Would you have children if you knew they may never move out?

I've said this before on here but I don't understand the angst about renting. I'm in London and both my DCs (mid 20s) rent. It's done them the world of good to move out and manage their own lives. A lot of other countries rent all their lives, there isn't the pressure to buy. Mine will buy eventually but this is a step towards that.

No need for an ND 30 year old to be living at home, if they're working. I wouldn't want that for my kids, even though we get along really well and go on holiday together, out for meals etc. We all need our own space.

In a London house and with all of us WFH, it's difficult. I don't take any rent though.

In my menopause, I really do want some space of my own and I can't imagine living with my MIL, as many of my friends do because: culture!

I have no problem at all living with my adult children. I've done so at various points and with their partners and DC in tow too, and would cheerfully do so again. It was fun, companionable and very cost effective. That said, outside of the SE and other expensive areas, there's no need to think it will become an obligatory thing. Where I live housing is affordable on average wages. I'm also not sure why you are linking muti generational living with financially supporting your adult DC? Allowing them to live at home saves them housing costs, but they can pay their way so youre not out of pocket. In fact if everyone is chipping in, you're better off.

Most of the adults I know don't live with their parents.
I think it's reasonable to assume that you would have children who would leave home and make their own way at some point. I really hope that my kids will be able to do that sometime soon.

I think if I was told that they would be living with me forever, I would still have had them, but would be deeply regretting that now that they are teens.

Until you have adult children living at home: you will NEVER understand how stressful this is!

I moved in and out of my parents house many times between 18 and 30. I'm quite prepared for DS to do the same. As long as he helps out around the house and pays his way.

No I wouldn't, I wouldn't say I'm in a hurry for them to leave and to be honest when they become adults and can drive/have a car then they'll be pretty self sufficient anyway.

I'd draw the line at them living here with partners though and wouldn't want to even imagine having grandchildren here permanently.

Depends on the kids as people. We have one and hope she lives with us forever!

I'm only half joking. We are saving so that when she settles down and starts looking for a place to buy and start a family, we can move very close by and be on hand for loads of childcare. I know not everyone can afford to or wants to do that, and planning that is very different to managing a late 20s child that can't work or doesn't realistically stand any chance of starting their own life.

In theory I am happy for my children to stay forever.

In practice, our house, which was fine when they were younger, is getting too small for 4 adults, 2 of whom work at home.

So I think the multi-generational living is only practical if you have a big enough house :)

You are responsible for bringing them into existence. So yes. Of course.

That doesn't mean they don't have to do their part, contribute, etc. And the truth is that most young people do want to move out and be independent anyway.

But of course you should be happy to live with someone who you literally put on this planet.

I do have a kid that will never move out due to his disabilities.

I wouldn't have kids at all no.

It’s not what I want but I’d still prefer that to never having kids.

Yes definitely. I like bed having my children at home and missed them when they moved out.
In some cultures it's the norm for different generations to live together.

Yes I would. DD has mild SEN so is likely to be here for a fair bit anyway. Yes of course part of me longs for her to be independent and fly the nest but I love her and love having her here.

For ever?😨

If you are going to bring a whole new person into the world, you should at least be willing to live in their company.

I have one who is unlikely to ever live independently. He's 14 now and although I am worried what happens after his dad and I die I love the idea of always having him with us. He's such terrific company and along with his younger brother there are no other people I want to spend time with as much as I do him and DH and DS2.

I like the idea of multi generational living though. We briefly had my FIl stay with us for around 6 months before he passed due to his illnesses and needs and I loved it. Just having us all under the same roof.

Interested to hear from parents in London or the SE.

... for a deposit on their own places

I'd hate for my kids to be paying £1k+ per month in rent in a shared house when they could live at home and save most of that

I do think it is unusual because I see many posts here by women complaining ( quite rightly) that eldercare is very difficult. If it wasn't, nobody would ever have to go into a home.

I assume my youngest won't move out.

Or at least not until 30/in a LTR.

I won't do laundry for an over 18 though.

Yes, but I didn't really think much past them being babies and primary schoolers. Oops!

Yes, because my child was a contraception failure. She was going to turn up whether we liked it or not. I think thats the case for a good 50% of kids (first kids at least!)

I would simply ensure a bigger home, multigenerational living was common in my grandmothers time. More land so each child could have their own 1/4 acre.
Somewhere along the way we would have figured something out.
My 3 all own homes, and are planning on helping their children.