Shrieking child next door ALL DAY LONG! WWYD

is working from home illegal? No is the answer. Is making disturbing loud noise 24/7 illegal - the answer is yes

A lot of people are fixating on the WFH thing. I WFH and I agree that it doesn't entitle you to demand that neighbours don't make normal family noise - the point is this doesn't seem to BE normal family noise. And it's very unlikely that OP is the only one affected!

Would all of you defending the child's right to shriek continuously with no attempt at parental intervention feel the same if the OP was recently postpartum and she and her newborn were being woken constantly? Or was terminally ill and unable to rest? Or very elderly and vulnerable? Would you still say they just need to move or get ear defenders??

Where would people have us families with noisy ND children live, so that we don’t affect others? Maybe we could start a colony and all live there together, like the lepers did.

its called "quiet enjoyment" and yes in the Uk it is a right. The way to enforce it is through the council noise nuisance facility. It doesn't mean that there can never be any noise but "excessive disturbance" can certainly be addressed.

Home is a place to work? (Sleep rest etc) Why should she move out rather than a child behave? Noise is a nuisance. It's not normal noise. It's beyond this

Well done for stalking my posts and therefore believing you've discoverered my entire work history and know all my qualifications and work experience. Gold medal.

I agree about reasoning. That comes later. Best to keep things simpler at that age. As a parent though, you're an adult, and can definitely show consideration for your neighbours.

I have neighbours like this. Only mum though. Dad arrives home and sound levels reduce to normal happy noise. Mum ....yelling as she's incapable of moving to be near to anyone ....she just yells top volume....music full blast, swearing loudly...very short fuse with kids.

It's noise that is not necessary and is impacting her neighbours. I can't see why anyone thinks making loud noise trumps their neighbour's need to work at home, sleep, think etc.

This. Find a place to work.

I have. The fact you think nd children can be somehow taught to behave is really misinformed. If you work in mainstream with more academic children you have very little experience about this.

This thread just shows how far society still has to go in terms of accepting people with unseen disabilities. If my child was physically disabled I wouldn’t have anyone telling me I was ‘jumping on a bandwagon’, that’s for sure. But that doesn’t mean my child’s disability doesn’t cause him (and us) untold difficulties, that I would give anything for him to not have to face.
We do our very best to not allow my child’s disability to affect other people, but he deserves a life too, and we’re not going to lock him away in case his noise affects someone.

I thought this about our neighbour’s kids.. but no.. got worse and worse as they got older and developed horrible, spoilt attitudes! We’ve moved now but one of them
was always crying, screaming outside but the parents would ignore them and just let the entire street hear their tantrum. I WFH and Covid was an absolute nightmare daily!!

Kids that age don't have much self control. You are talking about an age where many can't notice when they need the loo, let alone monitor their own loudness.

If they sometimes scream as a 'behaviour' you can teach them that we dont do that, but if they are naturally loud (like my DC who is also a bit deaf) you may not be able to change it.
If you have a loud one you can tell them to stop but they may just go back to loud mode next time they open their mouth. It's like old people who are deaf and yell at you, often they can't manage to tone it down- nor can a toddler

I'm sorry it would drive me mad too but there is probably not much to be done. It is a home and not an office after all.

YANBU. I live in a block of flats and have it with my NDN who moved in recently. They have a child who visits every day and shrieks constantly. Her parents let her stand in the hall blowing into a recorder. When it’s time to go she often has a tantrum right outside my front door which will go on for half an hour or more which, apart from being unbearable to listen to, is really awkward when I need to leave my flat. Sometimes the parent also obstructs my door with a pushchair and children’s shoes. It’s horrible.

Teaching two and three year olds is a process, and I agree you can teach them basic manners but it isn’t going to happen overnight and it’s harmful in the extreme to be constantly correcting and (for want of a better word) badgering children. ‘Be quiet, keep your voice down, don’t shriek, don’t scream, shush, hush, be more quiet, look, you’re disturbing the neighbours ...’ Not only is that unlikely to be effective it’s actually harmful, and is likely to result in children being either surly and defiant or miserable and cowed depending on their character (my ds would be the former, my dd the latter.)

It isn’t really possible to reason with a two year old. Early years trained or not (and you did work in a primary school and two year olds aren’t routinely at primary school; plus you’re now an 11 plus tutor) ‘discipline’ at this age is mostly distraction and removal from dangerous situations. I’m not adverse to a firm ‘no’ but the problem with something like screaming is it can quickly turn it into a bit of a power game and is often best ignored.

And yes, my NT children absolutely could be taught consideration for others at that age (and were), but my 6 year old ND child doesn’t have anywhere near that level of understanding yet.

Just because the child doesn’t have a diagnosis of additional needs, it doesn’t mean he doesn’t have them. That’s actually the hardest part, when you know your child is ND but you don’t yet have a diagnosis, and therefore everyone just assumes it’s down to bad behaviour and poor parenting. We barely left the house at that stage as the judgement from others was just too much to handle (although from reading these threads it’s clear that you’re being judged regardless, even when in your own home). My child was diagnosed at 3, by the way.
And yes, these threads (and MN as a whole) does attract more parents of ND kids. That’s because there is very little support in real life, so people look to online forums for that support (and still get judged, and told they’re jumping on a bandwagon).
Now I’m not saying the child has additional needs, I have no idea. I’m just saying that a lack of diagnosis doesn’t mean a lack of needs.

I was going to say that the child wouldn't know it was being taught consideration, but when I thought about it I changed me mind. A two year old would certainly feel puffed up if they were praised for not waking their baby sibling.

Yeah, knowing they haven't disturbed Mrs Jones is unlikely, but we teach our kids in steps, and you start early.

I'm early years trained actually.

Absolutely you can teach 2 and 3 year olds basic manners. It's part of parenting and it's backed up at school.

We have this with a kid over the back. He’s about 7 and I’ve been told he has ADHD. When he’s home he spends all day charging around the garden yelling. His parents positioned a trampoline as far from their house as possible - which is as close to ours as it could be. On occasion I’ve looked out the window to check no one is being murdered to see him doing things like throwing a football at close range directly into his younger brother’s face. Unsupervised of course. Whatever needs he has, he’s a little shit and his parents are big shits. I’ve heard they’re moving and couldn’t be happier.

We’ve had screaming neighbours for 10 years. Lucky not immediate neighbours.
The 2 children used to spend all day screeching and shouting at each other in the garden.
It’s greatly reduced since they are now teenagers, now it’s only if they have a friend round. However I spoke to one of their neighbours and apparently it hadn’t stopped it’s just indoors now and sometimes will start early in the morning and go on into the evenings, they also slam doors constantly.
The neighbour changed her rooms around to get away from it and stays over at her daughters (who had 4 children) for some ‘peace’.

The dad is also incredibly loud. I think some people have zero thought for others and he seems to like the sound of his own voice/being heard. The neighbour told me the mum is always trying to get others to take her children, or go out to get away from them. Rather than tackling it.

A two year old can be distracted / forced / cajoled / intimidated / removed from or away from a situation.

But there is no way a two year old can be taught that Mrs Jones is enjoying sitting in her garden and your noise is stopping her from doing that.

My DS is now 3 years nine months and he can be reasoned with sometimes but not a year ago.

Please read my post.... all of it. You clearly haven't.

I’m sorry, but I’m just going to say it. People who let their children do this are completely selfish arseholes and shit parents. YANBU.

Yes you can. A two year old can learn not to run up and down the stairs, they can learn to be quiet if their newborn sibling is asleep, they can use their 'inside voice' when they're visiting the grandparent in the nursing home, they can be aware of other people around them in a cafe and sit still for a period of time.

I don't have a solution OP. You'll be told on here that you have to put up with it but I'm not sure why people don't think that you should be able to enjoy your home and garden. If it was someone playing crap music loudly you'd be getting a different response. We lived next door to a child with autism during lockdown. They were in the garden screaming from dawn until dusk. Yes it's hard for the parents but it's also shit for the neighbours. We couldn't have the windows open due to all the rooms that could be used as an office facing the garden. We just stopped using the garden all together.