To think pregnancy ruined your body?

I've voted YABU due to the fact I think you've been lucky more than anything.

I had sickness so bad I lost a lot of weight during pregnancy but also lost 2 teeth.

I also had a c section and was pushed by midwives so much I ended up back in hospital a week after birth with a torn muscle, this set me back 2 months in my recovery before I was able to walk unaided. It took 1.5 years before I was able to walk for than 30 minutes without agony in my pelvis. This made exercise very difficult so I piled a lot of weight back on.

I also had a big allergic reaction to the tape from my section which gave me blisters all down from my belly to vagina and I have blister scars along my stretch marks. I also became allergic to sanitary towels.

C section scar is a mess and numb and uncomfortable.

I've also only had 1 child as my body couldn't go through all this again.

No one ever congratulated you on your pregnancy, but talked about ruining your body?

… I’d be looking to move OP. And find some new friends.

My appearance hasnt been too damaged by pregnancy either- only been left with 3 visible signs really. EMCS scar which is still quick thick and bumpy, boobs are a bit ravaged, bloody titting neverending hemorrhoids 🤣 Obvs the piles are a bit annoying but I don't care about the other 2. Still in pre-baby jeans even though I went from 50kg to 68kg, and no stretch marks.

I think it's luck of the draw! I am fit and active but have friends the same who have more obvious lasting signs of pregnancy, and other friends who did less/no exercise who look exactly as they did pre-baby. They're all gorgeous though and I think pregnancy stretch marks look amazing.

*edited as forgot to factor in teeth! They have definitely had their little calcium stores depleted 😈 so maybe 4 visible signs

Having stopped my second stint of breastfeeding I’m really feeling this right now!
I can’t remember if they ever went back to having more volume the first time, there wasn’t a huge amount of time really between ending BF and getting pregnant again so it’s hard to say but this time they are so deflated!

When someone needs congratulations and attention after a baby, it usually means the baby isn't enough for them. This hyperfocus on how good you look is also evidence of this, the fact you've now come in an anonymous forum because you aren't getting enough attention in the real world of your looks... 🚩

I thought I’d be ok too given my mom is in incredible shape after 4 kids, but no.. it did not help me 🤣

And the comments on other threads today just got me thinking about it again. It would have been nice to get a congratulations and something positive said at the time.

Congratulations for what?

Congratulations on what though?

Congratualtions you were fortunate that pregnancy hasn’t irreparably damaged your body? Congratulations for not looking different?

I’m glad you “bounced back” but the reality is so many women don’t.

I was devastated for months. I would cry so much every time I would shower and see my body. I breastfed, it doesn’t help lose weight! It made me gain more.

I was a fit, slim, slender woman before babies, loved my body shape and regularly wore dresses and clothes that showed it.

I had multiple miscarriages, these too altered my body.

I then got pregnant with current pregnancy and I’ve lost so much weight - here’s me being hopeful I’ll get my old body back but honestly I cried and cried so much

i got stretch marks all over my tummy - the only one in my family to do so, too. My belly button is so big when it used to be so small.
I lost my waist, my ribs expanded… it wasn’t pretty for me.

I sound so shallow reading this back, but honestly it affected me a lot more than I expected it to. I love what my body can do - grow a beautiful human, and for that I’m so grateful but I went through a traumatic birthing experience too - it all adds up.

anyway! Let’s see what happens this time 🤣 I imagine the crying will come back. I will have to find a way to lose the weight faster this time as I have weddings within 6 months after and I don’t plan to buy new outfits to fit an enlarged body

Also everyone is obsessed with fitting into their old jeans after pregnancy but for me it’s my old bras - my boobs are actually smaller since I stopped breastfeeding but my back size is bigger - I’ve gone from a 32D bra to a 36B?

I’ll admit I’m jealous of you all, I have internal varicose veins, am always dry , bad back, dodgy tummy … the list goes on. But look I’ve 4 fab boys so happy with that!!!

You can’t control the experiences of other people.

Perhaps you’re also too fixated on looks and the visual impact of pregnancy if that is what you deemed to be a positive outcome of pregnancy.

Remembering when you fitted back into your old jeans isn’t a success, nor is it a failure not to.

All this bollocks about "bouncing back" and "ruined bodies" is another harmful symptom of a society that only values stereotypically attractive young women. You're celebrating that your body is still as attractive as it was before because you've bought into the idea that women that bear signs of pregnancy and childbirth - loose skin, weight gain, stretch marks etc are less attractive than those who don't have those.

I agree with OP up to a point. Before giving birth, all I heard was horror stories and I admit I was scared. A few more positive stories might be a good thing.

On stretch marks, I know someone who asked her gp before she conceived, how to avoid stretch marks, and he told her to walk at least 5 miles every day. So she walked to &from work from that point until she was 7 months gone. Had her DS, no stretch marks. Years later I worked for a search &rescue team. All of us were used to walking up to 20 miles in a day if needed. We worked at least one search a week and one long training session. None of the ladies in the team ended up with stretch marks including me. I've always wondered if that was just anecdotal or if the GP was right.

Trouble is, not everyone can arrange their day to spend 1.5 hours walking.

I’m confused by your thread title as clearly you don’t think pregnancy ruined your body?

I don’t have stretch marks but I used to run 40+ miles per week before getting pregnant then had to stop completely due to bleeding then PGP so my body now is very different. As pp said the main difference is I don’t care so much now as I would have done pre-pregnancy!

It’s just luck OP - I think everyone knows some people bounce back, some are left with serious issues and/or empty balloon tits, and most people are in between.

I'm similar to you OP in that I had one at 38, loved being pregnant and stayed fit and healthy.

I'm now two stone overweight because of wine and chips and can't seem to kick either!

Ps it wasn't all fun and games though. I lost baby number two late in pregnancy which is probably where the comfort eating comes from.

That sounds amazing OP im glad you had a great a great pregnancy. Mine were bloody awful the whole way through I vomited constantly with all three pregnancies the whole nine months, and I'm left with so many issues still suffer from SPD due to my pelvis still being misaligned after physio, painful varicose veins, back and shoulder pain from the random position I ended up in during my final push on third baby and stretch marks galore but it's also still the most important and amazing thing I have ever done and totally worth it all. Me and my best friend were pregnant at the same time and sailed through feeling better than ever like you. I wish everyone could feel like you did and am genuinely glad to hear stories like yours

Changed it but didn't ruin it.

I think a lot of it is down to diet and being overwhelmed, a bit tired and too stressed to eat and exercise well.

I see lots of people (including myself) who are overweight after children. They say it’s because of having children but really I think it’s from caring for them and feeling like you have no time/poor diet as generally time poor

It isn’t an ‘excuse’ because being healthy and exercising can 100% be done but it is quite a bit harder so lots of us don’t bother