To make a birthday cake and not cut it

Cupcakes are a great idea, especially if you're not eating the cake at the party. But then you put the candle in the birthday child's cupcake, or put all the cupcakes together with candles in a few etc.

Bringing a birthday cake to a birthday party and not cutting it is just rude, it's not the etiquette at all.

They can, and their parents definitely can.

They’ve got eyes. Of course they can tell, their parents definitely can.

Absolutely they can. Even if they can't though, their parents will and you'll be labelled as the show off cheapskate who thought her guests weren't good enough to eat the proper cake.

If course they will know.

Also, at our parties, we eat the cake at the party! I don't really understand the UK thing of taking the cake home in serviettes; I don't mean it's rude (it isn't), but I think it's nicer to eat the cake at the party.

I think having a second cake just for the family is fine and normal, but bringing such a cake to the party and showing it before putting it back in the box looks so rude to me. "You're not good enough to eat the main cake, but I still want your compliments on my fondant skills." We usually have two cakes (one on the day itself, one for the party) but we certainly don't show people cakes that we have no intention of serving to them.

Cakes are made to be eaten. 🤷‍♀️

This is what I do for all of my children’s parties… I make themed cake of their choice, take it, have candles and the children sing. I also make themed cupcakes to match the cake, which are as beautifully decorated, and individually boxed before we get to the party… that way I can be fully present throughout the party. The main cake then comes home for our family party, so no wastage… and no trying to hastily cut up and wrap cake to stuff into party bags… it literally breaks me when we attend parties and people wrap cake in napkins or kitchen roll… transforming a beautifully moist piece of iced cake into something resembling old cardboard and mush by the time it gets home…

I did this! My friend made an amazing cake and cupcakes for my son. We gave the cupcakes out in the individual cupcake boxes which was so much easier!

I don’t get why people on here are so baffled at the idea that some kids have a party on a different day to their birthday, or that they might celebrate with their school/nursery friends at a noisy soft play place and have a family party with grandparents and aunties etc.
Absolutely no-one is "baffled" by more than one celebration @SnowflakeSmasher86 !

The issue is bringing a fancy cake to celebration #1 just for show then taking it away to be eaten at celebration #2.

What op is talking about is showing off the fancy cake at the party then whisking it away and giving the guests something else, which is weird

Its this. If you think the fancy cake is impractical - do cupcakes or biscuits. The weird bit is doing the large cake to show it off.

I hate the idea of bringing a cake "for show" or basically for photos if its not going to be shared.

If you pop a napkin over the cake slice to put it in the bag it survives fine. Most children are grabbing it straight from the bag to eat on the way out!

I don’t get why people on here are so baffled at the idea that some kids have a party on a different day to their birthday, or that they might celebrate with their school/nursery friends at a noisy soft play place and have a family party with grandparents and aunties etc.
I'm not baffled by that, that's what mine have done. I'm just not precious enough about my cakes to think they have to be preserved for family but shown off to the adoring public at the first event. It's ridiculous

Then have a cake for the party then cake for bday at home? What op is talking about is showing off the fancy cake at the party then whisking it away and giving the guests something else, which is weird

I do this sometimes too. A plainer bottom tier that’s easier to cut for lots of guests and a fancier to top tier to take home and have with family on its own.

I don’t get why people on here are so baffled at the idea that some kids have a party on a different day to their birthday, or that they might celebrate with their school/nursery friends at a noisy soft play place and have a family party with grandparents and aunties etc.

I make cakes for a living. Plenty of people have a ‘stunt’ cake for show and then it can be used for the party and the actual birthday. Usually we’d make a tray bake in similar coloured icing to give out so it’s exactly the same cake (nothing to do with guests “not being good enough for the real cake - it’s the same exact cake just easier to cut if it’s a tray bake!).

I’ve done cupcakes to give out before and customers have said they had complaints from party guests that they didn’t get “a piece of cake” despite getting a cake with its own little decoration in an individual bag, which is going to look nicer and travel better than a slice of squishy cake!

I do this and I'm not afraid to admit it despite the objections here!
My kids always leave the cake in the bag to get mouldy, turns out so do a lot of their friends! So I would rather eat it myself! Kids don't know the difference anyway if they even unwrap it. I eat the nice cake with family and give something else out in party bags.

What's the point of making the cake if you're not sharing it out with your child's friends at the party. I thought that was the idea of having a birthday cake. Who'll be eating it if not the party guests? I feel it's a bit 'showy' to take it, let everyone admire it but not cut into it & hand it out. You don't need to wrap it & give it at the end of the party. Give it out after the candles have been blown out & the singing of 'Happy Birthday' has stopped.

This

It is a bit performative
Look at the fabulous cake I made!!!!!
Oh no, its not for actually eating (at least not by you lot)

it's cringe