To say no when asked if sibling can come to party?

Which more thank likely is going to be a vice versa situation at that age….lets not get petty here. Most children have birthday parties and then invite those whose birthday parties they went to so it’ll all goes round… like one afternoon of cheap entertainment and food is going to be THAT enticing 🤣

And I really don't think the age gap between 3 & 5 is so huge as to be problematic.

Christ. It's really not CFery not to have childcare.

Say no because you've already told another invitee no due to the age/size of the child.

If it's just one extra child I'd be inclined to say yes as realistically one 5 year old isn't going to significantly add to the chaos of 10 toddlers 😂
I wouldn't allow any more though, so any further sibling requests would have to be declined.

3 and 5 is a very common age gap though, at many 3yos parties there'll be a 5yo sibling who's been allowed invite a friend or two. In our 6yo's class there's at least three younger siblings in 4yo's nursery room. I'd fully expect any party of 3yos to have a couple of 5yos knocking around, and vice versa.

You’re fine to say say, in the same way that she’s fine to ask. Equally, it’s your DC that is impacted by their friend not coming if you say no…

I would say something along the lines of "yes sibling can come however if I get more requests off others for siblings I may have to do a blanket no just to be fair as I have limited space in my house"

Also 2 weeks is not short notice to respond! Gosh I had two people confirm the morning of my DD's party one year.

I think it's fine. It's fairly standard that some siblings end up coming and presumably all the parents will stay which is why the parents have this problem. I think you're over thinking.

Why do you think she’s tight? She’s worried about the dynamic.

And there are so many threads where older kids have been allowed to mess around then I can see she may not want a 5yo at a party for 3yos.

We had to ask this recently as our childcare for eldest DD fell through and we didn’t have anyone. Personally I wouldn’t bat an eyelid if someone asked me this but you are of course within your rights to say no.

I don't think she's done anything wrong and I think that two weeks notice for a birthday party is plenty.

I'd say Yes, it's one extra kid. The mum will be there anyway.
Also sometimes if your playing party games it can be helpful if someone can demonstrate / knows what they are doing.

We don't know the circumstances, but sometimes it's not always easy to juggle kids, shifts, single parents, and you don't know what extra help they may or may not have.

How do you plan your manage those who just turn up with siblings? Will they all be turned away at the door?

I think you are way overthinking this. It’s your garden - it’s not a ticketed event. If you have a spare few party rings going why not say yes - a 5 year old will not change the atmosphere one bit - the sibling will either run riot with the three year olds or likely just sit with her mum. Just warn mum there will be no party bag for them or if you’ve got spare stuff just do her one up.

Poor woman. She might be a single mum and maybe she ‘didn’t tell you upfront’ because she was hoping to find some childcare but she couldn’t. So instead of her son missing out / letting you down she asked if the sibling could come. You can say yes or no. She has done absolutely nothing wrong

That’s very different to a home party though.

What’s the social norm in your area? Around here we would definitely raise eyebrows if we didn’t accommodate siblings at a home/garden/hall type party.

I think you're being a bit OTT. It's really common to ask if siblings can come. Is it really going to be so much extra work to make a couple more sandwiches? OPs will most likely stay and a 5 year old should be aware enough of the little kids and can amuse themselves. 2 weeks is plenty notice IMO.

I did a party for my dc at an activity venue...it was £16 a head. I invited one child and his mum asked if she could bring her younger child along. She was a single mum and I felt sorry for her so agreed and paid for an extra place. On the day, she didn't show up or even let me know she wasn't going to be there. £32 for her kids places there...I was fuming

I’d say yes but that is because I don’t have the balls to say no.

This.

Reading Mumsnet genuinely makes me sad. Always. And adds to my anxiety.

People in real life seem so lovely and I just start wondering if it's all a mask when you read the sort of stuff people get petty and angry about on Mumsnet.

Odds are the birthday child will be thrilled to have a big boy/girl there, or not notice. But if they are bothered, it's a good lesson in generosity and helping others.

I'm also sure they'd rather their friend was there than not.

I'd say yes because she has asked in advance.

When I did a party for my son I said yes to a single mum who asked if she could bring both of her children, no issue. What annoyed me was people turning up with siblings who hadn't asked and some hadn't even rsvp'd.
It was ok because it was a hall type thing but I couldn't give every sibling party bags. The one mum who had asked me though got two party bags for both her children on principle.