Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

People are talking about my 10 year old DD

106 replies

hi2416 · 23/08/2024 13:21

I’m really confused what to do and how to handle this. I’ve ignored it as been going on for about a year but it doesn’t seem to end. I stupidly thought I had heard the last of this! Saw a mum whose DS is in same class as my DD. She told me sorry she didn’t come to my DD’s party and she told me it’s because her DS is trying to stay away “from all the drama”, I wasn’t aware there was drama obviously I did know something was going on but not to this extent. It seems innocent enough that my daughter for about a year and a half has been saying she has a crush on so and so (changes from week to week). She’s my eldest so I had no experience but apparently the kids have been going home and telling their parents she has a crush on all the boys in class etc. I dontknow how to handle this. Should I ignore like I have been? Shall I say something to DD? I briefly spoke this morning to her and explained sometimes small things people can take wrong way and we should be careful but I don’t think she understood.

I’ve told her to just play with the girls when she gets back to school. The thing is I cannot ignore this anymore as so many parents have come to me to tell me so it’s not as small as I’m thinking plus she is getting left out now as people are trying to stay away from her, I didn’t think I would be dealing with these kind of issues at such a young age! Please be kind. I’m prepared for weird and thoughtless responses that attract these kind of threads in the beginning, so I won’t read straight away but will come back later to get a jist of what people are saying and answer any follow up questions to help me understand this. Thank you

OP posts:
hi2416 · 23/08/2024 13:31

Lindjam · 23/08/2024 13:27

Yeah there must be more to this. Is there a parent you can trust to tell you the truth?

Or you could try the class teacher?

I fully trust this mum and she told me she’s got older daughters and the school can be quite mean. She said she had the same with one of her daughters so she’s trying to help me. She said my DD seems really innoncent and people will use this against her. I’m really surprised as they’re 9 and 10 year olds! I wasn’t expecting this at all. Is it because kids are more grown up now? The lady who told me is very lovely and I could tell from her face she was debating whether to open up Or not.

OP posts:
angelinaballerina7 · 23/08/2024 13:29

I’d maybe ask the teachers what’s going on, then speak to your daughter to find out her take on it.

EDIT - just seen that the other boys will say he’s her boyfriend. Seems a bit OTT from the other parent, but maybe just tell her to stop telling people who she fancies going forward and I’m sure the whole thing will be forgotten very quickly!

hi2416 · 23/08/2024 13:28

Sorry I just was adding this to my edit but seen people are asking. So the mum said her DS didn’t want to come to the party as the other boys will say he’s her boyfriend. My DD is oblivious of any of this she has no idea.

OP posts:
Lindjam · 23/08/2024 13:27

Yeah there must be more to this. Is there a parent you can trust to tell you the truth?

Or you could try the class teacher?

neverbeenskiing · 23/08/2024 13:26

I'm not sure I understand, so the "drama" is that your DD apparently has crushes on boys in her class? That doesn't sound particularly dramatic to me! Am I missing something?

Theleaveswillbefalling · 23/08/2024 13:24

I think you need to ask the parents what drama. My child occassional says such and so are going OK and I say OK, what do you fancy for dinner. What you descibe isn’t drama. Some thing else must be going on.

Swipe left for the next trending thread