Dinner times at grandparents'

I wonder why ppl are so hung up on eating times. If my kids are hungry I'll feed them, we still all sit together and talk about the day. If dh or I are not hungry then, we'll eat later.

I don't expect anyone to change their routine because of us.
Surely there's a workaround.

We're abnormal, we eat anywhere between 8-10pm. Just whenever it's ready.

We're a weird family: DC eat around 6-7 pm, me afterwards, DH 9 pm..

Under 8yrs of age mine were in bed by 7, so to keep them up to eat at 8pm I'd have been fuming!

Many people in Europe. Not abnormal at all.

If a compromise can't be reached, perhaps have the main meal at lunchtime and everyone has a lighter dinner at the time they want.

Yes I would, as my kids at that age would probably have dinner at 5ishand be in bed at 7pm. For me personally that is too late for young kids to eat. But everyone lives their lives to suit their needs.

Not for my kids. Always hungry as soon as they got home from school and I’d start cooking at 4pm/4.10pm so they were eating by 5pm.

Now they are 17 & 18 they eat any time up to 9pm but if I offer dinner at 5pm they’d say say yes. They’d snack up until 9pm aswell

I think I'd be making tea for my kids at 5:00pm and eating with the adults at 9pm

Miss Marple 87. Totally agree 👍

Tammy Jones, spot on 👌

I don’t think it is for children aged 5 and under when you would presume bed time would be around 7! Breakfast around 7, lunch around 12, dinner at 5. We always ate dinner at 5, we came out of school starving like most kids. Eating at 5 means you can digest your food before bedtime - I think it’s selfish to young children to wait until parents are ready! Plus, kids will then snack before dinner as they are so hungry adding more calories to their daily intake, which would in turn cause weight gain!

Grandchildren eat at 5, adults sit with them and have a cup of tea and some olives or dip as a snack so the children are still sitting at the table and socialising, parent then does bath and bed and quick tidy, and then adults all have a relaxing evening meal at 8.

If my kids wouldn’t be getting dinner at their usual time ie 5pm - then they would not stay there, end of. What time are they expecting the children to go to bed if they won’t give them a meal?! And no, not a sandwich for dinner every night, maybe once or twice.

For me the adults can wait and eat later (with snack) as their bedtime is later. GPs either had weird routines for their kids or have forgotten.

Children can be served dinner earlier, but adults would be rude to insist on an earlier dinner time than what their hosts have decided on - that would be pretty rude IMO. Obviously you can have a sneaky snack when feeding the children ;)

Maybe you could offer to cook for kids at 5 pm and grandparent cooks adult meals only?

As a parent I would say something along the lines of what time are you planning on eating tonight. If they say after 7 I would say do you mind if I/we make something for the kids and myself earlier as thats too late for us? As TBF I wouldn’t want to be eating my main meal after 7 either and would prefer to eat no later than 6.30pm. So I would be eating with the kids too and your DH can do what he likes.

MIL used to always like going out for a meal on a weekend at 8.30pm or after when staying with them and expected us to take the kids along. At that time they were very little younger than yours OP and she expected them to be happy when tired and very hungry while she faffed around taking ages to choose and always insisted on three courses plus coffee. We solved that by excusing ourselves and feeding the DC at hers and saying we would just rather stay in with a takeaway pizza. Eventually she started saying when is the latest ‘rather’ would go out for a meal and we would say 6.30/7.

This entire thread exemplifies why, if we have guests, I always make sure some water, biscuits and nibbles are available in their room at all times. Different folks eat at different times.

Whenever I visit parents or in laws, I myself make dinner for the children who eat earlier, at the time which is convenient for them.
Parents & in laws will then cook dinner for themselves and whichever other adults choose to join them at their usually dinner time (8 or 9 ish).

I think it’s unreasonable to expect anyone to cook dinner for you or your children at a different time than what they are used to. Especially an older family member who is already hosting you.

It is reasonable for them to give you access to the kitchen so that you have the means to meet your children’s needs.

Ours also is great at restaurants, we’ve been taking them since they were babies and always eat out at least once on a weekend. Never had a problem with them and it’s easier now they can talk and have a conversation.

We don’t eat together during the week though, they eat with their peers at nursery, then have a snack about 1830 when they get home. My husband and I eat at 2100.

Do I don’t think it’s necessary that for your children to behave you have to all eat together all the time. I certainly didn’t with my parents during the week. We all love going out to eat and family dinners play a huge part of our socialisation, especially on holiday. But, that’s not because we all ate at 1800 every night, pretty much the opposite!

This

Grandchildren eat at five, bath and bed then adults relax.

Won't that depend on what time you go to bed though?

Keep the children on their schedule. You can always wait and eat later if you don't want to eat at 5.

I'd give them tea and share a drink with them and maybe some light food. Then I'd have a supper after they went to bed.