AIBU to be annoyed by people who think literally

No one said it made her autistic. They pointed out taking things literally and misunderstanding phrases can be a trait of ASD.

They already have!
I knew it wouldn’t take long.
Only on Mumsnet.
Nowhere else seems so transfixed by suggesting Autism spectrum for every little trait these days.

Maybe the woman just hadn’t heard of cellar spiders.
It doesn’t make her autistic.

I’ve not heard of them, either.

A cellar spider is the one with the long thin spindly legs and little body, they look a bit like a cranefly without the wings.

OP didn’t invent the name/term.

I don’t think this is a case of nd, more that your friend is a little dim.

I don't understand why people are saying the OP spoke in riddles and didn't say what she meant?!

"once I got rid of the cellar spiders that have taken over"

It's one extra word that's actually irrelevant - it's perfectly clear what the OP means.

YANBU it's tiresome having to explain things to people who take everything literally - in what world would spiders actually have taken over

Do you like your friend?

I thought that was Crane Flies?

Daddy Long Legs come up when you google Cellar Spiders and vice versa.

Daddy long legs fly. Cellar spiders are the long skinny legged ones.

Oh! It's a Daddy Long Legs! Everyday is a school day.

I had to Google them, I've never heard them being called cellar spiders before. I think YABU.

I also think the difference between what people say and what people mean really funny. Misunderstandings like the one you had are the spice of life.

Maybe she's autistic. Perhaps you should have more empathy for people who don't see everything your way. Particularly a friend

I wouldn't be taken aback by someone not knowing that cellar spiders live anywhere they damn well fancy and are not just restricted to cellars. I don't expect the whole world to be a spider nerd or to have noticed there's a difference in spiders they see, to know that cave spiders might live under manhole covers and in canal tunnels, that woodlouse spiders will eat things other than woodlice.. etc etc.

But people taking things literally in order to be a bit of a dick, yes that is annoying. I just don't yours is an example of that.

These two are complete fuckers.

When my grandma says them to me, they are exactly what she means. When my colleagues say them, they are polite brush offs (?! I think? Maybe?). When it's parents from my kid's school, they are social niceties alone and insincere. When my neighbour says them it could be any or all.

How the living fuck are you meant to know what people mean?

Hi 5!

Me too.

OP...I can't stand it when NT people imply things and expect us to be psychic when they don't have the communication skills to say what they actually mean, so I feel your pain. It's really bloody annoying.

Have also literally never heard of a "Cellar" Spider until this thread.

They are called cellar spiders. That is the common name. I can assure you, calling then Pholcus phalangiodes is far more baffling for most people.

Also never heard of cellar spiders!

My DD is autistic and I never know when she is going to take something literally or fail to understand so I have to either being clear in the first place or patient when taking the extra time to explain.

I think I am also probably autistic. I have however mostly learnt over time that things should not always be taken literally.

It does catch me out sometimes though; we were out at the weekend and someone asked me for a "couple of wipes" as the child with them had chocolate ice-cream all over their face. Instinctively, I was in the process of very carefully trying to extract exactly two wipes when I realised that a) they had probably just said a couple for ease of phrase, b) they probably did need more and c) it didn't actually matter if I gave them four or five.

My FIL is exactly the same! I was in a museum and there was an old painting of a little boy in a funny costume that had a passing resemblance to DH as a child, so I sent it to the family WhatsApp with something along the lines of “I didn’t know DHs portrait was in here” and he replied that’s not DH, do you think it looks like him? 🙄

My husband always says 'stop taking things so literally' to me. Eg he'll say 'I'll be ready in 5 minutes', 20 minutes later he's not ready, im annoyed, and I'm being too literal. Just tell me it will 20 minutes.

Recently ex ASD

But OP didn't invent it! That's her point! Clearly we are losing the ability to interpret subtleties of language and I notice it a lot on here that people take things at face value. A lot of once common and understood terms are now being lost as people don't use them or have conversations anymore.

🙄

I am a very literal thinker. It takes my brain extra time to work out what people actually mean which is absolutely exhausting and means I often reply literally/inappropriately. I then feel ashamed/self loathing for being socially inadequate. These feelings would be compounded if I thought my literal thinking annoyed others because I literally cannot help it. My daughter is the same.

I don't have any diagnosed neurodiversity (except dyslexia) but it just seems to be the way I'm wired, and not something I can help so I think YABU.

Idioms and phrases don’t feel like riddles to some of us because the meaning seems so obvious. It took me having a ND DC to realise how literal thinking some brains are. It wasn’t obvious to me before that. It’s like some brains focus on actual words and other brains focus on context. This just leads to misunderstandings and even frustration.

Dd1 is like this and drives her sister insane. We just explain things in different words. It could well be a ND thing unless you feel she's deliberately misunderstanding you to be annoying?

I have no clue what a 'cellar spider' is either, fwiw

I've never heard the term cellar spider. Is that a specific type?

I have never heard of cellar spiders, possibly a regional thing.

The literal thing would annoy me. Happily most of my friends like a good idiom

I have a ND family and there are many of us like this. I have had to politely explain many times at work that I cannot always understand when I should or should not do a variety of tasks that are officially always, but actually sometimes, done, just by inference. Or indeed to 'read between the lines'. I only can with things I have said or written myself. I think literally: if I am told something, then that is what will happen/I will think. I work in a school; I view it as a good reminder to other staff to explain clearly for the benefit of our ND and EAL students. They can't shout when I don't work it out right...

I may not have asked why they weren't in the cellar (if I was aware there was no cellar), but not having previously heard of cellar spiders, I'd definitely have asked in puzzlement why they were in your garage.