How would you parent this situation?

Different ages of children - does that mean different parents through a divorce or just as it is? If it was her choice to go to a festival - a tad odd given her age to choose as surely would have had no knowledge of one before - then fair enough pack up and leave. A bit odd to take a two year old to same outing. If she is complaining of headaches at that age then I'd be wanting them investigated - you don't sound very concerned at all. I hope this little girl gets the love and attention she clearly needs from someone outside of this marriage.

Quick thought. Lots of people have said periods or overwhelmed and she has a headache. Yes, absolutely take her phone away if she’s on it but at some calmer point, maybe a gentle chat about exactly what the matter was, if she has the words to explain.

I wouldnt go home, but, id try talking to her and find out why she seems to dislike family holidays. Would she be the same if allowed to take a friend along as well? Kids that age dont always enjoy being with parents and nobody their own age, ask her, and if she says she wants a friend to go next time tell her she will have to do jobs at home to earn money to pay for her own entertainment next time, but if she wants you to consider it then she needs to join in and NOT spoil this holiday or you won't even consider a friend going next time and youll send her to stay with grandparents, auntie or whatever and go without her in future.

My daughter is 16 and does exactly this...none of the things I tried have worked, telling her off, being extra nice and comforting, removing screens, explaining consequences or packing and leaving. Whatever I do I end up feeling awful.
No solutions but loads of empathy, I've been there and it sucks.
If you can get her out in fresh air somehow.....it might help.

You could well be right, and majority of us female and gone through the first period/ pmt situation, easy to automatically think a girl is being difficult.
My advice would be to suggest to her that if she is using a screen, it might be that causing her headache , that might open up a talk and find out what maybe really bothering her.

My son and I were at Silverstone festival on Saturday evening to see Busted - did you see them? I hope you did some nice things while you were there x

Clearly this was your idea to go to a festival and maybe she thought it sounded fun at the time you suggested it? Kids are usually keen to be accommodating on the whole.

However, going to a Festival/camping would be my idea of pure hell so maybe she’s discovered that she really doesn’t enjoy it as much as you do?

Will you drag her along to other festivals in the future?

I would give the 10 year old a massive bollocking and gibe a choice of 2 things to do. Either or

If they refused either i would get a grandparent to pick them up....

@Himitsu .yupp-its really hard-they dont come with a manual and no 2 are the same.
its really easy to say you are the adult they are the child. all the "mine would never"clearly happy say that but never experienced it.or would tell you how to overcome with something other than a "stern look"
i love classic cars too.
will she return to them with dad n toddler get some "happy photos" then just keep kinda walkin talkin ?shes getting the attention shes requiring but you can maybe manipulate it into good attention?
took me...couple of yrs and severl shitshows to rework my then just past toddlers bility ro ruin aa day.onne of best things ...tho much younger ..so maybe easier..was make him designated photographer. or "group medic" maany big long walks we all came home with plasters from "staged falls" cos he actually quite a caring sweetheart and would happily look after his patient n stop thinking bout(whtever his i dont wanna head was doing)

Sounds like she’s in control. You need to take it back. Pack up and go home.

dont manhndle her.take the tent down.

OP I'm glad she enjoyed it in the end. Just to say my DD got her periods at just turned 11 and we had awful moody stroppy behaviour at your DDs age and I was fit to throttle her so it genuinely could be hormonal and your DD probably doesn't even know why she is behaving like it. I remember a birthday party where she initially refused to participate after wanting to attend and I actually had to walk away and take deep breaths.

This is perfect advice

Expecting a child to do what an adult says isn’t the reason for mental health issues. Too much choice, being treated like rational little adult in one breath but then like a child in the next leads to confusion, having no boundaries, projecting adult issues onto children at very young ages, unsupervised access to the internet. They are all reasons, in my opinion, why children have mental health issues. That is if they do, I also think adults are far too quick to label children with anxiety or other issues when worry is a normal part of life. We should be teaching children to be resilient and selfless (not spoiling the trip for others) rather than it all being about me me me. I will no doubt get flamed for this unpopular opinion but the replies on here have been mad.

Some of the replies on here show why we have such a mental health crisis in children. What a lot of unpleasant sounding control freakery.

Glad your daughter enjoyed the evening, OP.

It's not a democracy. My child wouldn't have a choice.

My DD would have sat in the tent for days without any ents. The removal of any home privileges wouldn't have moved her. She would have had to have been dragged kicking and screaming out of the tent, and then dragged to the festival.

Then she would have been dragged kicking and screaming. I have no patience with wet parents who seem to just accept that they have no control over their children. Wtf? Have some authority. Who exactly is in charge here? This is not a democracy! It's not open to negotiation. I am the parent and if I say we're going out, we're bloody going out.

It should never get to this point. You lay the foundations early at 3, 4, 5 years old. What mum says goes. Physical removal/reinforcement if necessary. By 10 refusing shouldn't even occur to them as an option.

“She sounds horrible”?

She’s a ten year old child!! 🙄

She may be a bit shy on her own, if other kids doing the activities are with siblings or friends. There was a 7 year age gap between me and my younger sibling. I remember from about 8 or 9 feeling quite self-conscious of being on my own, even if other kids were on their own. If they were kids I didn’t know I hadn’t really learned the art if striking up a conversation. It’s different at home as you get to know the kids.

If It is a festival about cars and that is her passion, it makes sense that she doesn’t like walking very much, does she walk much at home.

NRTFT but you take control. Offer two options, both of which you’re happy with. Offer a stick, offer a carrot (make it clear you’d rather not use the stick). Eg. ‘We can stay here for the next hour but then we’re going out to get food but you’ll have lost your phone/tablet/an hour of screen time etc or we can go out now and have a nice time. If you come out now maybe we can get a donut. I’d definitely prefer the second option. What about you?’ Batten down the hatches for the possibility of a strop. Stick to your guns. You can’t let a ten year old dictate a holiday. If you do, imagine what the teenage years will be like!! (From the mum of an extremely strong willed ten yo boy - honestly, I swear he’d wear down the most experienced of diplomats!)

*bear not best

I have a teen DD and older teen DS they are very much little girls whatever they may like to believe are they even pre-teens, I thought that was 11/12? Surely at least secondary school age is pre-teen, a ten year old is still at primary school!