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AIBU?

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Original poster

Not removing sunglasses - unreasonable?

423 replies

coxesorangepippin · 31/08/2024 15:49

Met up with a friend yesterday, who introduced me to her sister.

We sat outside, it was sunny.

The sister did not remove her sunglasses the entire time (2 hours).

It bothered me. I couldn't see her eyes.

Aibu?

OP posts:
79pinkballoons · 31/08/2024 21:29

I've never heard of wearing sunglasses while meeting people being rude! I have sensitive eyes and almost always wear sunglasses outside. I don't see how me squinting at someone while saying hello would be preferable to wearing sunglasses.

housethatbuiltme · 31/08/2024 21:27

Thinkbiglittleone · 31/08/2024 20:52

So you wouldn't talk to someone who is blind or who has false eyes because 'no ones home'... really disgusting ableism

That's hilarious - what a jump ConfusedConfused

Saying 'the lights are on but nobodies home' (meaning 'stupid') about a disability aid is fucking disgusting.

I'm not the only person that commented that correlation too so not a 'jump'.

Thinkbiglittleone · 31/08/2024 21:23

I meant it that I wouldn't be able to read them as well.

Not that I wouldnt talk to a blind person or someone with false eyes....not a jump at all EnvyConfused

Thinkbiglittleone · 31/08/2024 21:22

What did you mean by ‘no one’s home’ then? Spell it out.

I meant it that I wouldn't be able to read them as well.

Not that I would talk to a blind person or someone with false eyes....not a jump at all EnvyConfused

MartinCrieffsLemon · 31/08/2024 21:20

itsgettingweird · 31/08/2024 19:42

Would it really kill you to raise your sunglasses for all of 15 seconds to acknowledge and make eye contact when introduced to someone new? It’s basic manners.

Is it really beyond your intellect to understand that many people - like me - wouldn't be able to see your fucking face if I raised my sunglasses.

Do you ask people in a wheelchair why they couldn't just stand for a second to shake your hand?

What's with it with ablist people 🙄

It's gross isn't it?
"Make yourself suffer or you're rude"

SecondFavouriteDinosaur · 31/08/2024 21:18

Thinkbiglittleone · 31/08/2024 21:16

But you said ‘no one’s home’, which is clearly offensive. Implying that someone who can’t make eye contact is somehow deficient

No, not deficient at all.

What did you mean by ‘no one’s home’ then? Spell it out.

SonicTheHodgeheg · 31/08/2024 21:17

Really shocked how many people believe in the taking sunglasses off “rule” (is it a few seconds or a few mins because I’ve read both on this thread)
Taking my glasses off would have me squinting because of the sun and lack of ability to see so the other person isn’t seeing my normal relaxed face. Is my contorted face really better than me keeping my sunglasses on so I’m comfortable and able to have a normal conversation ? Do people who are shortsighted and need to lip read get a pass on this “rule”?

Thinkbiglittleone · 31/08/2024 21:16

But you said ‘no one’s home’, which is clearly offensive. Implying that someone who can’t make eye contact is somehow deficient

No, not deficient at all.

BeachParty · 31/08/2024 21:15

Thinkbiglittleone · 31/08/2024 21:11

It’s not. If you’re saying “no one’s home” when you can’t see their eyes that’s massively ableist. Sometimes the truth hurts

Nothing hurts, as I know I'm not an ableist. ConfusedConfused

I simply meant I prefer eye contact on greeting someone (who can) as i can't always read people with no eye contact. So I could understand the posters comment who originally said it.

How do you know they can though if you've only just met?

SecondFavouriteDinosaur · 31/08/2024 21:12

Thinkbiglittleone · 31/08/2024 21:11

It’s not. If you’re saying “no one’s home” when you can’t see their eyes that’s massively ableist. Sometimes the truth hurts

Nothing hurts, as I know I'm not an ableist. ConfusedConfused

I simply meant I prefer eye contact on greeting someone (who can) as i can't always read people with no eye contact. So I could understand the posters comment who originally said it.

But you said ‘no one’s home’, which is clearly offensive. Implying that someone who can’t make eye contact is somehow deficient.

Cosyblankets · 31/08/2024 21:11

Wear!
Not were!
I blame autocorrect

Thinkbiglittleone · 31/08/2024 21:11

It’s not. If you’re saying “no one’s home” when you can’t see their eyes that’s massively ableist. Sometimes the truth hurts

Nothing hurts, as I know I'm not an ableist. ConfusedConfused

I simply meant I prefer eye contact on greeting someone (who can) as i can't always read people with no eye contact. So I could understand the posters comment who originally said it.

MartinCrieffsLemon · 31/08/2024 21:07

My glasses are reactive

I can't exactly control then being sunglasses when it's SUNNY

Sirzy · 31/08/2024 21:01

Thinkbiglittleone · 31/08/2024 20:59

Not really a jump
Yes it is, a massive jump to start calling me ableist.

It’s not. If you’re saying “no one’s home” when you can’t see their eyes that’s massively ableist. Sometimes the truth hurts

ApolloandDaphne · 31/08/2024 20:59

You are being weird. If I am sitting in the sun my sunglasses are on. I wouldn't be able to sit outside otherwise.

Thinkbiglittleone · 31/08/2024 20:59

Not really a jump
Yes it is, a massive jump to start calling me ableist.

Cosyblankets · 31/08/2024 20:58

Clue is in the name
Sunglasses
Glasses you were in the sun
It was sunny
She wore them
It's what you do

BeachParty · 31/08/2024 20:55

Thinkbiglittleone · 31/08/2024 20:52

So you wouldn't talk to someone who is blind or who has false eyes because 'no ones home'... really disgusting ableism

That's hilarious - what a jump ConfusedConfused

Not really a jump, as you've just said you think "no one's home" if they're wearing dark glasses - which a lot of visually impaired/ blind people do.
You want to see their eyes and that's not always possible.

OhMrPleasant · 31/08/2024 20:54

I was always taught that wearing sunglasses in company was rude.

You were misinformed.

Thinkbiglittleone · 31/08/2024 20:52

So you wouldn't talk to someone who is blind or who has false eyes because 'no ones home'... really disgusting ableism

That's hilarious - what a jump ConfusedConfused

housethatbuiltme · 31/08/2024 20:36

Thinkbiglittleone · 31/08/2024 19:43

I do agree with this, it's nice to greet someone with eye contact for a minute or 2, then pop them back down, and the PP who says it's like no one is home if they are black glasses as so much of a conversation can be about eye contact.

Show quote history

So you wouldn't talk to someone who is blind or who has false eyes because 'no ones home'... really disgusting ableism.

housethatbuiltme · 31/08/2024 20:34

Sallyh87 · 31/08/2024 19:38

Is this a thing, that people would be upset about?! I have very pale blue eyes and struggle with sun, I wear sunglasses even in winter sometimes. Why would you need to see her eyes? Unless this is a drip feed and you were playing poker ?

wouldn't glasses reflect the cards and thus be in OPs best interest?

Topseyt123 · 31/08/2024 20:33

AlwaysKindaKnewYoudBeTheDeathOfMe · 31/08/2024 19:14

I don't really buy the concept that wearing sunglasses is rude.

Says fucking who?

Says only MN. It's utter bollocks.

Topseyt123 · 31/08/2024 20:32

RoseUnder · 31/08/2024 18:51

Would it really kill you to raise your sunglasses for all of 15 seconds to acknowledge and make eye contact when introduced to someone new? It’s basic manners.

Show quote history

It would never occur to me to do it. Fuck that.

housethatbuiltme · 31/08/2024 20:29

AlwaysKindaKnewYoudBeTheDeathOfMe · 31/08/2024 19:14

I don't really buy the concept that wearing sunglasses is rude.

Says fucking who?

Yep people here have made up themselves that it rude but think its entirely ok for them to demand disabled people give up their medical aid just for their own sense of importance.

Do they hear themselves? What you can't stop your disability for even 15 seconds to a minute... how dare you. Your medical condition makes ME uncomfortable don't you know. Obviously my made up comfort comes about your actual physical comfort that has been diagnosed by doctors etc...

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