To say no when asked if sibling can come to party?

Message her back saying unfortunately due to lack of space you're limited to how many little ones you can have over. Offer for her to drop her child off so she can take the sibling elsewhere for a couple of hours.

I don't think saying no is rude in any way. I do think the fact mum's asked if she can bring sibling probably means she's no where to leave them. If your child, really want's her invited child there, make it work, if they aren't too bothered. don't!

Their reason for not answering in good time, could be because of finding care for the sibine. If the e styed to help with the party, you are both winners?

I often have to ask this, I have 2 children a year apart and if parties are on a Sunday they either both go, or neither go.

I don't see how any of it is awkward. If she does come with just one, maybe a grandparent had the other child for a bit, but it's just so much easier to take two than drop one at another location first!

@otravezempezamos just looked to your name. In the last two days you’ve had no child, one child and two children. So bizarre

I'd be fine with this if it's in the garden. I thought you were going to say a venue where you are paying per head. Childcare for other siblings can be tricky to sort.

That’s the issue, the parent needs to accompany so needs to bring the other with them

I can't quite believe all this angst over an extra kid who is roughly the same age. There are no 'dynamics' of a bunch of three year olds. They will mostly ignore each other. There will be tears, at least a couple will damage themselves on the bouncy castle. Chances are a couple will drop out due to illness anyway and you will grateful to have an extra kid there to make up the numbers.

Kids will be playing with others a few years above and below them at every stage of their life...at the park at school, (at most parties!) and nothing bad will happen.

We had a 4th birthday party for our youngest. I did individual party boxes and gave a choice on the invite. Much less food waste and cardboard can be recycled so not really a waste. I didnt feed adults, why would i? 😂 They werent technically invited, just their child. Thankfully most dropped and left anyway except friends.

I don’t understand everyone saying “what if everyone brought a sibling…”. That’s not the situation. One person has asked, to bring one extra child. I can’t see why it’s such a big deal. So inhospitable.

Im honestly this blunt, id lose no sleep if someone took a huff and didnt speak to again because i told them no 🤷🏼‍♀️
Especially a random parent

What 5 year olds have you been in contact with 😂😂😂

I don’t understand how the mother would not be accompanying a 3 year old to the party anyway - so would be there to supervise a sibling.

At least one parent has always accompanied such young children to Gdcs’ birthday parties.

The thought that a 5 year old could spoil the bouncy castle for 3 year old is a bit hilarious.Im sure he or she can bounce nicely! You get some massive 3 year old anyway,they do vary in size.

You should have put this on the invite so people could decline without explanation to save all of this. I’ve never been to a kids party in their home but there were times I had to take my younger one along too as their Dad’s rota wasn’t done when agreeing to attend the party. It’s your house, I’m not saying you’re in the wrong, it’s your home and you know what space you have, it just would have saved having this conversation.

The OP said the other child was almost 5, so that makes her still 4. And the other guests are 3. Those maths aren't mathing...

It would be a no from me. Parents know that siblings aren’t invited and she is being a CF. Say so sorry I can’t accommodate one more especially out of age range, not safe for the bouncy castle etc.

Yes it's unreasonable. I wouldn't refuse a request for siblings because I understand that people don't always have a fallback childcare solution.

It seems petty and uptight to be honest. Surely, it's the more the merrier at a kids party. Is it not likely some younger siblings will turn up anyway?

I think YABU to say no. I have 2 DS and this has happened at every single party we have ever thrown and its not only been accepted but expected. I recently threw ds2 his 5th birthday party and we had his friends and some siblings all ranging in age from 4-11. They all played on the bouncy castle with no issues. This will become more and more common as your little one goes to primary school so if this is something you find cheeky, I'd avoid throwing your DC another party. Ever.

I would say yes. It's one other child (that you know about, that the parent has actually had the decency and manners to ask beforehand), it's on your garden so no extra charge to anyone, and the child's parent will be staying.

Goodness life is just too short for this nonsense, let the child come, thank mum for checking beforehand, and all have a nice day.

This isn't the reason the OP has in mind, but I suspect it will be awkward because this mother will arrive with her 3yo, having called in all sorts of favours to get someone to look after her 5yo, and will find that everyone else with older and younger siblings has rocked up to the party with siblings in tow. My guess is this woman will realise she was the only one with the manners to ask upfront about bringing a sibling.

Bonkers comments on here! It's one extra child and it's in your garden, of course she should come. The size difference is a non-issue. At three, my son was the size of a five year old anyway.

At worse it's a choice between an awkward couple of hours with an extra five year old, or making an enemy of another mum at nursery with potentially years of hassle.

Always consider which long term outcome is better, and it almost always aligns with being kind rather than being petty

I think you're being precious about the party and saying no was a mistake.

The parent will be there to look after the two children after all.