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AIBU?

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Mums of sons. (Hard hat on for this)

637 replies

Daniagainagainagainagain · 26/08/2024 12:36

Apologies for the grabby title. I've NC'd for this as I have a few running threads currently with very outing and personal details on.

Anyway back to the point.
I see SO many threads on here where the topic about the thread is about a guy. It's not even necessarily bad about the bloke in question, but so many many posters just seem to hate men. Not give them the benefit of the doubt. Tear them a new arsehole for merely posting on MN asking for advice. There was a thread recently about a woman seeing a really nice guy, a gentlemen as she described him where he had been separated for literally YEARS but wasn't divorced. Turns out there were cultural differences meaning divorce in that country is very rare. People kept saying 'throw him back in the sea' 'he's a liar' one poster called him a wanker.. there was no evidence that he was a wanker and the OP seemed happy with the guy. Just more people clutching for their moment to berate men. It's always the guys fault on here no matter what.

It's always the same posters more often than not berating men, shooting them down, and just hating them. I wonder, do these women posters have sons? If so, do you think your sons are exempt from such awful insults because 'my boy would never'? I can't imagine these posters talking about their sons like that. So do you pick and choose, is it one rule for your sons and one for all other men?

Before it labelled being 'cool' I have just got out of a 10 year abusive relationship where ex cheated multiple times to the point of police involvement. I am not naive to think some of these guys deserve what they get.

AIBU? To think there's huge double standards? To call strangers with no reason to, wankers, but to also think the son shines out of your son's arses?

I know I'll probably ruffle some feathers but I'd genuinely like to know. And yes I have DC.

OP posts:
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ImSoExited · 27/08/2024 12:31

Op you clearly have special powers or you work for MN, I would suggest you continue the discussion entirely on your own as it appears you're fully capable of that.

Do let us know though if you get in a tangle with yourself and end up 'creaming your pants' in the process.
(Yuk, I can't even write that)

Daniagainagainagainagain · 27/08/2024 12:30

@BernardBlacksBreakfastWine no, I'm not posting from different accounts.

See for yourself.

Mums of sons. (Hard hat on for this)
Mums of sons. (Hard hat on for this)
OP posts:
DickEmery · 27/08/2024 12:30

How does it let you do that? I can't change names within a thread.

Daniagainagainagainagain · 27/08/2024 12:30

@angeldelite it's actually not allowed..

But you can access many threads and see for yourself.
Someone has actually nominated themself on this thread. HTH.

OP posts:
angeldelite · 27/08/2024 12:28

Daniagainagainagainagain · 27/08/2024 12:24

Nope, very much female last time I checked!

Now if we could go back to the actual point of the thread that would be good, as there's some good points on both sides and it's getting lost with silly posts like this.

I thought your point was ‘It's always the same posters more often than not berating men, shooting them down, and just hating them.’

And yet you can’t name a single one.

Daniagainagainagainagain · 27/08/2024 12:28

This reply has been deleted

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BernardBlacksBreakfastWine · 27/08/2024 12:28

Daniagainagainagainagain · 27/08/2024 11:56

That's really informative and a really good POV to the discussion.

The statistics for violence against women and girls is absolutely awful and it needs more traction for sure.

The statistics for violence against women and girls is absolutely awful and it needs more traction for sure.

If you believe this, why start a thread designed to obfuscate the horror perpetuated by the class of men?

BernardBlacksBreakfastWine · 27/08/2024 12:25

obluuuuu · 27/08/2024 12:23

THIS IS BE POSTING FROM A DIFFERENT USERNAME FROM THE SAME ACCOUNT.

I'll go back to my other username after this comment. Just doing it to prove a point.

Now go away :)

Nope. You’re posting from a different account.

Mums of sons. (Hard hat on for this)
DickEmery · 27/08/2024 12:25

Blimey

Daniagainagainagainagain · 27/08/2024 12:24

angeldelite · 27/08/2024 12:13

OP sounds like a man. Quelle surprise.

Nope, very much female last time I checked!

Now if we could go back to the actual point of the thread that would be good, as there's some good points on both sides and it's getting lost with silly posts like this.

OP posts:
obluuuuu · 27/08/2024 12:23

BernardBlacksBreakfastWine · 27/08/2024 12:16

Deleted again @Daniagainagainagainagain Such a shame after you put so much effort into a long passive-aggressive (nonsense) explanation about how you forgot to change your username back!

It’s not that anyone is super-invested (at least not to the extent of, oh I don’t know - making a sock-puppet account to chat to themselves…); it’s just that what you’re saying is a direct lie and yet you think you’re styling it out. This has already been explained to you: it’s impossible to post under different names on the same thread. You are doing it from different accounts. Not accidental. And quite sad.

THIS IS BE POSTING FROM A DIFFERENT USERNAME FROM THE SAME ACCOUNT.

I'll go back to my other username after this comment. Just doing it to prove a point.

Now go away :)

Daniagainagainagainagain · 27/08/2024 12:22

BernardBlacksBreakfastWine · 27/08/2024 12:16

Deleted again @Daniagainagainagainagain Such a shame after you put so much effort into a long passive-aggressive (nonsense) explanation about how you forgot to change your username back!

It’s not that anyone is super-invested (at least not to the extent of, oh I don’t know - making a sock-puppet account to chat to themselves…); it’s just that what you’re saying is a direct lie and yet you think you’re styling it out. This has already been explained to you: it’s impossible to post under different names on the same thread. You are doing it from different accounts. Not accidental. And quite sad.

Well, you are completely wrong. You can post under a different username from the same account. MN can clarify I only have one account. I will comment in a second with a different username to prove my point.

See, you're not so clever after all.

OP posts:
Tandora · 27/08/2024 12:18

YABU YABU YABU 🙄🙄

BernardBlacksBreakfastWine · 27/08/2024 12:16

Deleted again @Daniagainagainagainagain Such a shame after you put so much effort into a long passive-aggressive (nonsense) explanation about how you forgot to change your username back!

It’s not that anyone is super-invested (at least not to the extent of, oh I don’t know - making a sock-puppet account to chat to themselves…); it’s just that what you’re saying is a direct lie and yet you think you’re styling it out. This has already been explained to you: it’s impossible to post under different names on the same thread. You are doing it from different accounts. Not accidental. And quite sad.

angeldelite · 27/08/2024 12:13

OP sounds like a man. Quelle surprise.

LuminousCrystalFox · 27/08/2024 12:13

The fact that you and a few others are getting all horny over a 'gotcha' moment

how about you firstly, calm the fuck down

You're really not doing yourself any favours here. Your use of crude sexual language to try to shut me and others down, and the level of rage you’re displaying when called out speaks volumes about you. It’s a pretty common response to women who won’t shhhh.

If it walks like a duck, and talks like a duck…

Feel free to rage reply further but I’m done spending time on you.

Daniagainagainagainagain · 27/08/2024 11:56

TealSapphire · 27/08/2024 11:41

I have four sons. They get called out for bad behaviour - of course! I've taught them about respect and consent and hope with all my heart that they turn into decent men. I'm certainty not naively thinking they're perfect nor berating them simply for their sex.

OP mentioned male suicide. I'm not sure about UK stats but in Australia 19 in every 100,000 male deaths are recorded as suicide - you'd think that number is accurate as far as reporting goes.

One in every four women is subject to domestic abuse. Probably that figure is under reported, as so many women put up with abuse without reporting/pressing charges.

So, with that data, a man has a .00019% chance of dying by suicide.

A woman has a 25% chance of being the victim of domestic abuse.

It's a huge problem. Just look at the threads on here, the awful treatment women and children are subjected to. The financial abuse ones get me, men who hoard their money while their partner has to pay all of their (joint!) children's expenses. Now that is heartbreaking.

That's really informative and a really good POV to the discussion.

The statistics for violence against women and girls is absolutely awful and it needs more traction for sure.

OP posts:
TealSapphire · 27/08/2024 11:41

I have four sons. They get called out for bad behaviour - of course! I've taught them about respect and consent and hope with all my heart that they turn into decent men. I'm certainty not naively thinking they're perfect nor berating them simply for their sex.

OP mentioned male suicide. I'm not sure about UK stats but in Australia 19 in every 100,000 male deaths are recorded as suicide - you'd think that number is accurate as far as reporting goes.

One in every four women is subject to domestic abuse. Probably that figure is under reported, as so many women put up with abuse without reporting/pressing charges.

So, with that data, a man has a .00019% chance of dying by suicide.

A woman has a 25% chance of being the victim of domestic abuse.

It's a huge problem. Just look at the threads on here, the awful treatment women and children are subjected to. The financial abuse ones get me, men who hoard their money while their partner has to pay all of their (joint!) children's expenses. Now that is heartbreaking.

Daniagainagainagainagain · 27/08/2024 11:33

This reply has been deleted

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LuminousCrystalFox · 27/08/2024 10:56

You’re clearly using sock puppet accounts, that much has been proven already. A simple NC is not what you’ve been doing, as much as you may protest. Why? Because posting from different names to one thread is not possible otherwise.

As for it being a ‘common mistake’, I’m afraid you’re alone there. Using multiple accounts is against MN ToS for the very obvious reason that you can’t have a genuine conversation with someone who is using multiple fake accounts to respond to their own threads.

And lastly, a little tip for you. Women don’t go around discussing each other’s wetness. I know, shocking…

angeldelite · 27/08/2024 09:09

Daniagainagainagainagain · 26/08/2024 23:29

@LuminousCrystalFox I'm not new here? Why are you making things up? Odd.

I'm flicking between a couple of threads and I have personal outing information on my account so I regularly change my name.

As soon as I realised, I explained what happened. There's nothing else to it and the fact you're creaming your pants over a very probably common mistake, shows how much time you obviously have on your hands.

And yeah, I'll keep 'digging'. Many people on this thread agree with me. Many also don't but they're not piling on like you and your little mates below. Calm down a bit love, it's okay.

I have personal outing information on my account so I regularly change my name.

OP, still waiting for you to post the name of even one of ‘the same posters over and over again posting at how much they hate men.’

You just can’t do it, can you?

Gilbertwasawuss · 27/08/2024 09:04

SallyWD · 27/08/2024 08:56

Yes I agree but I was talking from a UK perspective.

Historically boys have been prized in the UK and girls regarded as a burden or useless also.

Times have changed a bit in recent years, but I think people are only noticing because it's a difference to what it used to be.

Most people don't even notice when someone says "I'm so glad I'm having a boy".

But I have heard plenty of people (in real life) curious or questioning when the reverse is said.
Not in a mean way, but just that they haven't considered someone would prefer a girl.

I absolutely acknowledge that maybe some parents treat boys poorly, but in my observations it is the exception not the rule.

I also guarantee more girls are sexually abused or treated as extensions of the mother in regards to housework and caring for the males in the family than boys are treated badly simply for being boys.

SallyWD · 27/08/2024 08:56

Gilbertwasawuss · 27/08/2024 08:52

Sure, but do you know any country in the world where male babies are killed at birth?

In far more cultures than not, boys are prized and yearned for and girls are decidedly not.

I mean, it was the same not too long ago in the UK amongst certain people.

We need to have a bit of perspective here.

Treating ANY child poorly due to their sex is terrible, but boys and men do not have it worse in any respect.

Yes I agree but I was talking from a UK perspective.

Gilbertwasawuss · 27/08/2024 08:52

SallyWD · 27/08/2024 05:32

The sad thing is a lot of mums (and some dads) like this do have sons and treat them poorly because they're boys. I've seen it so many times. Their hatred of men spills over onto their sons. Makes me sad.

Sure, but do you know any country in the world where male babies are killed at birth?

In far more cultures than not, boys are prized and yearned for and girls are decidedly not.

I mean, it was the same not too long ago in the UK amongst certain people.

We need to have a bit of perspective here.

Treating ANY child poorly due to their sex is terrible, but boys and men do not have it worse in any respect.

Daniagainagainagainagain · 27/08/2024 08:17

SallyWD · 27/08/2024 05:32

The sad thing is a lot of mums (and some dads) like this do have sons and treat them poorly because they're boys. I've seen it so many times. Their hatred of men spills over onto their sons. Makes me sad.

That's heartbreaking..

It goes hand in hand with all the sex disappointment threads on here as it's nearly always boys.

There's many threads on here too where GP leave out a GC and I've found it's nearly always boys too. Boys are great and I'd love to have one of my own one day.

OP posts: