Friend is obsessed with having ADHD

Apples and oranges.

‘No, I don't like ignorant and ableist opinions, you're right.

You said ADHD "may or may not exist" despite it being a recognised psychiatric disorder.’

Doctors used to diagnose ‘hysteria’ in women, not as a one off reaction but an entrenched condition. it was a ‘recognised psychiatric disorder’, used to explain ‘awkward or untoward female behaviour ‘ . Do you think anyone who maybe didn’t accept that as a valid condition was ignorant and ableist? Or perhaps they just had an open and inquisitive mind, which helped to overthrow a particular ‘ psychiatric ‘ shibboleth.

Perhaps she'd be better off making new more understanding friends.

I took it as a reference to the increased awareness and diagnosis of the condition leading to more and more people identifying with the traits. I take this poster to be questioning how many people would actually be judged 'NT' if they explored it and paid for diagnosis, and that there's a tipping point where if ND people start to equal or outnumber NT people, we will need to reframe our definitions and rethink what 'typical' is. It an interesting point imo.

The referral pathway I use at work doesn’t have an option to refer urgently. Unless, obviously, someone was becoming depressed due to their ADHD, in which case they would be seen sooner for their depression. But they’d still wait for the ADHD assessment.

I’ve never met a normal person in my life! we are all neurodivergent.

Oh dear. This comment just highlights your absolute ignorance of what ADHD and other ND conditions are and the calamitous effects they can have. I would also be a bit careful about bandying around the 'normal' word.

ADHD is diagnosed when the behaviours that everyone has some aspects of impact their day to day in a way that is dysfunctional and disabling.

I’ve never met a normal person in my life! we are all neurodivergent.

i would keep away from your friend until she calms down.

This is great advice.

What an absolutely disgusting post, absolutely atrocious.

Yes, there are far more debilitating conditions, and plenty of us who have both ADHD and other more debilitating conditions. I have degenerative disk disease, sciatica, severe chronic pain, hypermobility, arthritis, asthma, migraine and Autism. I use crutches or a wheelchair to get around. Take a butt load of medications just to function through the day.

you know which one causes me the most difficulty day to day? The ADHD.. because it pervades through EVERY part of my day, more than my pain does. It affects my sleep routine (delayed sleep phase syndrome and insomnia) it affects my short term memory (forgetting to take my medications) it affects my moods, it stops me from eating, from going to the bathroom.

You have NO fucking idea what you're talking about. Kindly don't, just fucking don't.

I have a friend who doesn't have ADHD and constantly sends me Tiktok reels, memes, Insta videos that interest her, and anything that catches her fancy. I said gently that I am involved in a big project at work and am trying to reduce my social media consumption, so I won't be clicking on Tiktok or Insta. It happens to be true as well.

Would that work?

@housethatbuiltme

great post, thanks.

What medication?

You can't access ADHD meds without a prescription, if she's getting them, the kids have a valid diagnosis, or she's buying them illegally, in which case you should report her to the police and social services for child abuse.

Also , I don't know why people want to gatekeep autism or ADHD or anything similar... It's a spectrum, we are all different, and unless you're a doctor, you cannot know the effects it has on people's lives. You cannot judge them.

I only manage my life due to years of extreme strategy forming. By manage, I mean live a really quite alternative lifestyle just because it works and I'd burn out and die if not.

But sure, because I don't tell anyone my intimate medical history, then surely tik tok videos diagnosed me, because I can mask a lot of things quite well ... No 🙄

Funnily enough, she's exhibiting a huge ADHD trait in doing this. Imagine feeling different all your life, imagine knowing something is there but you don't have the knowledge or words to articulate exactly what it is. And yet it affects every single thing.
It's a HUGE set of feelings when you can contextualise literally every interaction, choice, feeling and life experience you've ever had. And.diagnosis takes so long that she will be fizzing over, learning about it all

If you don't want to support her through it, don't. Let her find a good friend who can help her settle her feelings to a more stable level as she learns more and accepts it, and relaxes a little about it all
It is an all-encompassing realisation though, and I do think she's handling it in a usual ADHD manner!.

However, if it's boring to you, that's a legitimate reason to not bother with her much if you're not that close. Other people's health and constant talking about it can be selfish and boring as fuck, I do agree to an extent.

OK she might have it. But it really pisses me off as someone diagnosed as a teen and suffering really badly because of it my whole life that people watch tiktok and now all of a sudden if you are a bit clumsy or forgetful or badly organised you deffo have adhd.

yoga cures depression?

erm no....
the gym is beneficial to anyone with signs of depression or adhd

you probably wouldnt know though...

This!

Depression, as in major depressive disorder, is not a state in which you can just 'crack on', eat healthily and go to the gym.

The irony is that 'depression' evolved in a similar way to how ADHD has evolved. You barely heard about people being diagnosed with it 30 years ago, now you hear about it constantly. People self-diagnose all the time, just like Anitapua has. Feeling a bit low? You must have depression!

But for some reason, people who suspect they have, or have a diagnosis of, depression aren't subjected to the same stigma, scepticism, scrutiny and vitriol.

"Hi friend, I'd never want to hurt your feelings or make you feel uncomfortable, but I'm finding how often we discuss ADHD excessive for me personally, and I'd like to take a break from it. I'm here to support you and listen to your feelings if and when a diagnoses if reached. I love talking to you about so many things and would like to bring that back."

Sounds like she's feeling displaced in life and looking to explain the part of herself she feels uncomfortable with – whether she should or not. She's probably so desensitised to thinking about it that she doesn't realise how excessively it's coming up. If she's a good friend, she will listen to YOUR feelings too and accommodate them.

…. And that would mean that we’ve set up society and education to exclude the majority making it something worth considering restructuring.

No no we get you. You're one of those people who thinks yoga can cure depression.

Have you considered that you're actually just sad, not depressed?

@Anitapu on the contrary, I think you’ve put your opinions across very concisely, certainly your first post was passionately explaining your stance.

I just think there is a lot of disagreement with you over opinions that you’ve put a lot of weight on. If the gym and ‘getting on with it’ are working for you then great, but your reaction to others reactions doesn’t really match up with that.