, you can pay and i will take someone else for free’

What the actual hell !

Verbal contract. Do you have a text?

I read the post! Thanks!
My comment still stands!

What if friend 2 couldn't normally have afforded something like this though? Totally unfair to ask her IMO.

Then she got asked to go on holiday and said she couldn’t make it anymore, but she’d still pay and I should take someone else

Some of these responses are ridiculous! You can't offer someone a free spa day and then ask for payment AFTER the event! Who knows what friend 2's finances are like? I've certainly been in situations in life where I couldn't have afforded an unexpected expense like that - if offered for free I would have been incredibly grateful but realistically could not have spent money I didn't have on a luxury like a spa day. And ffs even if I could it's a shitty thing to do to move the goalposts like that!

Friend 1 has obviously either overspent on holiday or been moaning about it to whoever she went with and they've agreed it's unfair. Either way she's a crappy friend. Sorry though OP, I don't know what you can do other than absorb the cost if friend 1 doesn't come to her senses - otherwise I'm afraid you may lose friend 2 as well 😕

But she might not have found someone if they had to pay. It’s generally easier to find someone when it’s free