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AIBU?

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Mid week large weddings

36 replies

Mumforadecade1 · 24/08/2024 15:18

Is it unreasonable for couples to plan large (80+ day guests ) mid week weddings and expect Friends/Family to use annual leave to turn up ? I understand it’s cheaper to book a nice venue mid week but I am sick of using holidays to attend these things !
Aibu or should bride / groom expect lower turn out at mid week weddings ?

OP posts:
Dirtydonna · 24/08/2024 15:32

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rainbowunicorn · 24/08/2024 15:31

What about people who's shift pattern incudes weekend working. Is it okay for them to have to use annual leave for someone's wedding?
They are probably in a worse position since most weddings are at tbe weekend so probably have to use a fair bit of annual leave for weddings.

Itsallfunngamesuntil · 24/08/2024 15:30

I think they can probably expect a lower turnout.

You're not being unreasonable to decline though if your holiday allowance is overly restrictied

PS I don't think 80 to 100 people is a large wedding ...... but I live in northern ireland where all great aunts n uncles etc are usually invited

Cyclistmumgrandma · 24/08/2024 15:29

Got married on a Friday as the registrars were working to rule so not possible at the weekend. Several of our relatives couldn't make it. We understood and though we would have preferred them to be there we weren't surprised or insulted!

Cas112 · 24/08/2024 15:29

Just decline. They will probably be aware less people may accept due to this, they also may be thinking this is a good way of making a wedding cheaper

Sheeplesss · 24/08/2024 15:27

You politely decline, that's its.
Annual leave is precious.

Dirtydonna · 24/08/2024 15:27

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ladydeedy · 24/08/2024 15:27

Just dont go. I dont. Often it also means not just the day itself but a day either side for travel etc. Not to mention the expense.
It doesnt work for me but if others want to go then that's fine! It's an invitation - you can say no and there's no need to apologise either.

ThisBlueCrab · 24/08/2024 15:26

As above, it is an invitation not a summons. No one is forcing you to attend.

I suspect you would be the one whinging you weren't being invited because they had had to lower numbers to afford a Saturday wedding.

Theleaveswillbefalling · 24/08/2024 15:26

Of course they should be aware that not everyone can attend but there is nothing in your post which suggests they think otherwise. You can just say sorry our holiday allowence for that year is already accounted for and wish them a lovely day.

RhaenysRocks · 24/08/2024 15:24

An invite is not a summons. You can decline. They are not BU provided they don't take the huff if people can't attend.. especially if distance means more than one day off.

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