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Was I being unkind? Women filming themselves in their pants

335 replies

LivingInStrangeTimes · 27/08/2024 20:16

I was scrolling through tiktok and came across a video of a woman showing a jumpsuit outfit which she is reccomending people buy.

The strange part to me is that the video begins with her standing there in tiny knickers and a bra then she gets dressed into the jumpsuit.

I perhaps shouldn't have said anything at all but left the following comment

"You look lovely. I'm not being unkind but why has it become so normalised to upload videos of ourselves in our underwear? You don't have to expose yourself like that to show the garment x"

Cue a pile on and her getting pissed off because apparently I'm only saying it because of her body type - which had absolutely nothing to do with it for me. We actually look quite similar in the buff!

I'm seeing more and more of these videos and it has become the new normal and done thing on social media for people who want to show clothes, to stand their in their pants beforehand and have you watch them get dressed.

Was I being unreasonable to say what I said and am I unreasonable for thinking its fucking weird and unnecessary?

"I want to show you this dress, but first here's my knickers!"

Edited to add - I mention women specifically because I'm not seeing any of these videos from men.. and nor do I want to 😐

OP posts:
Garlicfest · 27/08/2024 20:33

LivingInStrangeTimes · 27/08/2024 20:31

Those things aren't remotely comparable.

Really? How? Could you please enumerate the reasons why a woman shouldn't be seen in her undies while putting more clothes on, but it's okay if she stays in her bra and pants?
Thanks.

Fromage · 27/08/2024 20:32

To be clear....

Woman posts what she wants on TikTok.
You post 'YABU for showing us your body in your vest and pants'
Others post 'YABU for saying that'

You are upset others have posted their opinion on what you chose to post on TikTok.

That it?

yesmen · 27/08/2024 20:32

Putting · 27/08/2024 20:27

There are kids on the app. Should 13yo boys be watching 35-40yo women getting dressed?

No, their parents should be putting controls on / checking what they’re watching

That answer is INFURIATING.

All parents try.

All social media companies spend hundreds of millions making sure they fail.

We need to take back the streets - in our modern world the streets include social media.

No e if it is stacked to help create a good society.

Pantaloons99 · 27/08/2024 20:32

@Pipecleanerrevival 🤣 love that.

I've been going on tiktok lately. It's blown my mind. I have a son with a mobile phone. I need to research. I nearly lost my mind seeing videos that trend on Snapchat. I'm sick of it myself.

I agree with you OP. But no I e is hearing you. It's gone too far. Even older women/ mum's in their later years want the attention. And yes I agree this video isn't to be compared to walking down the beach in a bikini.

HornyHornersPinkyWinky · 27/08/2024 20:32

yesmen · 27/08/2024 20:28

Why is “it’s none of your business” such a standard answer ?

The TikTok poster uploads video of her herself in her bra and knickers. It is the equivalent of walking through town in your bra and knickers.

As such, it is our business.

if I click to see a jump suit I have not agreed to look at underwear.

I know, it's such a ridiculous response.
Someone posting on a public forum is doing it purely to make sure others see it. That's basically the point. Those people are going to have an opinion either way. If they want things to be 'none of your business' then don't bother posting publicly FFS.

Putting · 27/08/2024 20:31

LivingInStrangeTimes · 27/08/2024 20:30

This content isn't age restricted. It's on the FYP.

Then don’t let your kids on TikTok if you’re bothered 🤷‍♀️

LivingInStrangeTimes · 27/08/2024 20:31

Garlicfest · 27/08/2024 20:28

For god's sake don't look at any Dove skincare ads. Or the lingerie sections of any clothing retailers. Or the beachwear sections. Or people on beaches, or at swimming pools. In fact, it might be best if you don't look at any media that might contain images of humans. Limit yourself to looking at people outdoors in a cool climate, you'll feel much happier.

Those things aren't remotely comparable.

OP posts:
LivingInStrangeTimes · 27/08/2024 20:30

Putting · 27/08/2024 20:27

There are kids on the app. Should 13yo boys be watching 35-40yo women getting dressed?

No, their parents should be putting controls on / checking what they’re watching

This content isn't age restricted. It's on the FYP.

OP posts:
Pipecleanerrevival · 27/08/2024 20:29

Yabu for being on tiktok in the first place.

Melodysmum12 · 27/08/2024 20:29

Yeah I agree with you. It’s attention seeking that’s all and it makes me cringe!

yesmen · 27/08/2024 20:28

Winrus · 27/08/2024 20:20

Yabu because it’s none of your business what she does. It doesn’t really take a genuine to figure out why she’s doing this does it? Just move on if you don’t like it.

Why is “it’s none of your business” such a standard answer ?

The TikTok poster uploads video of her herself in her bra and knickers. It is the equivalent of walking through town in your bra and knickers.

As such, it is our business.

if I click to see a jump suit I have not agreed to look at underwear.

Dotto · 27/08/2024 20:28

They do it in their bra & pants deliberately to get more followers and make more money

HornyHornersPinkyWinky · 27/08/2024 20:28

I agree OP it's a bit much, but surely you realise that most young women on the internet these days get their kit off. It's basically a surefire way of getting attention.

Garlicfest · 27/08/2024 20:28

For god's sake don't look at any Dove skincare ads. Or the lingerie sections of any clothing retailers. Or the beachwear sections. Or people on beaches, or at swimming pools. In fact, it might be best if you don't look at any media that might contain images of humans. Limit yourself to looking at people outdoors in a cool climate, you'll feel much happier.

Fromage · 27/08/2024 20:28

I think showing normal bodies (assuming she isn't a swimwear model) is a good thing. Makes those of us who aren't a perfect 10 feel a little less hideous, maybe?

There is also the option of blocking those whose content we dislike. No need for micro criticisms, unless our opinion is asked for.

Putting · 27/08/2024 20:27

There are kids on the app. Should 13yo boys be watching 35-40yo women getting dressed?

No, their parents should be putting controls on / checking what they’re watching

Irridescantshimmmer · 27/08/2024 20:27

Your comment was spot on and you have EVERY right to express your opinion.

I would have found that nauseating to be honest, and inappropriate.

Yozzer87 · 27/08/2024 20:26

I don't see the point in you posting that. It's not going to make her stop doing it and it's not like she's the only one. I've seen much more over the top stuff on these kind of videos. If you don't like it just scroll past.

LivingInStrangeTimes · 27/08/2024 20:26

Celticliving · 27/08/2024 20:18

I think your comment was unnecessary at best. Why do you have an issue with a woman's body? It's not like she was naked.

I don't have an issue with the woman's body. I just don't think it's necessary for me or anybody else to see her in her underwear.

There are kids on the app. Should 13yo boys be watching 35-40yo women getting dressed?

I have a daughter and I'd be upset If she posted something like that.

I don't think it should be normalised. What next?

There's a reason changing rooms are enclosed.

There are many reasons for me and none of them are to do with her personally.

OP posts:
Pigeonqueen · 27/08/2024 20:25

You don’t need to comment if it’s something you don’t like. You can just scroll past (yes, the irony of my own comment isn’t lost on me here).

TheNewSchmoo · 27/08/2024 20:24

If you start a comment with "Imnot being unkind but...", you know you are being unkind.

lazyarse123 · 27/08/2024 20:24

Yanbu. If we don't want judging on our bodies why keep displaying them?
I know women can wear what they like blah blah blah but it's so unnecessary.

Everyoneesleistheproblem · 27/08/2024 20:23

I think it's helpful. You can see where the fat actually is and how well each item flatters.
I am always surprised how big bellies are on women that don't seem fat at all in clothes. I thought it was just me!

WeeOrcadian · 27/08/2024 20:23

If only there was a way you could scroll on past......

BippityBopper · 27/08/2024 20:22

Winrus · 27/08/2024 20:20

Yabu because it’s none of your business what she does. It doesn’t really take a genuine to figure out why she’s doing this does it? Just move on if you don’t like it.

When you post things on the internet it's everyone's business.