Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Falling asleep on the phone together is needy and weird?

29 replies

PersephoneSeethes · 23/08/2024 14:42

My 17 year old DS has been dating a girl from school for about six months, she is a year older than him and this is his first girlfriend. We live a fair distance from his school and so they can't see each other regularly out of term time.

I was giving my other child screen time for a game, they both have ADHD so we still keep gaming regulated because it's been an issue in the past, and I happened to see DS's screentime useage. It was at some crazy level which I didn't think possible because it was more hours in the actual week, I gently asked DS about it and reminded him that I don't like phones in his room. Now he's getting older, I'm becoming less strict with it and I'm just trying to discuss the issues of phones in bed etc.

He said that he and his girlfriend fall asleep together while on the phone, leaving it on all night. Is it a new thing that people are doing with basically free voice calls these days or are they being particularly needy? I grew up with a (self funded) mobile phone from first year university in the late 90s, so I'm not a techno-phobe. My husband and I just find it bizarre, needy and slightly concerning, there have been some other troubling patterns of behaviour from DS's girlfriend in the past.

OP posts:
BeatsAntique · 23/08/2024 15:00

Very, very normal at this age. I definitely did it, and I know my DC has as well. All part of the joys of discovering new elements of growing up.

readysteadynono · 23/08/2024 14:51

Normal teen romance stuff

Shallysally · 23/08/2024 14:50

My DD used to do the same when she first started seeing her BF. Apparently it’s what some young people do.

She and her friends would do the same during the Covid lockdowns.

Gilbertwasawuss · 23/08/2024 14:48

He is 17... it is SO normal for them to be a bit intense and want to spend every second with each other.

But if there's control or abuse concerns within the relationship, then I think you need to gently discuss those with him.

Not allowing his phone or telling him he cant talk to her at night wont actually help though and will drive them closer together.

Being a kind and supportive presence who he can come to if things go badly is a better way to go.

We all go through these relationships that end up being a learning curve.

Swipe left for the next trending thread