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AIBU?

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Original poster

To feel devastated after being blocked by a friend, especially before my holiday?

36 replies

Curiousminds123 · 30/08/2024 19:50

I’ve recently been blocked by a close friend, and it’s really affecting me. We had a good conversation the last time we spoke, and had plans for yesterday. Didn’t hear anything and now I’m blocked.

This situation is especially hard for me because I’m about to go on holiday tomorrow, and it feels like this has completely ruined my mood. I’m feeling confused and upset because I thought our friendship was strong.

AIBU to feel this way, and how should I handle this situation moving forward, especially since I’m about to leave for a trip?

OP posts:
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PerkyOchrePeer · 23/04/2025 20:41

If someone blocked me I wouldn't care I just think oh well and move on it's not worth it if they can block for no reason without telling you then they sound really nasty and I have blocked someone before only because they were rude to me and I didn't want to say anything I just thought I'll move on so I blocked them

HeadacheEarthquake · 30/08/2024 23:13

Any trusted mutual friends you can ask? If you've truly done nothing then she may be in trouble

If she's in a bad place and expected you to reach out before her visit to reassure her she may have struggled with feelings of rejection that are not your fault but do occur when the black dog rears its head...

Sux2buthen · 30/08/2024 23:10

Uglybetty12234 · 30/08/2024 22:47

Blocked messages don't get delivered after being unblocked 🤨🤔 unless I'm wrong.

On WhatsApp I think you're right, they never send

Uglybetty12234 · 30/08/2024 22:47

Blocked messages don't get delivered after being unblocked 🤨🤔 unless I'm wrong.

Reallybadidea · 30/08/2024 22:07

This is such an awful thing to happen, you're not overreacting at all. There's nothing you could possibly have done unknowingly that would merit this kind of treatment. Especially since she presumably knows you're going on holiday.

I think you need to leave the ball in her court now but it's ok to feel sad about it, just keep telling yourself that you don't deserve to be treated in this way Flowers

TomatoSandwiches · 30/08/2024 21:47

I can't be doing with people like this, op just be grateful you no longer have to put up with this shite, forget her, enjoy your holiday and try to make better friends.

KurtShirty · 30/08/2024 21:42

It’s awful op, so painful to be in the receiving end of this. I read a brilliant book about ostracism a few years ago having been deeply affected by someone doing this to me in a particularly awful way. the final chapter of the book concludes that some people use ostracism as an alternative to conflict resolution and people like this should be avoided because the behaviour is so harmful and so likely to happen. So yes it’s painful but also, you might want to think about whether you even want to have contact with somebody who does this

YourFluentCrab · 30/08/2024 21:41

Have they been in contact now? I've got a friend that does this whenever life is overwhelming

Idontjetwashthefucker · 30/08/2024 21:41

Maybe he's in prison

89redballoons · 30/08/2024 21:39

YANBU to be very upset by this, no. I'm going through a friend breakup at the moment (probably) and it really sucks. It's worse than a romantic breakup in some ways.

If it helps, I spent 50 minutes of therapy this week asking my therapist if I was being unreasonable to be so upset about the situation, and she confirmed I wasn't!

Original poster
Curiousminds123 · 30/08/2024 21:05

LadyTiredWinterBottom2 · 30/08/2024 21:03

Did you turn up as planned?

Show quote history

Yes, it was a planned visit to come round

OP posts:
Original poster
Curiousminds123 · 30/08/2024 21:04

i noticed today that they had read my msgs on WhatsApp today, but after they had already blocked me yesterday (WhatsApp shows the time msgs are read if blue tick settings are on)

OP posts:
LadyTiredWinterBottom2 · 30/08/2024 21:03

Curiousminds123 · 30/08/2024 21:00

Yes deffo firm plans, we had spoken about it just before. The day came, no answers to any of my contact asking if they’re okay etc, called me but I missed the call, and then I called back, and sent a few msg as had not heard back. Within hours I was blocked everywhere

Show quote history

Did you turn up as planned?

Original poster
Curiousminds123 · 30/08/2024 21:00

Spirallingdownwards · 30/08/2024 20:52

You say you had plans for yesterday but didn't hear anything. Do you think she thought they were firm plans and turned up but you didn't because you hadn't heard anything so that is why she is cross?

Yes deffo firm plans, we had spoken about it just before. The day came, no answers to any of my contact asking if they’re okay etc, called me but I missed the call, and then I called back, and sent a few msg as had not heard back. Within hours I was blocked everywhere

OP posts:
Itiswhysofew · 30/08/2024 20:57

They obviously don't think anything of upsetting their friend.

Put it to one side and enjoy your holiday. If you want to when you're back, deal with it then.

rubeelum · 30/08/2024 20:54

This is nuts behaviour. I’d be going round to a) check they’re ok and b) if they are discuss why they’ve done this.

sonjadog · 30/08/2024 20:52

So sorry this has happened to you, OP. I was ghosted in July by a close friend after he did something hurtful to me and I told him how I felt (calmly and non-accusingly). It just before I was going on annual leave and honestly, the whole thing completely ruined my holiday and whole summer. It really hurts, I know. For what its worth, I was so very sad about it for the first month, but now I am calmer and more pragmatic about the whole thing. Try to enjoy your holiday as best you can.

Spirallingdownwards · 30/08/2024 20:52

You say you had plans for yesterday but didn't hear anything. Do you think she thought they were firm plans and turned up but you didn't because you hadn't heard anything so that is why she is cross?

Flippinec · 30/08/2024 20:49

PeachBlossom1234 · 30/08/2024 20:21

My ride-or-die best friend did this to me too and 2 years later I still have no idea why or what I did and it hurts like hell. I let myself feel sad and then moved on….its all you can do unfortunately.

Same thing happened to me. It made me very sad until I was able to accept that the friendship obviously wasn't what I thought it was if she didn't even have the decency to explain what I'd supposedly done. She and her narcissistic DH had loads of form for falling out with people for little/no reason though and me and my DH did used to joke that at some point it would happen to us...

EmeraldRoulette · 30/08/2024 20:43

I’m sorry OP

I can’t believe how often we see this

forgotmypassagain · 30/08/2024 20:38

Ignore her and protect yourself.

Fedup92 · 30/08/2024 20:35

Ignore her and enjoy your holiday.

BeckiWithAnI · 30/08/2024 20:26

If they have form for this kind of thing then they aren’t a friend. Friends can be relied upon. This is just emotional abuse and you are letting it happen.

PeachBlossom1234 · 30/08/2024 20:21

My ride-or-die best friend did this to me too and 2 years later I still have no idea why or what I did and it hurts like hell. I let myself feel sad and then moved on….its all you can do unfortunately.

Original poster
Curiousminds123 · 30/08/2024 20:21

For everyone asking me why I haven’t gone round, they have form for doing this yes, but only after conflict. We were fine. I have been blocked for sure, I don’t want to seem like I’m stalking or mad going to bang on their door. I’ve been trying to put it off my mind and not do that to give them space

OP posts:
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