Daughter refusing to speak normally

My 8 year old and her friends do this. I’d say it’s a phase. An annoying one, I may add.

@Maryahadaballtodayyour responses on this thread seem a bit oddly focused on irrelevant details. Could you explain why your child has seen 3 psychiatrists? That information could be extremely relevant here.

My DD went through this phase and several of her friends' mums also complained of similar. We decided it was a reaction to "growing up" i.e. puberty, periods were being discussed at school, some of the boys were making comments on the girls bodies, leg hair etc.
I went for the ignore, offer a nap or an early bed, occasionally answer back in a baby calming voice and sing a lullaby. It passed.

My dd did this for a while although she just spoke in a babyish voice as opposed to using babyish language. I’d always ask her why she was doing it and that seemed enough for her to stop. She’d usually do it when she was sitting with us and getting attention from us so it wasn’t an attention thing for her.

For some reason she is role playing at being a much younger child. This could have a relatively innocuous reason such as having spent time around young children and thought they were cute (i remember at a similar age going through a phase of adopting my young cousins speech patterns as i thought she was adorable. As did everyone else, which no doubt contributed!) Or it could be that she feeling a bit anxious and reluctant about growing up. Not every child is rushing to be a 'big girl/boy'. Some enjoy being a young child and want to hold on. I think rather than tell her she's a big girl, I'd ask her (outside of challenging the baby talk) how she feels about becoming a big girl.

Oh dear... The answer is clearly in front of OPs eyes and she can't see it...

I've only read your posts @Maryahadaballtoday

I think you sound a decent human being who is hacked off by one of your daughter's behaviours. I used to get hacked off with several of my daughters behaviours in her primary school years.

I would be annoyed with that behaviour too.

My advice would be to ignore ignore ignore. You've spoken to her about it at a calm time. She's still doing it. You've tried to address it in the moment. She's still doing it.

You're going to need to power through until she goes back to school. I imagine her friends will give her short shrift when term begins and that'll sort it out. Personally, I wouldn't respond to anything she says in baby talk. Do what your husband is doing.

If she’s doing it all day then she likely can’t help it.

I have no advice, but that would absolutely drive me crazy. I hope it’s a short phase. My friend is a SENCO at a primary and I think she’d say ignore. She gave me that advice when my then 4yo son started suddenly stammering and I was being irrational and freaking out.

She's probably just a bit out of sorts because of no school etc., then found something to entertain herself with.

Treat her like a baby ("no TV until your three!") but play baby games in the house. The duller the better. Dont let her have ice cream, sweets, etc, just milk for snacks. If you turn it into a game that youre playing too, then it'll soon get boring.

Or if youre out, then roll your eyes at her.and go for a briski"no. We'rr not playing the baby game now" or "if you cant be bothered to speak properly then I wont bother to listen" type of response when out and about.

Why 3 professionals and an ASD screen if no other issues?

And this comment says it all.

Just because your nephews don’t do it doesn’t mean it isn’t a common sign. It can also be a sign of neurological issues.

This clearly isn’t an isolated thing either so the question is why aren’t you doing more?

Why has she seen 3 shrinks?

All behaviour is communication. There will be a need thats not being met. The shady none answers to why autism has come up and seeing 3 different professionals and the fact you have autism in your family probably points to her being ND.

If she does it at school it'll probably be a good thing to get on the sencos radar, if she stops jist keep an eye out for any anxiety coming out in another way.

Be thankful it's just a baby voice. Some of them regress in toileting.

My eldest went through the same phase at that age - drove me buts - she still does it but she know I have no patience for it now so had thankfully stopped for the most part. I think it's attention seeking and an awareness perhaps that they are growing up but trying to still hold on to that baby feeling

Stop worrying about whether your child will embarrass you and start wondering why she is struggling to express herself with you.

Do you think the bit you quoted might explain why OP was sterilised?

Actually it took me 4 and Half hours to drive there for work a few months ago from Cardiff
hope the Orme was worth the drive

I think op the posters could have a point about the job loss stress. She may not know the details but children do pick up on stress. Baby talk can be a cry for attention. Even teen girls and some women do it to each other when offering and seeking comfort :” nooooooo! Awww! Sooo sorry.” ( hugs)

Mind you I’m a bit confused about the timeframe as it sounds as though it has been going on longer than the job loss if she’s lost her friends, seen three psychiatrists etc?

Ooh bless op your daughter must be shattered after a day trip from south wales to Llandudno that was be at the very least a six hour round trip
you must all be pooped

Of course she won't use this with her teacher. She is trying, as best an eight year old child can, to tell you something. What do you think it might be?

Respectfully OP she probably knows something is up in the household just ignore the behaviour walk away from it if you can tell her to use her words and ignore her if she persists

Come on. There’s clearly more to this.

You have your tubes tied because you didn’t want another daughter? Did you mean daughter or child?

Then you decided to not have another child because both you are your partner are suffering with health issues due to long Covid? If you have been suffering to the point that you decided to have your tubes tied, she is likely to have picked up on it the fact that things are different. Both her parents have significant health issues, that hasn’t just gone over her head.

You seem to think she definitely couldn’t be ND. And if she isn’t ND the only other reason that would be understandable would be if she is from a ‘broken home’. You seem hugely defensive and quite judgemental.

Then we have an 8 year old who has seen 3 psychiatrists? But there’s no other problems. You even have a discussion with the school about whether she is autistic. But never shown signs?

She is doing it for a reason. You just haven’t figured it out. Most likely because she has picked up on the fact that you and your partner are now ill. Have a lot going on. She may enjoy the attention you give her when she does it. She might enjoy the attention when she is pushing your buttons. Then her brain is learning she gets what she wants. ND presents very differently in girls. It’s not uncommon for people like psychiatrists and parents and teachers to miss it.

I think (privately) you really need to look at what’s going on and be honest with yourself. Kids who don’t have any issues don’t see 4 psychiatrists. Their parents don’t have conversations about autism with teachers Unless there are concerns. Parents don’t go to multiple psychiatrists and teachers for a short period of baby talk.

There’s more going on. You don’t have to discuss here. But I don’t think you are even being honest with yourself.

Pretty sure she is bluntly telling people this to stop dozens of questions like is he her real dad? Does she see her real dad? Does he have another baby and she thinks she is being replaced questions

Equally children don’t have the skills to fully communicate everything they can perceive.

copy/pasted from your earlier post:

I'm saying that your DD very much is neurodivergent and that it's nothing to be ashamed of!

you don’t say ‘it sounds like’ here.