AIBU for leaving my DP's dad's BBQ?

I was going to say that if you have contamination OCD and raw meat is your biggest fear you might be better off not going to BBQs full stop. Then I read your other posts.

Handling raw chicken and mince and wiping his hands on his jeans??? Then touching other things, including a toddler, with unwashed hands? That’s just disgusting.

I think the help that is needed is to send the dirty bloke on a Food Hygiene course.

• I was getting angry is a problem. How much therapy are you having for this?*

Getting angry and kicking off, then running off takes away from what should have been a rational discussion.
Do you refuse to attend things with your family/friends too or just his?

YABA and clearly have issues that the rest of us find hard to understand. Please be careful not to pass your fears on to your DD as it will make her life difficult especially as she gets older and goes out with friends. You won’t be there to protect her. You really need to develop strategies for dealing g with this and possibly seek help.

I think you really should have pointed it out, and said something. Or kindly taken a bowl of hot water to him to "wash the raw meat off his hands". Fine for you to up and leave, but not so fine it you want to maintain a relationship. Better to offend someone by asking them to wash their hands then just walking out of their party.

I suppose living in a relatively safe country turns people into careless pigs.

It's funny how many people haven't even understood the OP wasn't that worried about the meat - as it was normally cooked after he touched it , so his germs were less important.
Her concern was practically avout everything else he touched directly after touching the raw meat (which wasn't being cooked).

Putting it bluntly, would you be happy if he touched the child's face or hand him a dummy directly after touching the raw meat?

I’m not clear why you posted the question in the first place, because you don’t seem to want to hear opinions that don’t agree with you!

You cook salad?

Oh do you not wash your hands after touching raw chicken then? Because there are germs everywhere already so what difference does it make?

I bet the majority of people calling OP ridiculous would not handle raw chicken, and then just wipe their hands on their jeans and then carry on.

Fuck me. People's reading comprehension is dire. As are people's attitudes to mental illness.

Once the food is cooked there will be zero germs on it …. I’d have stayed and eaten the op’s share of the food too 🤣

I wonder how OP will react when she discovers there are microorganisms everywhere.

So I guess no one got ill. Weirdly original coke is supposed to best if you are worried (wild swimmers drink it if they are worried about the water quality). But yes, YWBABU - kids stuck all sorts of things in their mouths, get used to it (one of mine ate a garden snail) and you should really try not pass this fear on.

YANBU. Handling raw meat, wiping his hands on his trousers and continuing to touch everything is gross, unhygienic and a recipe for food poisoning. Eating the burger is totally not the point! The burger is fine once it's cooked it's the ongoing touching with potentially contaminated hands.
The OCD is a bit of a red herring - but having a contamination form does make you very vigilant to this kind of behaviour.
Ideally your DP should have a discreet word with his Dad about not risking his guests health.

The way you handled this was bad!
also, saying “I didn’t want to go anyways” is massively immature! You did go, and therefore that’s no excuse.

Yes, I thought this as well.

I would have been wary of eating the food after what has been described, and I don’t think I’m particularly fussy.

So many posts about OP's OCD !

It's not.

It's about basic hygiene, & the lack thereof.

I think I'd leave too. It is disgusting and I hate when people don't show good hygiene and them hosting ! It's ridiculous.

You’re not unreasonable, @startinganewforonce. and I don’t agree that being aware of basic food hygiene is akin to having OCD. My husband does the BBQs - he’s a normal bloke but he washes his hands after touching raw meat and is exceptionally careful to ensure the raw meat juices don’t touch anything else. Especially as we have little ones.

Yuck. No. Yanbu. Your hygiene standards are spot on and I can totally understand how it would be a situation you had to remove yourself from due to the OCD.

I would have kindly told him he needs to wash his hands because he has just touched raw meat. I think people would be more offended with a sudden discreet exit than just a straightforward request.

YABVU and your OCD is going to cause major issues for your children if you don’t fully recover.

Most people with OCD don't fully recover, even with medication and therapy. Think of it more as working hard to gain functionality and get the worst of it into remission.
However even in remission, something like that would probably trigger a flare up of symptoms.
It's a pretty debilitating condition, I'm sure the OP isn't trying to be rude or awkward.

Are you a Saffer? 😃

I have been to 100s, possibly even 1000s too.

Sorry OP, I think YABU. Invite him to yours next time. Then you get to have some control over how the food is cooked.

In some countries people BBQ every day. My sister has her BBQ like an extension to her kitchen and uses it as much as her hobs or oven

This!!! I'd have left with my child too.